#wisdom needed

College, it’s a terrifying new environment but one of the best times of people’s lives. I was tossed into the world of college feeling so unprepared. For in High School it wasn’t too hard to make friends and find a group to fit in. Then you felt that of sense you belonged and fit in. But college, personally for me, it’s a jungle where I am that species where I can live in the certain environment but still struggling to survive and thrive. 

This isn’t some open letter or essay here. I just have question which I know I could get some answers from this lovely website of diverse people. But before I put my question out here...I need to explain the environment I am trying to survive in.

I am Freshman who’s in this “bridge” program where you go to a community college in the area for a year then will transfer to the major university in the area for Sophomore year. Loads of people from high school go to the community college and the major university. Equaling constantly seeing people I know on both campuses or even at times no one which is nice. Oh, yeah I live in the town where these colleges are so I know where everything is already.  Also, my father works at the major university so I’ve got my parents right here if I need anything. 

My best friend is also in this “bridge” with me and so we are always hanging out with one another. Yet I see my other friends at the main college having/making all these new friends from their classes, activities, or however one randomly become friends. First off, I absolutely love my best friend, and cannot forget my roommates whom are crazy but I love...yet I honestly don’t have those new college friends that everyone around me is making. No one is all that friendly in my classes to the point at the end of first semester we all don’t know each other’s name still. I made one new great friend in one of my classes but she transferred away so I back to square one.

So, my question is to all you users out there is, does it get better once you make it to Sophomore year and getting to the major university (if you have transferred before)? I guess what I am trying to say is I feel like I don’t fit in and I am not meant to be here where I am now. But some people have told me, “Oh wait till you transfer and then you’ll find that group of friends.” or “Just focus on school right now as you don’t need to worrying about that now.”. But I hate that uncertainty and unhappiness it brings me now. I feel as though I am a porcupine who looks like a normal gerbil among other gerbils but my spikes are invisible yet they can sense them so I am unapproachable or something. Hopefully that made sense any who, I constantly roll the idea around in my head, “Am I meant to be here? Did I make a mistake? What is wrong with me to make me unapproachable? What is wrong with me!”. 

off for now, watching limitless and drinking tea as well as visiting one of my friends who's foot has been injured