KND adults in a modern school headcanons!!
• never there when you need him. he's always off-campus at "board meetings" or smth like that, but if you're wagging behind the school?? here he comes around the corner!
• always folds when his staff glaze him. he knows they're only saying it to grease him up and he'll call them out on it but also he's like "dooon't– stoppp.. i said don't stop."
• walks into class at random times to just stand in the doorway and observe while everyones waiting for him to leave so they can go back to slacking off.
• someone leaked his facebook account and he got slandered so bad that he made one of the staff hold an emergency assembly where they talked about cyberbullying "just to remind the student body."
• gets more shit done than Father.
• openly admits that he hates kids and he only works at school because they let him get away with so much (plus his besties are there and the gossip is great).
• will only make students do the bare minimum of work to pass then he gives free time so they stop bothering him.
• WAAAYY too comfy with his class lmfao. throws gluesticks and books at rowdy kids with crazy precision. do not trust him with a stapler he will use it as a firearm.
• senior kids generally understand him better because they know he just wants them out of his (lack of) hair and he'll pretty much let them do anything as long as he has plausible deniability.
Mr Fibb and Mr Wink: History teachers.
• nobody knows if only one of them is qualified to teach and the other is just an aid or what, they're just always together.
• so deadpan it's laughable. yk how everything is 10x more funny when you're at school and not meant to make noise? YEAH, you're cooked if you have them as your teachers.
• they're actually not that funny it's just the school air makes them prime entertainment.
• gets exploited like crazy for pride month. "look at our gay staff slaaayyy!!" (all the staff is gay).
• if one of them is gone due to sickness or something then the other walks into class with a raincloud over their head, looking at the space where the other would usually be.
• some kid tried to throw a globe at Wink (probably Wally) but he was protected by his glorious hair.
