The Bruce

this girl must have pussy like a pizza bc Everytime she fucks me I have little seizures

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

Do you think Michael Crichton had a deep-seated hatred of theme parks because he was too tall for all the rides?

Damn, it sure is huh

"I have been brought before the scriptures and my heresies found canonical" is an all-time banger line.

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

dude star wars is so good and/or bad and/or mediocre sometimes, depending

Ohh so that's why they called that one show Andor

devil may happy :)

Wouldn’t it’ve made more sense to to say devil may smile?

critique my post ever again and devil may angry

WARNING do NOT start reading books and comics or watching movies or looking at art!!! you will start wanting to create art yourself. or god forbid. writing.

U can watch Star Wars so many times and it doesn’t prepare u for how dumb Star Wars is. For one thing I think we gloss over how kenobi (who has definitely been at the club. Please.) describes the mos eisley cantina as the worst most villainous place ever and then u get inside and it’s a pack of muppets vaping

the man who has witnessed a thousand bloody battles saying the airport bar is the worst place he’s been is based, actually