ordinary people by judith guest
depression, self harm, suicide mention.
âit might help if you just let it out, __.â
âyou donât feel hot to me. is it a headache?â
âlet me hold you awhile.â
âyou get any last sleep last night? how about food? you had anything to eat since yesterday?â
âlet me get you some aspirin.â
âyouâll feel better once you eat.âÂ
âsomething is bugging you, something is making you nervous.â
âyouâre going to bed? at seven oâclock?â
âall healing is done from the outside in.â
âlook, i donât want to be â iâm not being too rough on you, am i?â
âonce i tried to kill myself, howâs that?â
âlisten, a bloody nose is nothing.â
âi donât know what happened! i donât know! iâm sorry about everything!â
ânowhere. just taking a walk.â
âmaybe you gotta feel lousy sometimes, in order to feel better.âÂ
âhow bad? razor - blade bad?â
âi canât! i canât!â
âsometimes, people say stupid things, because theyâre stupid.â
âi need to sleep. let me sleep.â
âall right. make fun. itâs the thing you do best anyway.â
âeverythingâs jello and pudding with you, __.âÂ
âyou keep at me, make me talk about things i canât talk about, i canât!â
âi didnât mean it, iâm sorry. please. donât be mad.âÂ
âa good, healthy problem needs a good, healthy solution.â
âpeople donât change on command from other people.â
âgive yourself a break, why donât you? let yourself off the hook.â
âsounds like a chapter heading to me.â
âyou donât understand. it has to be somebodyâs fault. or what was the whole goddamn point of it?â
âcrazy world. or maybe itâs just the crazy view we have of it, looking though a crack in the door, never being able to see the whole room, the whole picture.â
âa little advice, kiddo, about feeling. donât think too much about it. and donât expect it always to tickle.â
âwhat things? i want you to tell me.â
âand the world is full of pain. also joy. evil. goodness. horror and love. you name it, itâs there.â
âand what about tomorrow then? and all the tomorrows to come? why canât we talk about it? why canât we ever talk about it?â
âyou canât feel pain, you arenât gonna feel anything else, either.â
âthatâs what happens when you bury this junk, kiddo. it keeps resurfacing. wonât leave you alone.â
âlife is not a series of pathetic, meaningless actions. some of them are so far from pathetic, so far from meaningless as to be beyond reason, maybe beyond forgiveness.â
âi give a damn about everything you do.â
âso how does it feel to be home?â
âpeople use people according to their own needs. or donât use them. when a primary need is one of safety.âÂ
âand what if i donât have an answer? you want me to make one up?â