ambitious for a motley coat

you hear the sound of a baby crying, with the doppler effect, and then it's gone. you whip your head around, searching, confused, but you're alone at home at night. it never happens again.

A famous baseball player has just made millions, but can they live with their decision?

the among us show being a total gorefest on par with john carpenter's the thing is a really fun choice

the among us show having a gay orgy in the middle of it is another really fun choice

"This town is full of very very small criminals...."

I was going to say “weird and arbitrary things are marked with the threat of execution” but yours is funnier

dude so distraught he forgot his age

Fanfiction is cool because you get to learn what other people's parents taught them the hymen is like

I know that I had somewhat unusually comprehensive sex ed but it still surprises me every time I'm reminded that some people genuinely think that losing your virginity is a capri sun kind of situation.

I would let her kill me for sport

happy pride month everybody

what are people's favorite niche ice cream flavors. mine are superman and blue moon (specifically from the midwest like michigan/indiana/wisconsin), van leeuwen's royal wedding cake, and jeni's wildberry lavender

graffiti discourse is so stupid why the hell would I give a shit if people spraypaint their names or do some cool paintings under a bridge

sorry didn't realize the bridge has to be plain beige concrete. that was a load bearing plain beige concrete if anyone tags it the whole bridge collapses

educating yourself on dog whistles of all kinds will have you feeling insane in settings where nobody questions anything they're parroting