Madison

Tooth fairies are a smaller and friendlier subspecies of the larger and much more hostile bone fairies.

Thank you for this bespoke nightmare

bro forget that how much money do i get for a femur under my pillow

after careful consideration i have decided to simply stop thinking about my actions and instead just fuck around and find out

what i do is nobody's business, especially my own. i will not be taking any further questions at this time.

mr sandman was playing in this gas station and the cashier and i both sang “man me a sand” at the same fucking time without hesitation

authority figures be like you are making my job hard on purpose by having needs i am required by law to accommodate for

if you did not hate me you would simply stop choosing to have a disability

We call musicals unrealistic because people randomly burst into song but I’ve been home alone for like 3 days and I start singing about what I’m doing every 5 minutes