#unawarewolf

Here I Go Again

Well, I’ve done it to myself once again. I don’t know why I can’t turn it off or resist it. After my meeting with the pastor, wherein he had blessed me with a healing prayer, I was feeling really good Physically as well as Spiritually, I stopped and picked up some groceries (fruit & poke), and then returned home in high spirits. Then my Momp texted my sister, brother, and I. It was something nondescript about lost/found government documents, but I unread it and it seemed to indicate that they would be all joining up to escape the coming apocalypse but would not be bringing me along for the ride. So I hastily tried to encode an SMS back asking if I could go too. I went walkabout and drifted into the social Interweb to see if there were more clues, and everything seemed to indicate that the end of days was indeed to be nigh, if not tonight. But, I was receiving encouraging words for a change, so I stopped to wish chef a happy birthday, and then once again hurried back home to get Tiger and pack so as to be ready to go. Checking in on noti’s, it seemed like the elusive rollya’ghostya gang was going to be out en force as well and were looking forward to a reunion. And so, once again, my ever trusting and hopefu heart had convinced myself that I was finally going to meet up with you and everyone and it was all going to work out. I stopped what I was doing (packing a suitcase to be prepared), showered and shaved (in pretty good time too), got dolled up this time so I would be presentable for meeting people (that’s how much I had convinced myself), and then…in typical fashion nothing but a slowly saturating realization of — nothing. I stumbled upon your 42517 5318 Fb and saw that you had completely severed ties with 356712 1257420 (maybe I’m projecting, but I took that as me) some 9 hours earlier. Then I watched the first two episodes of 7107 Future, knocked on another neighbors door to no avail, which leads me to… now where I am in the darkness with no direction, aimlessly walking down the only road I’ve ever known… like a drifter, I was born to walk alone {thank you, Whitesnake}. So for those keeping track, that’s three times today I deluded myself into a full top-off of confident hopefulness only to have it almost immediately leeched right out of me. F?<# demons, I can torment and torture myself way better than those candy-a$&es.

[Scene: we're discussing some chores I want done in the morning...]

Luke: [age 16] "We could do that later when you're out."

Beth: [age 12] "Yeah, they're not really urgent."

Me: "Hmmm. I don't want to put that responsibility on you."

Luke: "I'd rather do it later than now."

Me: "I'm concerned that it won't get done if you don't do it now."

Luke: "Come on, we do all sorts of things when you're not here."

Beth: "Yeah. How come you don't trust us to get chores done when you're not around?"

Me: "History, maybe?"

Luke: "You have no idea what happens when you're not here."

Me: "Oh? Care to enlighten me?"

Luke: [goofy] "Oh yeah. We grow fangs and claws and we get furry all over, and we don't even notice."

Me: "So... you're a clueless werewolf when I'm gone?"

Luke: "Exactly. I'm an unawarewolf."

Me: "Do unawarewolves finish their chores?"

Luke: "No, they're busy doing unawarewolf stuff."

Me: "I thought so. I'd like the chores done by noon."

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