The way Sam talked to Karli, gentle but firm, was so great on so many levels. She lashed out telling him to not be condescending to her, to not treat her like a kid, which I think ties in with how she has so much responsibility on her shoulders and probably had to grow up really fast, taking a mature stance and quickly assuming people will talk down on her or treat her like she's stupid or incompetent, a "child in adult shoes" if you will, and she fights against that, wanting and needing to be taken seriously.
The actress, Erin Kelleyman, is 22 herself, so if we suppose that Karli is too, she was around 16 or 17 when the Blip happened, and she had to fend for herself while the world was in ruins. In those years she was supposed to go to school and have friends, she stole the serum, used it on herself, lead a group and gathered supplies, and she took care of others while she was barely an adult herself.
And here's Sam, who's worked with soldiers with trauma before and who stands up for her despite of the things she did, who wants to help her and talk. He recognizes what she essentially is: a soldier with trauma.
He talks to her gently, but keeps his message out in the clear along with his intentions: I agree with your stance, but I can't get behind the killing, and I want you to stop. He doesn't sugar coat it but he doesn't confront her harshly either, keeping it nuanced and reasonable because he knows that while they see Karli as unreasonable, Karli sees them as unreasonable too, and Sam breaks that cycle by showing her that he's open for her side of the story, and in return Karli tries to explain it to him and show him what she means.
You can see her go along, you can see Karli genuinely following and processing the conversation and build this kind of trust with Sam, as she says later, "I trusted him".
Sam treats her gently because she's been through so much, but also firm and direct because of that same reason. She does know what she's talking about, which Sam knows, but he also knows she's just been through so much in such a vital part of her life that it's shaped her, and the serum probably had its hand in it as well (I think it amplified the anger and frustration she already felt).
And he was so close. He was so close to getting through to her. He knows about the building but he doesn't harshly pursue her for it because he understands that won't help right now, pushing for that won't make her understand, so he tries a different approach.
That scene was just amazing, and the way Sam was so open and kind and trying to make a joke, but still keeping to his stance really moved me. Anthony Mackie's performance just never stops to make me emotional in all the good ways. That man is amazing.
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