Carla's Diary

for so long i always felt a sense of struggle when it came to my achievements. i could reach my goals but it always felt so hard, and it usually came paired with periods of burn out and malaise. then i found out why: i was often neglecting foundational needs, living in chaos and not taking proper care of myself, and trying to zoom straight to big-picture achievements.

below is my ultimate guide to 'the good life'. the more balance you can achieve in each category, the easier and more pleasurable it becomes to reach your goals. you will still have to stretch yourself and explore beyond your limits... but it should feel relatively nice because you are supported by a nourishing lifestyle.

you deserve a beautiful, healthy, passion-filled life. here's how you get it:

01. your foundation: the essentials

physical health: create nourishing routines for sleep, exercise, and nutrition. your literal energy starts here, so if you’re trying to bring positive energy to your life and achieve success, you need foundational energy.

mental and emotional health: build resilience and develop strategies for coping with pressure and stress. take care of your mental health always, not just when you’re already spinning out.

financial stability: learn to manage your money wisely. budgeting, saving, and debt management are a must.

02. your core: connections + fulfilment

your home: whether you have just a bed, a room, an apartment, or a whole house, create a safe, comforting space to recharge and feel grounded.

strong relationships: surround yourself with supportive and meaningful connections - so much about ourselves is defined by those we are close with so choose wisely.

meaningful work: follow your sense of purpose and find work or projects that bring a sense of fulfilment and satisfaction to your life. remember that it may not always be paid work. if you have no idea, just keep trying things and follow what interests you, while working on the next stage.

03. your growth: personal development

personal growth: invest into self improvement, developing new skills, growing your knowledge and learning as much as possible.

spiritual fulfilment: find purpose, whether through spirituality, self-reflection, or a connection to something bigger.

creativity & self-expression: explore creative outlets and express your true self to find a grounding sense of joy and authenticity.

04. your larger contribution: beyond the self

community & contribution: give back, volunteer, or participate in community initiatives to connect with a greater sense of purpose and life-giving connection.

legacy & impact: define the mark you want to leave on the world, through family, work, or contributions to society. think deeply about what you wish to leave behind and tailor your life to this goal.

05. your enrichment: quality of life enhancers

play & leisure: make time for joy, hobbies, and relaxation for rejuvenation, calm, and passion. if your day to day work isn't your passion, it's so essential to find passion here.

your ultimate guide on how to prepare a bag for whatever the world throws at you!

( any bag should work ─ you could use a smaller bag or use a bigger bag with heaps of pockets! )

WHAT TO PACK .ᐟ

face/makeup related:

makeup for touch ups (if you wear it!)

spare lash glue (if your use falsies!)

lip balm

lip gloss

mini flip mirror

body, hand and hair related:

deodorant (preferably spray on)

mini perfume/body mist

mini lotion

hand cream

hand sanitizer

nail file

spare pad/tampon

hairbrush and/or comb

hair ties

pencil case:

mini notebook

pen and pencil

eraser

mini ruler

sharpener

highlighter

purse/wallet essentials:

house/car keys

ID

drivers license (if you drive)

credit card

spare loose cash

any useful gift cards you own (make sure they have money on them and that they're not expired!)

misc:

gum

mints

wet wipes

mini tissue pack

a snack

bandages (you can also go the extra mile and make a mini first aid kit, although this is optional!)

This is my dream girl guide as inspired by @2pretty and her original post. I'm going about things a bit differently, I'm not taking a month for each quality, but rather aspiring to embody these traits daily.

She embraces and uses her feminine energy. She is happy, positive, calm and otherworldly. She tries to always think and behave positively, even if she risks being labeled a Pollanna. At the same time, she does not fear having strong boundaries and putting herself first where need be.

She keeps her surroundings spotless and organized, and takes great pride in presenting her surroundings as an extension of herself.

She is very hardworking and always gives 110 percent to her goals. She spends a large portion of her time studying and achieving financial stability.

She has productive hobbies that she engages in when she is not working or studying.

She makes her physical health and appearance of utmost importance and takes her vitamins, eats enough, drinks water, and goes to the gym.

