#tortoiseshells

“It’s not so easy for me,” Henry said. Emma wasn’t the first girl he’d ever liked but she was the first he’d liked this much. It kind of floored him how much that much actually was.

“That’s because you won’t let it be,” Byron said. Shockingly, he let the chance to make a dirty comment about Henry being easy or hard pass right by.

“Emma’s parents run the place,” Henry said.

“But they’re never here,” Jed said. “Rarely. I mean, you’d think they’d be around more but they’re not. The supposed ghost of Camp Green Wood is here more than they are.”

“Fine. She knows I’m training to be a minister. That’s not a sexy profession,” Henry said. He didn’t regret it, but it was true.

“Yeah, ‘cause electrical engineer is super-hot,” Sam laughed. “And Foster’s made it clear he wants to be an orthopedic surgeon. Mary can’t get enough of his hip replacement pillow-talk. Tell me more about robot-assisted surgery, Jed, ooh, ooh talk trochanters to me…”

“Hey!” Jed interrupted.

“At least he was basically locked up with her, alone, with nothing to interrupt them,” Henry grumbled.

“Yeah, Byron’s visit was a real turn-on. I think you’re over-estimating the eroticism of the health-lodge,” Jed said. “And that exam table is like iron, the angles are terrible…”

“Oh my fucking God, stop! I like Mary and I need to be able to talk to at least one of you if I get sick or something,” Henry said. Jed made a fake-innocent face like What, what did I say? and Sam made one like Damn, Henry took the Lord’s name in vain, he’s gonna catch it with His boss and Byron just looked thoughtful, which was the most terrifying of all.

“Are you scared she’ll say no?” Byron asked. “Not to tell tales out of school, but I have it on good authority you’re in.”

“Anne thinks everyone is as… free as she is,” Henry said. Jed and Sam laughed. Anne was renowned for her sex-positivity and enjoyment of what she called “nature-baths” which featured Anne, her Union jack bikini bottom and a hammock she’d strung up between pine trees which were equidistant between the men and women’s cabins.

“Mary says so too,” Jed remarked.

“Charlotte sounded pretty certain,” Sam added.

“Don’t you guys have better things to talk about than Emma and me?” Henry snapped.

“You admit it! You and Emma are a thing,” Jed said. “Pay up, Hale!”

“No way! That doesn’t count. I’m not giving you twenty bucks for that,” Byron said.

“You were betting on us?” Henry asked.

“There, you can’t argue with that. ‘Emma and me’ and then he said ‘us,’ that’s a relationship,” Jed insisted.

“I bet on a hook-up, not semantics,” Hale said.

“You wouldn’t know semantics if they walked up and slapped you on the ass,” Jed said.

“Sam, come on. You didn’t bet, so you get to call it,” Byron said. Henry looked at Sam with gratitude and got a smile in return.

“What’s the point in betting on a sure thing?” Sam asked.

“Taking Hale’s money, that’s the point,” Jed laughed.

“You guys are shitty friends,” Henry said. He knew he sounded like a humorless jerk who was frustrated that they all had girlfriends or girl-friends-with-benefits and he didn’t have the confidence, the balls to ask out the prettiest, sweetest girl he’d ever met who didn’t seemed bored at all when he talked about hiking or theology school or his ranking of Pop-Tart flavors and metal bands.

“Relax, Hen. Once Byron coughs up the cash, I’ll buy us a round of glaciers and we can spike them with Byron’s vodka. A little Dutch courage and tonight could be your big night,” Jed offered.

“I’m not eating that strawberry crap you and Mary like,” Sam said. “I want green apple. Charlotte has the whole campfire set up planned.”

“And Sam and I learned like an entire hour of Emma’s favorite songs. The girl likes Broadway musicals is all I’m saying,” Jed said.

“And Annie and I are prepared to start up ‘Never Have I Ever’ if we have to,” Byron said.

“If you have to—what a load of BS,” Jed scoffed.

“Yeah, Byron, we know how you two have been gunning to get us playing that since the second week,” Sam said.

“That was before Mary sprained her ankle and got Jed to play doctor and Charlotte took you in hand, Sam. Annie and I thought it’d be the only way to get the party started, if you know what I mean,” Byron said, grimacing in a way he must have thought would read as sly or worldly. It looked like a bad Flynn Rider impression.

“I didn’t play doctor,” Jed interrupted. “I helped take care of her ankle and then, after, I asked. Like a gentleman. I didn’t literally jump her bones.”

“I know better than to argue with a smart woman,” Sam said serenely.

“You guys are going to embarrass me. And Emma,” Henry said.

“Yeah, then you can both walk off to the dock. It’s a full moon tonight, clear skies,” said Jed. “Romantic.”

“Boathouse is stocked with blankets, some pop, some candles and Creepy Frank managed to get the night off to take Emma’s sister to the Italian place a few towns over, so they won’t mess anything up,” Sam said.

“Jesus, what’s left for me to do?” Henry said.

“Hen, if you don’t know, we can’t help with that. Though Annie is always ready with some pointers,” Byron said. Jed laughed and Sam smiled.

“No, I’m good,” Henry said quickly. “Byron, give Jed the money. But skip the vodka. I don’t want to be drunk for this. I don’t want to miss a thing.”