#tdor2013

#TDOR2013 throwback. Oh, the revelations had during this time. #WhyIRanOutOfPride #TRANSgressions (at Evergreen Health Services of WNY)

A girl and a guy switch clothes for Trans-awareness Day 

Debate does exist in the trans community about the reclamation of the word. Eg, prominent trans / “gender outlaw” advocate Kate Bornstein posits that it was originally used to create common ground between trans women and drag queens in Australia, and so is available for positive reclamation (http://katebornstein.typepad.com/kate_bornsteins_blog/2009/07/who-you-calling-a-tranny.html) Trans feminist blogger Quinnae Moongazer writes an articulate and heartfelt rejoinder, saying in part, “You are telling me, Kate, that I am not real, good enough, or even welcome because of my gender, and you condescendingly tell me and many of my sisters that our feelings about the word “tranny”- which are very complex- are invalid.” (http://quinnae.com/2010/11/17/an-open-letter-to-kate-bornstein/). However, the message that cis people like me really need to hear is this one: "If you aren’t trans, whatever your intentions, “tranny” will always sound like a hate word coming from your lips. […] This word belongs to trans female folks who want it and to nobody else. Since trans misogyny is still rampant in the world I’d like to suggest that the rest of us back off of “tranny” for a little while. Let those who have been victimized have some time and space to heal from this word, to interact with it, pick it up, play with it, drop it again, save it for later, or tattoo it on their god damn foreheads if they want. After all, it’s none of my business. " (http://carnalnation.com/content/58040/1067/t-word-taking-transphobic-slur) Let me share a real-life example of what RuPaul’s Drag Race did in the life of one trans woman:”i hate how American culture assumes trans women are drag queens. i hate when people who know or learn i am trans compare me to RuPaul, ask if I love his Drag Race show, or want to know where i perform.” (http://i-am-river.tumblr.com/post/66218034884/i-hate-how-american-culture-assumes-trans-women) I’ve seen RuPaul’s callousness towards trans women spread and cause damage first-hand. A cis friend of mine, a huge fan of RuPaul’s Drag Race, thought her fandom made her some sort of expert on gender and sexual minorities; and so, she referred to actress Laverne Cox as a “lady-man” directly in front of a woman she knew was trans; when I told her the word was offensive, she accused me of “gay soapboxing”.  She apparently felt that being asked to try to understand why terms like “lady-man” and “tranny” are hurtful to trans women is a huge imposition (larger than the oppression that trans people face, I guess?), and appeared to think that transsexuality was some sort of club from which she was being unfairly barred. Can I remind everybody that yesterday, November 20th, was the Transgender Day of Awareness — that sixteen trans people, mostly women, were brutally murdered in the US this year just for existing; worldwide, the number reported is 238. (http://www.transgenderdor.org/memorializing-2013 ; http://www.buzzfeed.com/lesterfeder/238-trans-people-murdered-worldwide-in-the-past-year ; http://www.transrespect-transphobia.org/uploads/downloads/2013/TMM-english/TvT-TMM-Tables-2008-12_EN.pdf) These lists are incomplete; for one thing, they don't count people who survived attacks, like the trans woman in DC who was stabbed 40 times this past July (http://www.washingtonblade.com/2013/06/23/transgender-woman-stabbed-repeatedly-in-d-c-attack/). Yes, drag queens are also victims of violence. (http://www.washingtonblade.com/2013/06/25/bystanders-cheer-as-two-women-attack-beat-dc-drag-performer/) And my point in this post is not that drag is inherently bad, or even mostly bad. I simply don’t have enough experience or exposure to make a call. Also, it's certainly possible to enjoy problematic things. Just don't claim RuPaul is some sort of champion of trans rights. The thing about the cavalier attitude of RuPaul and too many cis male crossdressers is that cis male drag queens can take off their costumes and go back to being cis men, and RuPaul can retreat to the safety of money and fame, and the trans women have to live 24/7 with whatever attitudes they’ve engendered in US pop culture consciousness. The debate over word use and the needs of disenfranchised groups takes a modicum of compassion and humility. And RuPaul’s attitude towards a slur that is constantly used to degrade and attack trans women — who transition not for glamor, uniqueness, or to be a superstar, but because it is medically necessary for them — shows none of that. Neither does Dan Savage's answer, as he glibly implies that "freedom for everyone" means making trans women put up and shut up, instead of understanding that "freedom for everyone" is impossible while cis straight men and trans women have astronomically unequal freedom from fear, poverty, and the ability to express opinions, or simply exist, without facing mockery, degradation, and threats of violence.

"I Remember" - a video poem screened at the Trans Day of Remembrance Event at the LGBT Center in NYC last night. Very moving, and features many trans women of color, with lines in both English and Spanish. 

My existence, perseverance, and personal activism is enough.

I met up with my brother today and we lit agarbatti in the community garden. we shared silence. and i could feel rage and sadness and heart heavy. it was a needed silence. I think about all of my people who were murdered at the hands of a system which upholds and supports such oppressive and sexist violence. I emphasize that this is violence (NOT "bullying"). And i think about my people who committed suicide or self harmed. And i think of my people who have been hurting and continue to hurt and carry scars.  I reflected on the movements that continue to carry on - for example,  the climate justice movement and I also find myself asking - WHERE are my people? Are they here? And if they are not, how come? Maybe because we need to rest our bodies or maybe because we don't feel safe or maybe because we are scared or because we don't have the energy & so many other reasons. I want us to reflect on this because when we are working towards building a movement with an anti - oppressive lens, we need to recognize what is missing and we need to tackle why. Today. We need to do this starting now. and we need to commit to do this everyday