She is impeccably groomed and detail oriented in her appearance, from her teeth to her nails and her hair. She strived to look polished and flawless and has a strict beauty routine.

She always takes time to dress well and look her best when she goes out and carries herself with utmost poise.

She values her mental health, and takes time each day to check in with herself, and takes action to ensure her peace.

She nourishes her spiritual life and builds her relationship with God.

She works to expand her social circle and has a busy and fulfilling social life. She has close high value friends, and a large circle of networking acquaintances.

She has a well curated and elegant social media presence.

How to Stay Classy

Pretty Privilege Breakdown

Harsh Truth about Pretty Privilege

2pretty Tip

Confidence Tips

Confidence Tips pt. 2

It Girl Essentials

Dolled Up

Conceited Vibe

Sense of Self

Pretty Privilege Utilization

or, a simpler way of putting it, "Sometimes rules are saying exactly what a person should be doing and you won't be safe/won't be successful without following the rule. These rules can only be broken in extreme circumstances OR if you understand what will happen, WHY that will happen, and are ready to deal with the consequences.

"Other rules are meant to change the amount of people doing something, or change the kind of person that is doing something. It's not actually expected that everyone follows the rule, only that people will break the rule in smaller numbers or only if they have a "good reason" for it. Some rules like this have no consequences, they are just describing what someone would really like you to do, even if that person has no power to make you do it or cause consequences if you don't. Some rules like this are a kind of secret handshake where you are supposed to be able to figure out that you're supposed to break the rule if you're the right kind of person. Some rules will only have consequences if you get caught, and sometimes it's so easy to not get caught that no one faces consequences unless someone is specifically trying to catch the person breaking a rule.

I’ve been getting lazy lately and that won’t do. No more playing around.

The animal agriculture class was the first time I experienced each macronutrient (fats, proteins, carbohydrates) being discussed in depth from the point of view of being needs that MUST be met, rather than things it's "okay" to eat "in moderation."

My college health class actually used the word "macronutrient," but it still mostly described fats and carbohydrates in terms of their calorie content and didn't go into the same amount of depth about them.

My animal agriculture class on the other hand, was the first time I'd been taught in a class that the amount of nutrition absorbed from eating food varies depending on genetics, environmental factors, what the digestive system is accustomed to processing and what it was conditioned to process during development, and mechanical aspects of the digestion process like how much it is broken down by chewing (!!). Of course it was discussing these things from the point of view of like, cows, but it was really striking to me that I'd never been taught about human digestion from this point of view, where digestion is a complex process that can be affected by various biological and environmental factors.

At the beginning of the class we did a lab where we went over feedstuff analysis, and this was the first time I'd learned about where the numbers in nutrition labels come from, the kind of tests that are done to break food down to its components.

The class discussed how the digestibility of food was analyzed by testing the food, feeding animals the food, collecting the feces, and doing the same tests on the fecal matter to determine how much of the starting nutritional content was literally just going out the other end.

This raised a lot of questions for me: I don't think Pop-Tarts are analyzed by confining a human volunteer to a small room and feeding them only Pop-Tarts, then doing lab tests on their poop. Does that mean we know even less about feeding humans than we do animals? At any rate, nutrition labels would have to be rough estimates to begin with, and then accounting for the variability in the way bodies process food, it's even less descriptive.

Now i'm in plant agriculture, and I'm learning about the different types of proteins and fats and what plants and/or animals they come from. There are different types of protein with different sources. There are...nine? I think? different amino acids that have to be consumed in the diet, and different foods contain different ones?? The reason combinations of grains and legumes are so common as staple diets throughout the world, is that this is closest to being nutritionally complete for humans???

And also protein supplements are mostly useless unless you're an Olympian or something, because the body doesn't have a way to store protein for later. If you eat protein and your body doesn't have an immediate use for it, it just gets taken apart in your liver and you pee it out. Sports greatly increase your need for energy far more than they increase your need for protein, but everyone thinks you should eat a ton of protein as an athlete and that carbohydrates are unhealthy.

I learned from the same chapter WHY fiber is important to help digestion (having texture to the stuff in your gut stimulates peristalsis which is the muscular movements that push things along).

