In September 2011, an 83-year-old man named Maurice Sendak picked up the phone in his Connecticut home and called Terry Gross at NPR. He had been on her show many times before. As one of the most beloved childrenās book authors in history, he had written and illustrated Where the Wild Things Are, In the Night Kitchen, Outside Over There, and dozens of other books that became woven into the childhoods of millions. He had a new book out called Bumble-Ardy. He had created it during the most painful period of his life, while his partner of 50 years, Eugene Glynn, was dying. "I did Bumble-Ardy to save myself," he told Terry. "I did not want to die with him." What followed was one of the most beautiful interviews ever broadcast. For nineteen minutes, Maurice Sendak talked about getting old, about dying, and about the people he had loved. He spoke of the maple trees outside his studio window that were hundreds of years old and how, in the final stretch of his life, he had finally fallen completely in love with the world. He cried. Terry cried. Listeners all over the country, driving in their cars or washing dishes, pulled over and cried with them. He spoke of the tragedy of being 83 and outliving almost everyone he loved mostāhis parents, his brother Jack, his sister Natalie, his longtime publisher, and most painfully, Eugene. Then he said something that has been quoted ever since: "Iām not unhappy about becoming old. Iām not unhappy about what must be. I cry a lot because I miss people. They die and I canāt stop them. They leave me and I love them more." He talked about how strange it was to find peace so late in life. He had spent most of his years unhappy, raised by Holocaust survivors who carried a grief they passed down to him. He had spent decades in therapy, once saying he believed in the existence of happy people but had never been one of them. But near the end, something changed. He told Terry he was now in love with the world. He could look out his window at those beautiful trees and see them for what they were. He called it a blessing to grow old and have time for the things he lovedāthe books, the music, the quiet moments. "I have nothing now but praise for my life," he said. At the end of the interview, he shared something with Terry that stayed with everyone who heard it: "You are the only person I have ever dealt with... who brings this out in me. Thereās something very unique and special in you, which I so trust." As they both wept, he added: "Almost certainly, Iāll go before you go, so I wonāt have to miss you." Then, before hanging up, he gave her three final pieces of advice: "Live your life. Live your life. Live your life." Eight months later, on May 8, 2012, Maurice Sendak passed away peacefully in a hospital in Connecticut at the age of 83. His friend Gregory Maguire, the author of Wicked, was with him in his final days and brought him a gift: a photograph of Lewis Carroll sitting on a windowsill with his feet hanging outside. It was a perfect goodbye. The man who spent his life drawing children stepping into other worlds was now stepping into his own. His books remain in nearly every library, and generations of children still join Max on his wild rumpus, always returning home to find their dinner waiting for themāand still hot. In that final interview, he told Terry he would keep crying for the people he lost all the way to the end. "Iām a happy old man," he said. "But I will cry my way all the way to the grave." He cried because he loved them. That was the whole secret. That was always the whole secret.
