I'm ruined over you @themelonface - Tumblr Blog

I know the “Vane called Flint gay for living in a house” thing is funny but I think in all seriousness Vane was calling Flint a class traitor for living in a house which is in some ways much funnier

fuck-you-jack

i love these tags so much

#black sails i miss you

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aquatransmissaest

He is so very happy his plan is working he can barely play at being chagrined before Dufresne. CONTROL YOURSELF you smug little crew-killer

scorpionlafemme

can-i-make-image-descriptions

[Image ID: Threads post from iBlameKaixin in all caps, reading: I just heard someone say "maybe you don't need more time to heal, maybe you need more experiences that show your nervous system a different reality" /End ID]

ellisonwongparty

the way rr/tierney introduce ilya is so funny to me because when you first see him you're just like jeez this guy is such an asshole why is he like this. and then seconds later it's just like um it's because he has a 1) dead mom 2) who killed herself 3) an abusive dad 4) with alzheimers 5) a brother 6) who verbally abuses him on the phone 7) when ilya refuses to wire him 50 bands all at once 8) all while he spends new years eve all alone in the grossest motel you've ever seen 9) and he's bisexual.

and you're just like. well shit. that will do it i guess.

what-is-love-babey-dont-hurt-me

What they don’t tell you about getting into bird watching is that once you get into it, you do not get to decide when you bird watch. You can be on the beach of some distant tropical country with nothing planned except relaxing. But then you see a Common Fluttering Nut Buster and you’re like fuckkkkkkkk holy shit guys the Common Fluttering Nut Buster is not supposed to live this far west holy shitttttttttt

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biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

so the synopsis of The Ring is: you will die 7 days after watching this videotape. my question is does that apply to rewatching the tape. let's say I watch the tape, wait 6 days, and watch it again. does the timer reset to 7 days? can I do this indefinitely? can I become functionally immortal by watching the evil videotape on a weekly basis?

shy-magpie

I require the film where someone decides this means they are functionally immortal for 6 days after watching the tape so seeks it out before going on a series of utterly batshit suicide missions. The tape keeps trying to do creepy crap around them and they're just like "I have 3 days 12 hours left to do this prison break so you're not even on my top 10 concerns, either distract this guard for me or go do something about that hair while you're waiting"

The ghost is so baffled and has no idea how to explain that's not how any of this works that it does save them a couple times while trying to get this across, thus convincing them the theory has been validated

utopians

people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour

milksockets

skin to skin: eroticism in dress - prudence glynn (1982)

deseos-de-la-via-lactea

source

utah-mountain-drifter-deactivat

snuv

A mom helping her kids beat a hard level in Super Mario Land, 1990s.

emily84

this is a renaissance painting

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free-my-mindd

kingbedlam

tragicburnout

i feel like there is a sleep in me that needs to be slept but each time i sleep i don't sleep that sleep

luckyladylily

So the thing is boobs really do be jiggling. If having breasts has taught me anything it is that the ladies frolic. I don't even have that large of boobs but every time I go down some stairs all I can think about is that stupid quote about boobing breastily down the stairs or whatever it is because God Damn.

But anime and video game boob jiggling is like. The most uncanny valley shit I've ever seen nine times out of ten. You would think people this horny about tits would have actually looked at some but I guess not.

What we really need is some pervert to compile the ultimate visual guide to boob bouncing physics that's just like 500 hours of meticulously organized videos of breasts of different size and shape and under different fabrics bouncing around from a wide variety of physical movements so horny game devs can finally get it right and I don't have to be creeped out by women who appear to have surgically implanted softballs in their chest under skin made of rubber bands.

jessaerys

what in the world are "pity likes" you guys are inventing new ways to be insecure. every like i give is a like with my whole pussy

youhaveaguineapigwhere

Everytime this gets a note when its nowhere near christmas I question my sanity just a little bit more

youhaveaguineapigwhere

No, it is July, stop that, stop giving this notes, you guys have lost reblogging privileges

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paverics

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

paverics

comedians can only dream of writing something this funny

kdramamilfs

'i cant believe shes 50 shes still so beautiful' 'she hasnt aged one day past 30' 'how is she STILL gorgeous??' you people are so weak. how about aging is hot and signs of age are sexy and shes getting more attractive every year. how about that

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