I feel really weird and resentful about health textbooks and classes now, because it feels like they didn't want us to have the facts on how our bodies work, and instead just taught us to see certain foods as "good" or "bad," as though it was more important to be afraid of "unhealthy" food than to understand why food is needed. Health classes barely teach why food is needed.

Like, vegetables are seen as the quintessential "healthy" food, but what is traditionally seen as "vegetables" are mainly important because they provide micronutrients, fiber, and water (the water content in food is actually a big deal). There's a reason they aren't staple foods. You need carbohydrates and fats to live. Period.

I say "what is traditionally seen as vegetables" because it's an incoherent category nutritionally. Beans, sweet potatoes, and spinach are doing very different things for your body. Are beans even a vegetable? Clearly "comes from a plant" isn't the main criteria since grains, nuts, and fruits aren't considered vegetables.

So like, the "myplate" graphic (and the "food pyramid" that came before it)? Total bullshit basically.

It's really frustrating how writings on healthy eating assume you are probably already eating too much or are at risk of overeating. I learned very young about the harms of being "overweight" and eating too much of a certain nutrient. But I just realized from my reading in the plant agriculture class that I had never read a resource that teaches in the same detail about the harms of undernutrition.

It's so easy to fail to get the nutrients you need, holy shit. Particularly protein, because it isn't one thing, it's a bunch of different types of molecule pieces that are found in varying amounts in different foods. People who eat animal products or soy don't have to worry about it very much, since they are essentially complete in terms of protein, but if you are a vegan who doesn't/can't eat soy as a staple, you HAVE to be careful to eat a variety of foods that complement each other in terms of what they're lacking. There's something called the PDCAAS that rates each food by the amino acids they contain, but generally the best idea is to eat a bunch of grains and legumes.

I'm not saying that people can be "scared straight" out of developing eating disorders. But I am saying that young people can benefit from being exposed to scary information when they have the power to possibly encounter situations where that information is applicable. And the horrifying realization of what starvation is and does is such an information.

My plant agriculture text explained that carbohydrates and fats are the basic sources of energy under normal circumstances, and that it takes around 1,600 kcal per day to run your internal organs. Protein is only used for energy in unusual circumstances. When fat reserves are exhausted and there isn't any food, the body starts breaking down proteins for calories—and the first ones to go are the ones that are already all throughout the bloodstream, found in YOUR ANTIBODIES. That's right, when you run out of fat to burn off, your body starts EATING ITS OWN IMMUNE SYSTEM.

The plant agriculture book also says that digestion and energy needs vary from person to person, like literally when different people eat the same meal their blood sugar rises different amounts, and that how the body decides to store energy or use energy stores is determined by complicated feedback loops controlled by hormones. Meanwhile the average person thinks that it's a matter of "eat too much = get fat and unhealthy, eat less = lose weight and be healthier" and even the college health class I took used more or less this model.

Like people are walking around with this completely wrong idea of how their bodies work and making AWFUL decisions based upon it because the resources they have to educate them think it's more important to...make people afraid of food? I don't think it's even common knowledge that the body burns most of the calories you consume just from existing. I want to chew concrete.

Why don't we teach everyone in school why staple foods are staple foods?! Not even getting into people who are so deep into eating disorders they think carrots have too much sugar, it's so normal to do things like "cut out bread" or "cut out carbs" (????!??!) and to perceive hunger as an innately untrustworthy thing, when genuine success at dieting like this is a great way to Corn On The Kill Yourself.

I'm just kind of reeling right now at how much research and monitoring it would take to safely diet in the ways people constantly attempt to diet with NO research NO supervision NO medical testing, 100% believing that they are doing something good for their health.

If people aren't taught what a macronutrient is and why you will die without it, they will think celery sticks are a "healthy" substitute for a chocolate chip cookie, and then not understand why they feel like shit.

Also... this is slightly different, but it's connected to the problem of "people not understanding what food does to the body". In the animal agriculture class, it was surprising to me how in livestock animals, things like muscle and fat composition are strongly genetically determined. All the modern breeds of cattle, pigs, chickens, etc. used in corporate farming have been bred to be very lean and have very little fat while having huge amounts of muscle tissue, because that's what the modern consumer wants in meat.

