Horses have taught me a lot in life. From the time I was younger I was handling beasts that were 10 times my weight. I learned how to control beasts that could easily have trampled me from the age of 5 years old. Pain became familiar, physical and emotional. I watched death firsthand at 12 years old, saying goodbye to our beloved broodmare who was finally at peace at 36 years young. I got up the next day and went to a Pony Club rating, passing my D1 and D2 with ease. I learned how blood feels when itās dripping down your hands at 13, when the horse of my dreams came home from the racetrack with a completely severed tendon. My heart learned how to beat for something else as I watched him decline, almost losing him on multiple occasions. Two years later he was finally able to be turned out with a bandage on. Today he is finally getting well enough to seem almost sound. He will never be sound to ride. Iāve been humbled more times than not, Iāve flown over 3ā²6ā³ overs on horses older than myself, and Iāve taught my own young OTTB what to do over cross country fences. Iāve made exponential progress and Iāve seen rapid lapses of knowledge. Iāve met goals months before time, and Iāve completely changed them when things happen. Iāve handled $250,000 horses and horses who should be dead. Iāve fought with owners over injuries and ridden horses fresh off stall rest based on orders. Iāve ridden (and fallen from) many bucks. Iāve feared water complexes and Iāve overcome it. Iāve lost count of my falls, and Iāve hung up ribbons on my walls. My bedroom is a mess of pictures and ribbons of all different colors. Iāve been sitting on a horse when they freaked out and went in a bucking fit, and Iāve ridden a horse that was supposed to be crazy. Iāve felt what a neurological horse does when they have a spell, and Iāve felt what an Intermediate Eventer feels like in a half pass. Iāve had the highs and the lows, Iāve almost quit riding altogether, and Iāve had my passion for riding rekindled when I was at my lowest lows. Iām 17 and crazy, battling hormones and myself as I try toĀ āfind myselfā. Iām not sure whereĀ Iād be without horses, but I know that they've saved me a lot of heartache. Where other 17 year old girls are smoking pot and drinking on the weekends, sleeping with a new guy every night, Iām waking up early to feed creatures that donāt speak my language, Iām riding a young horse who can jump the moon but doesnāt know what a trot is, and Iām battling whiplash after failing to ride my first rear.
I donāt know what Iād do without horses, but I know that Iām grateful for the skillsĀ theyāve taught me. I donāt take bull from anyone, and Iām a very direct person. I know that youāll never receive if you donāt ask, and that when you make a mistake you must pay for it. Iām nowhere near perfect, but Iām doing the my best most days. Lessons are hard to learn in life, but if thereās one that I know well- itās that Iāll always love the feeling of running cross country just as much as anyone else. Iāll always look in the eyes of a Thoroughbred and see myself. And Iāll always be grateful for the people and horses who have made me who I am today.