#vorstag

She did not know what she did to me. She was my light. She was my friend. She was with another. 

He traveled with us, and love wasn't something that belonged in war and such. But he chose to come with us to help. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but I shouldn’t have accepted him so easily. We were fine before him. We had synergy that kept us protected. She wasn’t mine, but I could feel that she felt something too.

Months on the road and doing what we could in the crisis kept us alone and away from society. She tried to keep the feelings mutual. But I could tell what he was doing. I could see that he looked at her. I could see how he would touch her, patting her shoulder and even giving her hugs to calm her during the storms. Anything he could to get close to her.

I tried my best to keep her focused. I promised myself I would wait until it was safe to confess my love for her. She didn’t need distractions. She was the Dragonborn with the world on her shoulders. I wasn’t about to add to her worries. But he overstepped his welcome with me.

He took her aside and kissed her. He held her in his arms, and she didn’t fight it. She let him do it. I so badly wanted to rush for her. To stand between her and this heathen that decided he could do what he wanted. Her laugh is what stopped me. Her smile and the adoration in her eyes kept me from rushing to her.

They did try to keep it a secret, but eventually they got sloppy. Even if I didn’t know from the start, it wasn’t difficult to figure out. I was caught in a wave of despair, confusion and heartbreak. I was caught between being her supportive friend and a furious interest. But I knew that I couldn’t live without her in my life.

Somehow I would have to make it through their moments of love. Holding hands along the roads. Kissing each other before a mission. Sleeping in each other’s arms. My chest burned each time I saw them. I had no solace. Only if I chose to abandon my nightly watch to leave them helpless, and I couldn’t do that. Not to her.