nique ta mère

in my this cannot continue and yet it does era

roses are red, tomatoes are sweet, HE BOOTS TOO BIG FOR HE GOT DAMN FEET

me giving my pet chihuahua two kisses: chimuahmuah

Statistically this is very true! Women tend to not apply to jobs unless they meet 100% of the job requirements, while men typically feel more comfortable applying if they only hit around 60% of the requirements.

this is the most painfully true thing i have ever had to admit

was just Remembering how you’d be out with a friend and you’d each order a different cocktail and you’d ask “what’d you get?” and they’d read the description off the menu and you’d be like “ooh that sounds good” and then they’d say “try it!” and then you’d have a lil sip of their drink and they’d have a lil sip of your drink and you’d decide which one was best and you wouldn’t give each other a life-threatening respiratory infection

hmm? what’s that? oh, you don’t like my seeds? *evolves into a fruit that bears no seeds but is now a monoculture that is especially susceptible to pests and disease* how about that idiot 

Don’t vague post about bananas you scum

I don’t know why but this looks to me like I’m on an operation table receiving surgery from cats

Nevermind this is it

dead

Wait I’ve seen this

not to be a misogynist doctor from the 1800s but i’m pretty sure my uterus is moving around my body, biting my other organs, and also is possessed by the devil