#tdor

you will always have a home with us. you will always have a family with us.

and when you go, you will be remembered fondly; but we hope that you'll stay.

I love you. I'm so glad you're alive. keep being brave. joy is as relentless as grief.

Precious Arzuaga is expected to be sentenced Sept. 4 to life in prison without parole after admitting to charges including first-degree murder, kidnapping, aggravated sexual abuse, concealment of a human corpse, conspiracy, coercion and endangering the welfare of a child in connection with the death of Nordquist, a 24-year-old from Oakdale, Minnesota. [...] Arzuaga is one of seven people charged in the case. She admitted to being the one to conceal Nordquist's body after his killing, prosecutors said. [...] Kayla [Sam's sister] said she does not believe all the details of Sam’s abuse were revealed in court. "I feel like I was slapped in the face because I deserve the truth, my mom deserves the truth, the community deserves the truth, and I don't feel like we got all of what happened to Sam today," she said.

That night was spent begging my mom to let me stay up late so I could keep helping the people who were desperately trying to find out if this teenage trans girl was still alive. I lived just one state over from her in the conservative midwest. When I read her note all I could see was myself and my friends. Suicidal, Tumblr using, midwestern kids afraid of what their parents would do if they found out we were queer.

The confirmation of her death rocked us all pretty deeply. I don't think I had a single trans peer who didn't feel it at the time. I still feel it.

A Black trans woman killed for showing up as her true authentic self. She was only 24 years old.

(x)

Her case was the first federal trial for a hate crime based on the victim's gender identity.

Today is Transgender Day of Remembrance, a day to remember and mourn the transgender people who lost their lives to violence in the last year. Here is more info: https://glaad.org/tdor/

I’ve written long posts on facebook for TDoR in the last few years, but today I want to share three things.

1) a poem, dedicated to all of the trans people I know who have struggled so intensely with the impact of transphobia and all of the trans people who are feeling hopeless and terrified. You are not abandoned, you are a loved and valued part of our community, and we will fight for every last person.

2) a list of links to resources for trans people, far from exhaustive but hopefully useful to at least one person who sees this.

3) a short list of places for cis people to donate – I found a few GoFundMe campaigns for trans people who are fundraising for the surgeries they need to be at peace in their bodies or who are trying to escape dangerous or hostile situations, and most of them have very few or no donations at the time that I write this. I donate to trans peoples’ GoFundMes almost every time I hear the news of a trans person’s death, because the only thing I can do in response is try to give back to the trans community in some small way.