I've always found it easier to make friends than to keep them.
People come and go. They switch majors or find new apartments, take jobs in different cities or jet off somewhere to reinvent themselves.
I would know something about that.
I want to keep in touch, of course.
Good luck in New York!
It was great working with you. Call me if you ever need anything!
A summer in Portugal? Wow!
I just…don't. But then:
1 NEW MESSAGE: RYAN BIO heyyyyy!!! how r u???
Huh.
Hi, Ryan! I'm doing well. It's been a minute. How are you? didnt think u saved my number lol. I did. We had a project together.
I didn't have to scroll up far to see our last conversation. It was rather one-sided.
yeh u helped me out. If by "helped" you mean did the whole thing for you. lmao no way ur still pissed about that? I mean, I remember it. I don't know if I'm "pissed." why u textin lik its an essay bro??? That's just how I type. ok smartypants lol!!! So…you were saying hi? yeh dude!!! u wanna catch up or somethin??? About what? i dunno. stuff. kinda had a ? 4 u. Okay. can i ft u? just got hom from gym. Sure, just give me a…
"Yo!"
"Hi…"
"Damn, dude, did you lose weight?"
"Yes. I don't want to" -
"Nice, dude, niiicccee!"
"Right. Well, you look…bigger?"
"Yeah, I got this whole new routine now. It's pretty fuckin' awesome, hahaha."
"You had a question for me?"
"Yeah. So, uh, how'd you know you liked dudes?"
"What?"
"I dunno. You like dudes, right?"
"Yeah."
"Okay…so, like, how do you know that, though?"
"Please don't say you have a crush on me."
"Nah, I don't. I'm just askin' for some advice." He paused and pressed his eyelids shut for a moment.
"I don't really know how you know," I said. "One day, I just knew. I mean, it took years for me to come out and say it."
"Ah, okay. 'Cus I'm tryin' some stuff…and, uh, it's hot. Like, hot hot. Not gonna lie, bro, it makes me pretty har" -
"Alright, I get the idea."
"Right…But yeah, it's fun. Makes me feel…good."
"What exactly is it?"
"I dunno what you call it. But, there's these guys who just…really like guys like me. Big, dumb" -
"Who says you're dumb?"
"Bro, you carried me through bio. You don't gotta be nice. It's cool." He laughed. "But, yeah, these guys like me. And…I like that, them likin' me, I mean. They tell me how big I'm gettin', and how dumb I look, and how I'm just a big, dumb, bro…" His cheeks reddened. "And it's not just that. 'Cus, like, they want me to keep goin'. Dudes are buying me gear and protein powder and shit. It's…cool. Really cool."
"Who are these guys?"
"I dunno. Just randos, I guess. Some of 'em are pretty chill, some not so much. But I don't really know 'em."
"Well, that's the internet for you."
"Umm…"
"Yeah?"
"Would you wanna tell me some of that…stuff?"
"Like what?"
"I dunno. Just…call me a big, dumb, bro."
"I don't want to yuck your yum, but…"
"Just once? You're, like, helping me explore my sectsuactually."
"It's sexuality."
"See what I mean? I'm dumb as fuck. Bro, please…just once?"
"You're a big, dumb, bro."
"I'm a big, dumb, bro. I'm your big, dumb, bro."
"...Where did that come from?"
"I…dunno." He blushed. "Umm…damn. Maybe I do got a crush on you?"
"Oh?"
He smiled. "Yeah, maybe I like seein' how smart you are. Makin' you do all the work while I'm just your big, dumb, bro."
"And this is all coming out now…because?"
"I dunno, dude. But, like, I wanna do it again. Talkin' to you. Talkin' about this. Maybe meetin' up?"
"In a way…I guess it was nice? Catching up, I mean."
"Yeah," Ryan said, his smile wider. "And we can do more than that."
















