Mother, I did the dishes:
Mother, I did the dishes
Scrubbed them clean
Until my hands reeked of nothing but soap and regret.
As if those shining plates
could guarantee your forgiveness
for every test i took and failed,
ones that i lost to helplessness of my young age.
Last night
Your voice crashed with the door of your room
opening and closing for 16-
no, 18 times.
Accusing voices of you and father
fighting a war older than me
yet, no flag waved in sight for twenty-five years.
You picked a cheater,
called him a human,
dressed him as your husband
in front of others,
fed him forgiveness and love,
gulping his lies down your throat
All that, just for the show.
But he was just infidelity in person
behind closed doors.
Mother, I needed someone to fight for me,
maybe, I needed you.
He kept betraying
and you kept forgetting,
choosing a monster over me,
the one, only you couldn't see.
You saved your marriage,
perhaps that is good,
perhaps that is what adults are supposed to do.
But mother-
I was just a child,
not a wife,
and i needed saving too.
-Gauri.
