With pigs, a lot of older heritage pig breeds were bred to store most of what they ate as fat, because pigs were used to change food waste into lard that could be added to cooking for flavor and calories. And most of these breeds either went extinct or dwindled severely to be replaced by "meat" breed pigs that don't put on very much fat at all.

With humans, "everyone knows" that the amount of fat and muscle in your body comes from what you eat and how much you exercise. But a feedlot-finished beef cow that spends the last several months of its life doing nothing but gorging itself on carbohydrates will stay lean and put on muscle because it's genetically predisposed to.

to start every new year

grab your fluffy pen and notebook besties. this is our year! claim it! this year and beyond it’s a must that we gain confidence, have goals, ideas, self love and the will to bring our vision boards to life. i put together this guide to help keep myself on the right path and for you all to get inspiration to do the same ఇ

🎀 ⋆ ⟡ 𓂃 ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡ ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡ 𓂃 ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡

1 ) Attitude

pretty girl with a pretty attitude to match

making sure we have a positive attitude will always help us succeed in whatever we do. i know things can go wrong and can be discouraging but trying to look on the bright side and being optimistic will make life so much better. if something does go wrong, we have to try not to completely shut down, we should take a moment to process what happened, see if there’s a possible way to fix it, then do so.. and if there’s not we must feel whatever it is we are feeling (whether that’s sad, angry, frustrated etc), then eventually let go of that negative feeling, accept the outcome, then move on gracefully

this also applies to just everyday life situations. we don’t want to be known for having a nasty attitude in general. let’s try to check ourselves in the exact moment we realize that we’re being rude or bitchy. now i’m not saying be fake nice or anything like that because it’s normal to get an attitude at times, i know i do. i just mean we should be more mindful when speaking to others and try to consider their feelings as well

2 & 3 ) Affirmations and Manifestations

Affirming

it’s important to recite positive affirmations to yourself daily, truly believe what you’re saying and watch how beautiful life blooms for you.

some New Year affirmations to get us started

this year will be my best year yet

this year will be very luxurious for me

i am healing from my past

i have the power to create the life i desire

nothing can stop me from living the life of my dreams

this is my glow up year

i choose to love and accept myself unconditionally

i will be gentle and patient with myself this year

i will put in the work to make my vision board come to life

i will do things from here on out that will make my younger self proud and things that my future self will thank me for

Manifesting

bringing my desires to life

make a vision board with everything you desire (it’s not too late) ... it can be tangible : getting supplies you need at the store so you can hang it up in your room, it can be on Pinterest, it can even be in your notes.. however you want to do it, it’s up to you ෆ it’s the intent behind it that matters 🎀

manifest daily or weekly (have a journal and a pen for manifesting only)

Put In The Work : manifesting is all about strongly believing and knowing that you already have what you want but that doesn’t mean you should sit there and do nothing, you also have to have the will to make your visions come to life, work towards your goals and dreams.

4 ) Pretty On The Inside And Out

look good feel good. it’s time to get ourselves together girls, inside and out. no more putting things off, no more being lazy & no more being careless with how we come across and make others feel ♡

this year we are making our health a priority by eating better. let’s consume more fruit, more salads, more water etc .

let’s workout more often - go to the gym, try pilates, try yoga, try zumba etc

you can even romanticize working out so it can be a better experience for you. buy cute workout clothes , pieces that will motivate you to want to workout. buy cute workout necessities .. for example : pink yoga mats , pink water bottle , pink towel , pink dumbbells , pink bag to carry everything , bring your headphones to listen to your favorite music while working out

meditate !! life can be so stressful and it can take a toll on us mentally, physically and have us take our frustration out on others, so my suggestion would be to meditate regularly. meditation is a big part of my daily life. it helps me calm myself and makes me really relaxed. you can do it in silence or with some calming meditation music/sounds (i use meditation music mostly because it helps me concentrate

let’s work on our personalities - being a mean girl is so lame. let’s be more considerate, more generous, more thoughtful, more mindful, more caring, more compassionate. give compliments and give advice with good intentions.

