My Artworks・Reposts・Random

This account was made during times of intense stress, anything you see here shouldn't be taken as done during of sound mind.

I'm thinking I should keep everything as it is to showcase how I can be during a delusional state of mind, intense stress, anxiety and other mental health problems, either it be temporary or disordered, can lead to forming false ideas and beliefs. As stated, this can be a showcase of areas those false beliefs can lead to.

On top of that, stress induced involuntary age regression also contributed, it's a hard thing to explain.

I understand you cannot hurt cartoon and anime characters in fiction but I just wish that there was more choice in one's sexuality and romantic interests but God cannot take the paraphilia away as much I wish a divine entity of some kind could.

This story takes place about 2017, the end of winter, my mother had left after all the abusive shit she put my father, myself & my siblings through; weeks after she left I decided to try marijuana edibles to see if that would help with my case of autism spectrum but I wasn't diagnosed with it until the end of summer during huge forest fires in 2017 in my us state.

During times I first was being stoned I remember imagining to be as if things where like Legend of Zelda Majora's Mask, Majora's mask is fucking emotional & that will get your tears going if you keep yourself invested in the game world.

After months to weeks smoking cannabis I stopped for a couple of years completely off of it because my cousin was fucking with me every time I was smoking with it & it cause paranoia and pseudo psychosis or something; during those moments of smoking it I tried playing videogame (Overwatch) when stoned, I we're playing as Lucio while a little 8 year old one on the mic & then I got paranoid & got off the game & thought the FBI was going to go after me just because I was talking to him a little bit.

At age 12 I found things such as lolicon, shotacon & cubs so when I was getting stoned then my inhibition where getting lowered after 4, 5, 6 years of completely not viewing that lolicon, shotacon and cub stuff then have viewed cubs when stoned after many years of not viewing and that stuff marijuana can show you the truth of your own soul. You really have no choice in what you're attracted towards.

Legitimately (from what I've been told at least so take it with a grain of salt) the FBI had told my dad something & after being told that something I were given an autism diagnosis.

It hasn't been until recently I had got back into smoking cannabis aswell I try a bit of dab here and there.

If your attractions are confirmed to be disorderly then I please wish you luck, there are people out there with professional knowledge; people with profession and experience are out there who wish to help you out. I cannot promise that you'll be cured, there is no cure for anything like this but there are methods of coping.

There are other ways of dealing with this that doesn't involve ending yourself; suicide isn't the answer, you may think that is a good choice but I suggest weighing the options out, medical therapy and psychiatry would be the best option as means of help.

You're not a monster like what society will think you to be; the actions of some doesn't judge the actions of the individual. Keep yourself aware, keep yourself away from peer pressure and when you feel that you're in the wrong crowed then I suggest finding better friends.

You cannot convenience people of your view points either if they're pretty will established in their mindset, you cannot change the mind of a criminal; cannot change the mind of people of that nature, I am no criminal psychologist but what I know is that in their minds they don't see the acts as wrong.

You are the thinking individual, you have control who you associate with. I am autistic so my mind views things differently but I hope to give this advise to anyone without an autistic mind, those not affected by particular neurological developmental delays or disabilities aside from paraphilia.

They suggest that paraphilia is caused neurologically, the wiring of the brain being different from the typical outcome. A counselor cannot change the neurological parts of the mind, though autism cannot be cured either.

I understand that I am born the way that I am and I cannot change that, only can find ways to fit into society better.

https://neurosciencenews.com/mri-pedophile-brain-8548/

https://www.suicidestop.com/call_a_hotline.html

I haven't explored the dark web but there are some seriously fucked up people out there and you do not whatsoever have to be on the dark web to find these fucked up content, these fucked up Images and video's turned to gifs. I found a rather dead Discord group where fucked up people came in and where sending gore and I mean as an actual person was completely still alive when being tortured before his inevitable death; his face mutilated beyond repair, his hands completely cut off while he squirmed in his hellish demise.