Ghosted

cute puppy what breed is he

sideways

I like the nodding emoji 🙂‍↕️ for how at peace it is. when I use it I feel like a wise sage who has reached an enlightened truth of the universe. mmmm 🙂‍↕️ monkey

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss

How do you know you're not Asexual? Maybe you just haven't met the right nobody.

in my enclosure . straight up gnawing at it . and by "it" i mean. haha. well let's justr say . the bars

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

“I ain’t reading all that” your brain is rotting and shrinking

Imposter syndrome but for things I like. Poser syndrome.

Corn dogs are named for their traditional meat, the unicorn. As unicorns are now extinct, they can only be referred to properly as ‘Corn Dogs and not “Unicorn Dogs” as they were prior to 2009.

This is actually a common misconception! While the Unicorn Dog did exist and was discontinued following the extinction of unicorns in 2009, the Corn Dog is not a rebranding of the Unicorn Dog! The Corn Dog was created in 2003 by James H. Corn, though it remained a relatively unpopular Ohio treat until 2010 when Mr. Corn took the opportunity left by the Unicorn Dog’s exit from the market to take over the niche.

it feels like we're all simmering. someone turn us over. someone stir us.

FREE ME!!!!!!! Idk from what...I just want to be free from literally everything