keep our nails and toes done (and when i say done you don’t have to get acrylic & tips if you’re not into that, i mean keep your nails and toes clean & filed)

make healthy hair a priority

make clear skin a priority

dive into your personal style (see #8)

5 ) Journal Prompts

journaling is free therapy !!!

it’s important to start a new day, new week, new month and new year with journal prompts

journal prompts help us sort out how we feel

doing these help guide us on what we need to work on within ourselves and help us remain appreciative by writing down what we are grateful for regularly

each day or each journal entry write down one or three things you’re grateful for

each week write down 3 goals you want to accomplish

you can look up journal prompts on pinterest, make up your own or buy a journal with them already in there (i suggest having one of these because it’s so helpful and easy to get started if you don’t really know how)

journaling is a free form of therapy. i suggest journaling a lot because other than the fact that it’s very healing, some people don’t have others to talk to or they may not feel comfortable being so vulnerable with people, so journaling is a great alternative. it’s like your own personal therapy session 💗

when you’re sad, depressed, anxious, happy, overwhelmed, grateful etc ! writing down how you feel can help so much. even when you don’t know exactly how you’re feeling, just jot down any words that come to mind

here’s some of my New Year Journal Prompts

6 ) Beauty and BRAINS

learning never gets old. there’s always something new to learn and it’s always good to keep your mind sharp!

read more

listen to podcasts

search and look up things you’re interested in

be thirsty for knowledge even if you’re done with school

teach yourself something new! like a new hobby, sewing to make your own clothes, crocheting, painting, learn to do your own nails, learn to do your own hair .. the possibilities are endless

7 ) Cull Cull Cull

out with the old, in with the new

go through your following lists on all social media and unfollow accounts that’s not good for your mental health, accounts that don’t serve you in any way!

go through your emails and delete junk mail

go through your contact list and delete numbers you never call, block people who are toxic and even change your number if you feel like it will benefit you in the long run

unsubscribe from things that no longer serves purpose

go through your closet and get rid of everything you’re not wearing, everything that’s taking up space .. donate it all!

clean out your vanity/ makeup case! throw out all old makeup, clean your makeup brushes, clean your hair brushes (better yet buy new ones), wash your scrunchies and hair ties

8 ) Style

find your style this year! start buying pieces that you love!

what kind of clothing makes you feel good about yourself?

what are you comfortable wearing?

what makes you feel pretty?

play around with some things until you find what’s right for you ♡

buy timeliness pieces

do you like to wear color? neutrals? black and white?

be mindful when shopping

make sure everything you buy is something you love and something you want a part of your dream wardrobe

keep in mind, you do not have to break the bank to get cute outfits! you can thrift, you can go to places like Target, F21, find pieces on depop etc .. so don’t ever feel like you can’t be cute on a budget ♡

it’s time to stop living through others and live life ourselves! ♡

you can create a beautiful wardrobe just like your favorite influencer! you can do anything you want to do, start anywhere! even if you’re starting from scratch, one piece will eventually turn into lots of pieces and in no time you will have the closet of your dreams !

extra tips: here’s my post on how to find your aesthetic

9 ) Romanticizing life

it’s up to us to make our lives magical and worth living! romanticizing life is such a good way to do that.

ways to romanticize your life

use your best things! don’t wait for a “special” time to wear your favorite clothes or perfume, make everyday special

buy yourself flowers

take yourself on a date

play dress up with all of your pretty clothes

have tea using fancy teacups / tea kettle

use candles or fairy lights for cozy vibes instead of regular lights around the house

watch the sunrise / sunset

when you wake up comb your hair and put on something cute and comfy even if you are staying home

take yourself shopping and out to lunch regularly

get dolled up just to take pictures

find a spot under a tree and read

make your room your favorite place to be, your sanctuary <3

write love letters

explore a library or museum

take bubble baths regularly with candles, rose petals, crystals and soft music playing

do face masks and mani/pedis on yourself for an at home spa day

go to a coffee shop to journal

one by one replace all of your things until everything you own is pretty and aesthetic .. even little things

example : hair brush, combs, hand mirror, vitamin/pill case, water bottle, cookware, bath towels etc

