Recovering Hetalian

Shidou: I’m gonna steal Sae.

“I want a threesome right now except it’s one man giving me a foot massage and one man cooking me a meal and both aren’t talking becuase my current audiobook is playing over the house speakers. They both leave when my food has been plated and my wine poured. I smile warmly and nod with appreciation as they let themselves out.”

“That was . . . disgusting. I only ate it so it wouldn’t be on the earth anymore . . . Because food like that deserves to be in heaven with the angels . . . because it tasted like a dead piece of shit.”

Rin: Don't sit on my bed with your outside clothes on.

Bystander: Oh you poor thing.

Rin: Why are you looking at me like that?

Yuuji, walking into he and Megumi’s bedroom drunk: You seem like a really cute guy, but I have a boyfriend.

Shidou: Damn, no wonder your brother hates you.

Chigiri: Sorry I’m a bit distracted today. Had some sex last night that rivaled any fanfic boyfriend and I’m not fully grounded yet. Give me like 3-4 business days and I’ll be present again.