God I fucking miss you...

But you're no good for me.

But I fucking miss you!

It's been six months since you last touched me, yet I crave you just as much now...as I did then.

I hadn't laid next to someone like that...in almost 5 years.

I opened my home to you...my bed.

I didnt want a fucking roommate...

I wanted you.

I wanted to like me as much as you said you did...

You said you always did.

And you wanted to sleep next to someone you actually liked...

You said that I'm perfect.

YOU SAID IT A HUNDRED TIMES!

Each one made my heart flutter... because I believed you...

You said no one had ever touched you the way I did...

I loved caressing your body with my fingers.

I loved learning your scars and every "imperfection" that belonged to you.

And you said you never had someone giggle...

After being slapped across the face...

I had only wished you would have done it harder...

But let's be honest here...

It only took one week and you started getting distant.

I couldn't even handle you sleeping on the other side of my bed...holding a pillow...instead of me...

And then the disappearing...

The lies about where you'd been...

Then the money...I have forgiven you about the money...but it still doenst change the fact...

You approached me...

You asked me...

You filled my head with ideas

And I sat next to you and cried to you that I was so fucking scared...

You held me close and joked about gross human emotions and made me laugh.

I was vulnerable that night and I thought I was safe...

It wasn't until you were arrested for driving with no license that everything made sense.

I lived right down the road from your job...

You started sleeping on the couch.

Disappeared for days...

Claiming you were at work?

I guess you didnt think I'd notice you took things with you...

So it gave it away you planned on being gone...

Not answering phone calls.

Yup. I was fucking done.

You were like a storm that came out of nowhere.

I tried to bring you into my peace and all you did was bring me into your chaos.

.......even tho you said coming home to me was peaceful.

Damnit Joe...

I just wanted to treat you good.

Treat you good.

Feed you good.

And fuck you good.

But all you did was fuck with my head...

But even after all that....

I fucking want you.

I miss you.

I want to call me a good girl...

I wanted to be your good girl....