Voyager does have a bad habit of making important things happen in alternate/illusory ways and then just... not explaining why they stick in reality (I'm thinking specifically of Janeway's haircut in "Year of Hell" and the Tom/B'Elanna wedding that was only actually shown in "Course:Oblivion" when it happened to their Silver Blood copies and not in "Drive" when it happened to their real versions). And I've often heard of Kes' breakup with Neelix in 3x10 "Warlord" mentioned in the same breath. Because she was possessed by an alien when she did it. And therefore it doesn't make sense that it sticks after he's gone.
But I actually think the decision to have Kes break up with Neelix when when she was possessed by and evil, tyrannical alien warlord and then have the breakup stick after she comes back into control of her own body is a fascinating choice?
Like, maybe before the possession, Kes felt like she couldn't leave. We know from canon (VOY 2x07 "Parturition") that Ocampa mate for life and there's no jealousy, infidelity (or presumably, divorce).
KES: On my homeworld it's so much simpler. You choose a mate for life. There's no distrust, no jealousy, no envy, no betrayal.
EMH: Hmm. Your world must have very dry literature.
The EMH called it "boring", but to me that's anything but. That sounds... miserable. 9 years isn't a long time, but if you're stuck with the wrong person, it can feel like an eternity.
And then, there's Kes' role on Voyager as the Nice One. Like, yes she's presumably seen breakups on the ship and knows that's something humans do, but she's always smoothing over conflicts and being non-confrontational. So maybe, in addition to all that cultural conditioning from growing up on Ocampa, she felt trapped by "I don't want to make anyone sad and breaking up with Neelix would make him sad."
Like maybe she felt uncomfortable and unpleasant and deep down wanted the relationship to end for months or even years. But she was just completely trapped by having to be the Nice One all the time, and by Ocampan culture that she couldn't figure out a way to end it.
And then along comes a bloodthirsty warlord to possess her brain. He isn't burdened by her cultural background, or the crippling need to be nice. And this warlord possessing her brain can literally feel all her built up discomfort and resentment and feelings of being trapped and is just like, "no, screw this, I'm ending this ridiculous relationship." Not necessarily because he's altruistic or anything. It's still mostly a selfish move to help him further his quest for power.
But then when Kes comes back to herself she's like... "wait... that was an OPTION? I could have broken up with him this whole time?" And so it sticks because really it's something she wanted all along. She just needed someone mean enough with actual boundaries to help her see that it was possible.
Like, yeah, I do wish we had gotten a scene were Not Possesed!Kes tells Neelix why she's going to keep them broken up. But even so, the implications of what we do have are fascinating.
