The Soldier's Hut

I am somewhat a fan of mysteries and cryptids, so it looked like a nice read. And obviously not connected to polar exploration, especially not to Terra Nova, right? Right?

Right?

Well, wrong. First article on the page, and what do I see?

So, ladies, gentlemen, gentlepersons and scientists, that Scott, the vicepresident and chairman of WWF, the man who wrote a foreword for the book in question is not just a Scott. He is THE Scott, Sir Peter Markham Scott, the only son of Robert Falcon Scott and his wife Kathleen. Terra Nova can find me anywhwhere, it seems and is like the Spanish Inquisition from the Monty Python skit: it appears when nobody expects it.

Take the Wars Of Roses, the very final act of it, and the big, big question: did King Dickie off his nephews, Teddy and, well, Dickie (both branches of Plantagenet house were horribly uncreative in the name department, the amount of Richards, Edwards, Henrys and Edmunds is truly confusing and makes me cross eyed at times; I shall not be complaining though, Polish history knows certain Silesian duke Konrad, who had five sons and named them ALL Konrad)? Spoiler: I do not think so.

But wait, what does Terra Nova, early twentieth century expedition have with that real life Game of Thrones (minus dragons and ice zombies)? Well, guess whom I've been repeatedly stumbling upon during my reads about Richard III, that Tudor usurper and unfortunate sons of Edward IV The Trouserbrain?

Sir Clements Markham.

Yes, THE Clements Markham, the spiritus movens behind the Discovery expedition, friend of Con, who had obvious hots for him to the very end (that pic is from the beginning of Terra Nova Expedition, as you can recognise from Kathleen's presence and Clemmie's old age. Old or not, he still has that spark in the eye when he looks at Scott).

But really, Lillie wasn't exagerrating.

Titus really has very lovely, well shaped rear end, y'all have to admit it.

I am deeply dorry about what I have done, but I could not resist.

Getting the ponies across the Tongue with its shallow but numerous crevasses and holes was ticklish work, but we tethered them safely off the Terra Nova, which meanwhile was landing dogs, sledges and gear. Then we got some lunch on board.

A large lead in the sea-ice to the south of the Tongue necessitated some hours’ work in man-hauling all sledges along the back of the Tongue until a way could be found down on to safe ice. We then followed with the ponies. “If a pony falls into one of these holes I shall sit down and cry,”’ said Oates.

Within three minutes my pony was wallowing, with only his head and forelegs visible, in a mess of brash and snow, which had concealed a crack in the sea-ice which was obviously not going to remain much longer in its present position. We got lashings round him and hauled him out. Poor Guts! He was fated to drown: but in an hour he appeared to have forgotten all about his mishap, and was pulling his first load towards Hut Point as gallantly as always.

It's not the only known Lawrence's expedition into the land of sewing, as he made a sackcloth balaclava during the winter, out of pure hatred he had for the felt helmets the expedition members were issued (no wonder, I get itchy from mere looking at it). The balaclavas worn by many expedition members neither warmed up his heart, so The Sackcloth Balaclava was created. This balaclava:

He looks weirdly cute in it. His another sewing feat were the breast pockets he slapped onto gis white woolen jacket, so he was not a stranger to the needle. Rare skill for a gentleman from ungodly wealthy family, who all his life had servants catering to him. Yes, in the military too, even a mere lieutenant in the British cavalry had two servants assigned.

But I was talking about the canvas pants, so let's get back to them and let's bask in their full sartorial glory for a minute:

I was staring a lot at these weird folds on his butt... Why yes, I do spend a lot of time gazing at the butt of Titus Oates. First, it's a very fine and well shaped butt and Denis Lillie does vehemently agree with me on that (according to Tryggve Gran Denis confessed he was blushing when he saw a fine man naked, well, I think he was blushing a lot when undressed Laurie was around):

Second, I was pondering what were these pants made of and where these folds came from. After some prolonged staring at Laurie's crotch (yes, I gaze at it too, these are the dark places studying the polar exploration can get you in 🤣), well, stare with me, please:

I found out the mystery folds extended to the front of the pants. My suspicion here is that Titus repurposed a sack and the folds were it's bottom, allowing it to expand when the sack was filled. He just cut the bottom in the middle, so one half landed in front, the other on the butt. By the way, in the front shot you can see also the marvellous breast pockets on his jackets.

I am pretty sure Oates never dared to suspect that over a hundred years later his btt would be a subject of meticulous analyses and consultations with professionals. So yes, it looks like he might have a butt pocket, let me add a little visual aid... and now all of you will stare at his butt.