THE COUSIN .

' i don't know how to thank you two enough, ' greg says, while eddie's happy to scoop up the toddler, ready to tuck him ( back ) into bed. greg is quick to sidle over to the kitchen island, looking for the bottle of red wine his fiancé had forgotten to put back on the counter. stemless glasses are produced — though two, one each for mason and eddie when they return are left on the counter — with a generous pour, greg slides the glass over to @wineassassin. ' we're all out of white, but we tried this brand last week, and i'm obsessed. ' a grin. ' i behaved tonight, too. i only had one glass. there's this brilliant italian place down on, uh. seventy something, i'll send you a pin. i think you guys should try it some time. ' a beat, and a glance towards rowan's bedroom. ' i hope he wasn't too much trouble ,,, this was our first date night since he was born. '

› he's really digging the new hair.

' okay, okay, look. i know i've only written one book so far. and it was about my fucked up family. and none of my romance writing will ever see the light of day past a heavily guarded, secret archive of our own account. but i like reading junk fiction, y'know, it's nice to turn my brain off for a little while, and read a nice romance or a horror or something like that. but, man, this fucking book. i dunno if it's just because i know, uh, jack shit about racing? but i think it might've been the worst written book i've read in the last few months, @saltwaters. junk fiction is supposed to be a genre exploration. not, y'know, failing at basic grammar. maybe i SHOULD start publishing fiction under a pen name. any recommendations? '

' listen, i've never really been into roleplay or any of that, but — shut up, @differentkinds, don't look at me like that. it's called doctor daddy — heather, stop — and it's like, part of a whole series of books where women just fall for, y'know, a bunch of hot daddies! and i mean, y'know, technically, eddie is a daddy now, has been for like, a year and a half, and — y'know, i'm feeling REALLY FUCKING JUDGED RIGHT NOW. '

' we've been reading a lot to our son lately, y'know, mostly random board books and all, but i've been trying to introduce him to a little bit more of the, y'know, darker humor that his grandparents are into, but nothing insane. i mean, i'm not reading him all my friends are dead, ' yet ' or anything like that. but this one author did a little series of books, about like, hats getting stolen? so, the first one, a bear has a hat that was stolen, and he wants it back, and goes through a bunch of little critters in the, the forest, to try and find it, and finally finds the rabbit wearing the hat, who says he hasn't seen it, and then he asks a bunch of other animals, and he realizes, you know, I HAVE SEEN MY HAT! the rabbit had it, right? so then he has the hat back, and the rabbit is nowhere to be seen. and the bear just, y'know. swears he didn't eat the rabbit, he'd never eat a rabbit, why would you ask him that? ' a protracted moment of silence. ' ... do you think that's a little too dark, @tenderments? '

' look, @milleroptimism, i'm not proud of it, but i really liked the first book in the series, so i have to keep going. i'm a completionist. this one — instead of a priest who falls for one of his parishioners — it's about the priest's brother, who's, like, y'know, a total, a total playboy, and he decides he realllllllllly wants to fuck a nun - in - training, but then he falls in love with her? it's one of those forbidden romances, like star - crossed lovers. i can't help it, they're so addicting to me. '

' oh my god, it was so bad. it's like, supposed to be THE LION KING, but make it a dark romance? ' he mimes gagging, but pulls himself together. ' short version, @helbent, instead of sarabi and mufasa, sarabi is arranged to be married to mufasa, who i think she was supposed to kill? and instead falls for scar ... i actually can't remember if they kill off mufasa in the end. they probably should've, he's atrocious. i've already downloaded the other books in the series to my kindle. '

' so, for, y'know. funsies, i took a, um. children's literature class. and while i've been trying to get my fiancé to agree to adopting a cat, i figured i'd read, y'know, a book about cats for my poetry unit. well, i couldn't bring myself to read HATE THAT CAT, so i read the companion book, which was all about a dog the writer had when he was younger. @atleur , have you ever loved something so much you'd write poetry about it? i can't imagine being able to write something so touching about anything outside of my son. '