TheSleepyAce

Do y’all ever feel like a toddler trying to take care of itself

Like I just spent 30 mins eating random unsatisfying snacks until I finally figured out I was just thirsty

Dusting this off for the last time. Rise, my art son.

Pinky was really the homie even when Brain was an ass about shit

This legit made my heart warm

@strange-aeons

*finishes a roll of wrapping paper* oh shit free weapon

*bonks myself in the head* *bonks myself in the head* *bonks myself in the head* *bonks myself in the head* *bonks myself in the head* *bo

Came up to me the other day, the middle of his pants totally soaked, and said “mama, I’m having a situation called ‘I peed in my pants.’”

I don’t think I even told you guys about the six months he spent saying “fuck” instead of “truck.”

when i say “i don’t like drama” what i really mean is “i don’t want to have my own drama.” your drama, on the other hand,  

This is it. This is the post.

during one of his portland shows, he noticed this like 7 year old girl in the front row and asked her (and her parents) if she ‘is aware that she is physically here right now’ or if she was just brought along. turns out her favorite john mulaney bit is the “and I’m new in town” bit and that she’s seen all his stuff. He was so shocked and discomforted by the fact a SEVEN YEAR OLD has seen his shows, that he couldn’t get through a bit about donating to charity without interrupting himself at least three times to import good life lessons on this small child, as if that makes up for all the horrible things he’s said that she heard

ah so john mulaney is a chaotic neutral cryptid

This all makes me so, so, so happy. 

Every year, this post surprises me and I laugh.