10 ) Girl Power

there’s so many of us online who have similar tastes in things and seem cool and i’m sure you know someone in real life like this too and i know we can be shy or scared to approach people but we should make it a goal this year to be friendlier to one another

we should step out of our comfort zone and make friends with girls who seem cool to us

we should uplift eachother

we should give credit when credits due

be less messy

leave the drama behind

no more mean girl persona

you never know, you could meet your new best friend sometime this year 🤍

‧ ﾟ｡⋆ * ⋆. ౨ৎ ‧ ﾟ｡⋆ * ⋆. ౨ৎ ‧ ﾟ｡⋆ * ⋆. ౨ৎ ‧ ﾟ｡⋆ * ⋆. ౨ৎ

PSA: this is a timeless ItGirl Guide! even if you come across this mid 2024 and beyond, it still applies! yes it’s curated for a new year but it’s never too late to learn tips & tricks, it’s never too late to better yourself! this will be an active guide for years to come because i feel like i’m never going to be fully done with this, i’m always thinking of ways to improve, or tips i want to share, so i may add to this later or make this a series ෆ

i hope you all love this ItGirl Guide and can get some inspiration from it ♡ til later dolls, sending love always

They speak clearly, listen to you carefully, and are honest when they talk.

They understand and respect your personal space and limits.

They show they understand and care about your feelings and what you're going through.

You can count on them because they do what they say they will.

They know what they're feeling and handle their emotions well. They also understand how you feel.

They have their own hobbies, friends, and things they like to do.

They help you and are excited when good things happen to you.

They stay calm and solve problems without being mean or avoiding them.

You both like some of the same things and believe in similar ideas.

They admit when they make a mistake and don't blame others all the time.

They generally look on the bright side of life but are still realistic.

They are open to new ideas and want to keep getting better.

You feel happy and full of energy after spending time with them.

You don't have to act differently; you can be who you really are.

When you're with them, you don't worry and feel secure.

Emotionally healthy people are quitters. They make choices that align with their well being. Quitting a relationship, partnership or job that makes you unhappy is a sign of self awareness. If someone stays in something bad for too long, it's not because they're strong, but because they're afraid or have low self esteem. Being emotionally healthy means having awareness, setting boundaries, and knowing when it's time to move on from situations that no longer serve you. It's about prioritizing your mental and emotional health over sticking with something that's causing you harm or making you unhappy.

Emotionally healthy people also tend to have good communication skills. They express their feelings and needs calmly, openly and honestly. They also look for guidance and enlightenment because they understand that seeking help is a sign of strength not weakness.

They make decisions out of self love rather than attachment or fear. When you prioritize loving yourself, you make choices that align with your happiness and growth, rather than staying in situations out of comfort or insecurity.

Recognizing when you have an unhealthy attachment or that your feelings may not be conducive to your well being is important. It allows you to take a step back, evaluate the situation objectively, and make choices that are in line with your best interests.

Sometimes holding on can lead to more pain and struggle than necessary. It's a sign of emotional maturity to recognize when a situation is no longer good for you and to have the strength to let it go.

Things that are genuinely right for you should not cause you harm or emotional pain. Choosing pain is a sign of a lack of self love. Recognizing the need for change, prioritizing self love, and making healthier choices is how you begin to change your life.

You got to love yourself MORE than you love someone else.

If you do not get what you need from a relationship,

If you give more than you receive and it is not reciprocal --

You have no other choice but LEAVE.

You will feel lonely and sad but at the end it will be worth it

I will never stop yapping about how important it is to get your basics right. If your base routine is not solid, no matter what you add on to it, it will never be sustainable.

most of us get motivated in the middle of the night, build an elaborate routine that we’ll follow for less than 2 days and we’re back to square one.

I get so many asks about girls getting stressed over their routine and how they should solve the issue. If your routine is stressing you out, you need to cut. It. Down.

this is a pyramid that will teach you to get the basics down and in what order.

if your foundation is strong, your base routine will be an unshakeable of your life. if it is an unshakeable part of your life, you will slowly but surely get better at those things. as you get better at those things, your confidence will increase. as your confidence increases, you will be ready and motivated to take on more challenges.