#thlestrals

~

Mcgonagall caught him shivering through the whole of Transfiguration, and though his teeth had rattled so much he was worried they’d fall out, he hadn’t mentioned any of it to her. She made sure to press the point that he should visit Madam Pomfrey if he was feeling unwell, but after minutes of silence let Sirius leave to find the others waiting outside. He strode straight to Remus, dropping his head onto his chest as the taller boy wrapped the shorter in his cloak. 

“I take it it went well then?” James teased, not expecting the elbow to the ribs he received from Peter. 

“What did she say?”

“She thinks I’m ill.”

“Well she’s not wrong.” Sirius lifted his head to scowl at Remus, the smirk on the other boy’s face just making him feel even worse. “C’mon, let’s go sit you in front of the Common Room fire like you’re our house cat.”

“I hate cats.”

“I know.”

~

“When are you going to tell me what’s really going on?” 

It had been hours since last light, and the four were still sat in front of the fire, with Sirius on the floor wrapped in as many blankets as they could scavenge and the others crammed on the sofa. Peter had tried to stay up and help keep Sirius warm, but had soon fallen asleep curled up next to Remus like a large dog who thinks they can fit in your lap. Until a few moments ago, Sirius was sure that Remus was still engrossed in his book, but as he glanced at him now he noticed the book had fallen into his lap, and his head was now gently resting atop Peter’s. Which left James, who was, as Sirius watched him now, very much awake, and staring down at him as if there was something he was supposed to say.

“What?”

“I know Moony’s noticed too, but I think he feels like he hasn’t got the right to say anything to you about acting weird cause he’s-” James stopped himself and glanced around, momentarily forgetting they weren’t in the private safety of their dorm room. “Well anyway, I do. And I need you to tell me what’s going on, cause this isn’t just your average winter of being cold, mate.”

Minutes of silence passed between them, Sirius chewed his lip until he was sure he was going to get an ulcer in the morning, but said nothing. James shook his head and moved as if he was about to wake up the boys when Sirius blurted out-

“It’s my mother.” He watched as James settled back down, eager to listen, he took a deep breath. “Over the summer I spent so much time away from home, not just when I was with you, some nights I just wouldn’t go home. And when I was home Walburga wouldn’t let me breathe for two seconds without screaming at me that I wasn’t loyal to the family, that I was a traitor and all that other shit. That’s why I went dark those last two weeks of break, Prongs. She wouldn’t let me leave the house, wouldn’t even let me send an owl. And I didn’t tell you because- I didn’t tell you cause I knew you’d come up with some scheme and- and I checked and your parents can’t adopt me unless the ‘House of Black’ agrees to it.” He made the air quotations with his hands, letting the blanket fall from his shoulders and watching it settle on the floor as he made no move to pick it up.

“Sirius I- shit, mate. You- the shivering, you’re that scared to go back?” 

Sirius nodded.

“Shit, right.” James scrambled down from the sofa to wrap his arms around his friend, he would’ve toppled him over if Sirius hadn’t squeezed so hard back. “Listen, Padfoot. Nothing’s gonna happen to you, alright? Even if we have to chain ourselves to this bloody castle no one is going to make you go back there. Me, you, the boys, maybe even the girls, we’ll all stay here for Christmas, you don’t even have to think about it. Okay?”

Sirius nodded against James’ shoulder, pulling back to smile at his friend, before they both burst out laughing at how their eyes had begun to water.

“Oh, fucking hell are you still up?” Their heads whipped round as they witnessed Peter rising from the sofa, stretching out his back and yawning loud enough to wake the whole castle. 

“Bloody hell, Pete.”

“What? Just cause I don’t swear as fucking much as you two doesn’t mean I never do. Now let’s go the fuck to bed.” He glanced down at the mass still on the sofa. “Can someone help me carry Remus? He’s one heavy bugger.”