Freedom

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@thestuffshesaw
Freedom

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maybe i’ve been too afraid of not what would spill out onto the page, but what would stay behind. sticking to the sides of me like the last bit of that yummy honey. the kind that coats its jar, like it’s melded to it, become a part of it. that’s the stuff i’m maybe scared of.Â
ladies
blue is the most beautiful in Cuba
Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.
-Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky

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Lately, craving a dip in these salty waters more than ever.
Song: Saltwater by Geowulf
Sayulita, Nayarit Mexico 2016
I told you I'd run away with you
Courage is not being hard It's time to peel back all of the layers You put between who You're meant to be And You who are And go be who You are
India Arie
A song of despair
The recollection of you emerges from the night in which I am The river mixes its stubborn sadness with the sea.
Abandoned like the wharves at dawn. It is the hour of departure, oh foresaken one!
Cold flowers pour over my heart. Oh pit of debris, ferocious cave of the shipwrecked.
In you the wars and the flights accumulated. From you the wings of the song birds rose.
You swallowed everything, like distance. Like the sea, like time. In you sank everything!
It was the blissful hour of attack and embrace. The hour of the charm that shown like a lighthouse.
Pilot’s dread, the fury of blind driver, turbulent inebriation of love, in you sank everything!
In the childhood of mist my soul, winged and wounded. Lost discoverer, in you sank everything!
You girdled sorrow, you clung to desire, sadness stunned you, in you sank everything!
I made the wall of shadows recede, beyond desire and action, I passed on.
Oh flesh, my own flesh, woman whom I loved and lost, I summon you in the hour of dampness, I raise a song to you.
Like a container you housed endless tenderness. and the infinite oblivion destroyed you like a container.
There was the black solitude of the islands, and there, woman of love, your arms embraced me.
There was thirst and hunger, and you were the fruit. There were grief and ruin, and you were the miracle.
Ah woman, I do not know how you could contain me in the earth of your soul, in the cross of your arms!
How terrible and brief my desire was to you! How difficult and drunken, how tense and determined.
Graveyard of kisses, there is still fire in your tombs, still the fruited boughs burn, pecked at by birds.
Oh the bitten mouth, oh the kissed limbs, oh the hungering teeth, oh the entwined bodies.
Oh the mad coupling of hope and force in which we merged and despaired.
And the tenderness, light as water and as flour. And the word scarcely begun on the lips.
This was my destiny and in it was the voyage of desire, and in it my longing fell, in you sankeverything!
Oh pit of debris, everything fell into you, what sadness did you not express, in what sorrow are you not drowned!
From billow to billow you still called and sang. Standing like a sailor in the prow of a vessel.
You still bloomed in song, you still brake the currents. Oh pit of debris, open and bitter well.
Pale blind diver, luckless slinger, lost discoverer, in you sank everything!
It is the hour of departure, the hard cold hour which the night fastens to all the timetables.
The rustling belt of the sea circles the shore. Cold stars rise up, black birds migrate.
Deserted like the wharves at dawn. Only ominous shadow turns in my hands.
Oh farther than everything. Oh farther than everything.
It is the hour of departure. Oh foresaken one!
–Pablo Neruda, La Canción Desesperada from: Veinte Poemas de amor y una canción despesperada (1924)

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When you said you wanted what you couldn’t have–-then you got what you didn’t want.
đź’”
- photo by CMC, circa 2012.
Summer 2016 Starting over.
When you get to the end of all the light you know and it's time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: either you will be given something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly.
Edward Teller
”There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in.”
-Leonard Cohen
sitting, watching, walking, waiting
life in Mexico City

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In a city as modern and ever-evolving like Mexico City, some things stay the same.