TechBeck

If there are trees you aren’t alone

I can’t tell if this is supposed to be encouragement or an ominous warning

#that’s entirely up to the trees

One time I was in Argentina and I was so tired of trying to speak Spanish because I’m not very good at it lmao so I broke into exasperated English and the retail seller girl quickly understood me and engaged me in conversation. We talked for a while, she introduced me to a makeup brand, and then I decided to buy it. While she was packaging the purchase, she asked me if I were from the US or perhaps the UK and I just said “oh no I’m Brazilian hahah” and she looked me straight in the eyes and said, in clear Portuguese, “I’m Brazilian too”

When my dad went to China on a work trip, his Mandarin speaking wasn’t great but his listening was fine (his first language is Cantonese) and he encountered a German guy who had moved to China to work. My dad knew how to speak German because he studied it in university (but wasn’t great when it came to listening to new vocab he hadn’t studied before), and the German guy knew Mandarin because he lived and worked in China, so they had a conversation where my dad spoke to the German guy in German and the guy responded in Mandarin. I’m sure it confused a lot of their coworkers who just saw the Asian guy speaking German and the white guy speaking Mandarin.

Some years ago, I worked for a manufacturing company that had a service depot in China.  One of the engineers from the main office here in the US spent most of his time at the depot.  The problem was that he didn’t speak *any* of the various Chinese languages, and no one at the depot spoke any English. They all, however, spoke Spanish.

it fucken WIMDY

ever since i first saw this post, “it fucken WIMDY” is easily one of the top ten most commonly used phrases in my household.

My job is done.

Gender? You know that’s not real right? They just made it up to sell more pink and blue explosives to Americans

How we greet friends now

i’m gonna make a movie where two normal ladies fall in love. everything’s chill, no age gap, they’re both out of the closet, their families love them, everything’s fine. the catch is that one lady has a cat and the other lady never figured out what the cat’s name was cause the Owner Lesbian ALWAYS uses a dumb nickname and now it’s been three years and they’re getting married and it’s too late to just ask

It’s garnering more and more urgency because the cat’s importance is growing (the cat is going to be the ring bearer, oh no!)

The First Lady asks her fiancé if they should get a fancy collar with the cats name for the wedding and her fiancé throws her arms around her and says “great, would you go do that tomorrow?”

the longer i think about it the more that sounds like a valid conflict to base an entire movie around and the fewer problems i could think of that cant have a solid writing solution available

This is so good. Plus it’s not like you can try out likely names and see if the cat responds, like a dog might. It’s a cat. It’s just gonna sit and squint unblinkingly at you regardless, no matter how many names you try.

Y E S