#witless

Thing 33

In Thing 30 I highlighted Oliver Dowden’s anti-woke stance, a stance that has been heavily criticised by members of his own party.

“Conservative chair Oliver Dowden criticised for party’s ‘anti-woke rhetoric’ and ‘draconian’ legislation by Tory members”. (Independent:05/10/21)

But I don’t know if we should fear this man or feel sorry for him. The Guardian (09/07/20) has described him as “not particularly bright.” And the MailOnline (13/05/22) tells us:

“Oliver Dowden left red-faced as champagne bottle signed by Boris Johnson is sold as a 'souvenir of Partygate' after he donated it to a charity auction."

The advertisement for this particular auction lot read as follows:

“Bottle of Champagne signed by Boris Johnson

A bottle of champagne signed by Prime Minister Boris. Hugely valuable as a souvenir of partygate and the exemplary behaviour and morality of our dear leader”

Donated by Oliver Dowden”

Such a description was clearly an embarrassment for Oliver Dowden, who was heavily criticised by opposition MP’s and forced to reject the suggestion he was responsible for the catalogue caption.

Poor Oliver – red faced and embarrassed. But the ineptitude of this "not particularly bright" cabinet member is best exemplified by this diary entry by Sasha Swire in March 2017 in her book ‘Diary of an MP’s Wife':

“Oliver Dowden, in lobby, tells H he is so sick of his wife’s vegan cooking he was absolutely delighted when he came home and finally saw a ham and chicken bake in the fridge. He gobbled it down lustily. When his wife came back, she asked him where the dog's food had gone.”

End of Year Fic Writer Asks

It's so hard to answer this because my fics are not apples-to-apples. Like I adore writing the forces of attraction fics because they feel so different from everything else, but borderline had such a massive sense of accomplishment with it. And keep the car running was such an insane experience of writing something that made me so emotional and was such a labor of love. But then there's some smut one shots that were so fun and just poured out of me. Like how do I choose!