#tadfools

Shadowheart: Shar hates self-care, but a Shadowheart does take pride in her hair, and a Shadowheart who has learned to be kind to herself can indulge. Long, complicated hair routine, very specific water temperature, and a tendency toward long-ass depression showers. LOVES a bubble bath and will make a whole event of it with flower petals and candles just for her. Will bring a book with a little book tray and a glass of wine.

Astarion: Similarly complicated hair routine. Gotta hydrate the curls, and being dead does not do nice things to your hair. Less prone to standing there staring at nothing while the horrors set in, but prone to scrubbing too hard. Similarly fond of a bubble bath, although without the book or flowers, although he will fuck with an essential oil heater and likes to make his own blends.

Lae'zel: Queen of the 4 minute shower. She has been accused of not even waiting for the water to heat up, but she likes it blistering. Does not actually use 3-in-1, thank you. Having fairly short hair helps. She finds the other companions baffling. Would get bored in a bubble bath unless she had company (rubber duck counts).

Wyll: Sings. If someone called him on it, he would be embarrassed, the first time, for about a minute. Neither wildly efficient nor inclined to standing there for ages and ages and prefers to shower in the morning. Washing his hair is a chance to relax and take care of himself, although before he has his family back, it can be a bit melancholy. He has fallen asleep in the bath before. I feel like he'd love a bath bomb and he'd love the full romantic evening with candles and flowers and music.

Karlach: Please, please someone boil her. Once she gets her engine fixed all the way, she tries a cold shower just to remember what it feels like and keeps up a running commentary about how much it sucks while also not turning up the temperature. Absolutely loves sharing a shower with someone and will also sing. Should not attempt her little jig on wet tiles. May try anyway. Someone should introduce her to proper hair/skin care because if anyone is using 3-in-1, I'm sorry, it's Karlach. Genuinely cannot sit still for a bubble bath unless she has company to cuddle.

Gale: Voted Faerun's Most Likely to Relitigate Arguments in the Shower, Even if He Won Originally. Loves to pamper himself, canonically, loves a spa day, also canonically. You simply are not getting the bathroom back for a good hour, although not all that time involves running water. Plays around with different products and researches the living hell out of everything. Loves a long soak. The only person with a feline in their house to ever bathe in peace. Constantly torn between wanting a book with him when he has a bath and not wanting to get the pages steamy and damp, much less actually wet.

Minthara: Her ideal hair wash involves someone else doing it for her while also having the utmost certainty that the person will not attempt to murder her. If her partner washes her hair for her, she turns into a puddle. She has an incredibly specific lineup of products. If she shares, understand that she has bestowed upon you a great gift. More about bath salts than bubbles and could be persuaded to a sufficiently elegant bath bomb (it would not be a difficult check).

Halsin: Low-flow showerhead user. Hell, he might be the kind of person to turn the water off entirely when not soaking/rinsing out his hair... However, he is not immune to the "shower together to save water" line even though he KNOWS it doesn't work that way. He needs low-scent soaps/etc considering his heightened sense of smell. And listen, this man does not fit in a bathtub unless he goes somewhere special or finds a particularly large one. He made everyone floaty ducks, properly sealed against water damage, and he has one for himself that holds his soap.

Jaheira: Understands that having a chair in the shower is just being kind to yourself and proceeds accordingly. Will revisit arguments she had that day, but despite that has a quick and fairly simple routine. She needs the water pressure to pound the everloving hell out of her back. Loofa on a stick user. Like Wyll, she has fallen asleep in a bathtub, in part thanks to having and using a bath cushion. Truly, the expert on bath-based comfort.

How do they help Astarion with his renewed allergy to the sun?

What if they ALL went to Avernus with karlach?

Can they please sass wylls dad during dinner? Can they walk around Baldurs gate like his personal detail glaring at all the naysayers?

Imagine them all squeezing in a tiny room at Shadowheart's parents as they help them rebuild.

Visiting waterdeep and they all have a incredibly specific and themed room at Gales tower like it's a 2010 avengers tower fic.

And fuck it, I don't know how they make it work but they should all pull up on vlaakith in mf dragons, cheering laezel as she brings her False God down.

SO! It's no secret I love David Bowie - sometimes I just put on my a playlist of his entire discography and listen to it over the course of a couple days. Because I'm still deep in my BG3 brainrot - here's all the companions in the Modern AU (no appreciable differences to their cannon setting just modern trappings) rocking out and what I think their favorite Bowie Albums would be, with a few words that I think sum up some of the overall themes of those albums that match those characters (I also think they would each like the musical genre of the selected albums).

Astarion – Man Who Sold the World/Diamond Dogs (Glam Rock/Hard Rock) Decay, Defeat, Ennui

Wyll – Black Tie White Noise/"Heroes" (Art Rock/Jazz Rock/R&B/Soul) Love, Warmth, Triumph

Gale – The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars/Reality (Glam Rock/Proto-Punk/Pop) Stardom, Grief, Burnout

Shadowheart – Blackstar/Heathen (Jazz Rock/Experimental Rock) Crisis, Death, Acceptance (and faith/crisis thereof, of course)

Karlach – Let's Dance/Aladdin Sane (Hard Rock/Post-Disco/Dance Rock) Conflict, Service, Duty

Tav – Low/The Next Day (Electronica/Ambient/Art Rock) Resignation, Aggression, Solitude (These are also my TOP favorites since she's my character, but it's very hard to pick and I like his whole discography.)

Lae’zel – Earthling/Never Let Me Down (Industrial Rock/Jungle/Hard Rock) Alienation, Wonder, Curiosity

Minthara – Outside/The Buddha of Suburbia (Experimental/Industrial Rock/Avant-garde Jazz) Violence, Confusion, Horror

Halsin – Hours/Young Americans (R&B/Funk) Patience, Memory, Loneliness

Jaheria – Tonight/Hunky Dory (Dance/Art Rock/Pop Rock) Loyalty, Trust, Remembrance

Minsc – Lodger/David Bowie (New Wave/Music Hall/Baroque Pop) Head Trauma, Unease, Immaturity (I also just think the idea of him bopping around to ‘Love You 'Till Tuesday’ is very funny)

OBS: im not counting the method used in BG2EE where you can use Bodhi's Heart to revert Jaheira's/Viconia's/Aerie's/Anomen's vampirism.

The first one is True Resurrection. Now, of course, by the time the Tadfools can get a hold of this (by level 17), the whole thing with "the creature can only have been dead for 200 years" would make it a bit inconvenient. HOWEVER, Astarion isn't dead, he's UNdead. So they would have to kill him. A funny mental image, in my opinion. This would be the most certain way to revive him. (if you're going with Rules As Written, if you're spicy and like the Matt Mercer method, it could be less certain)

The second one is the Wish spell. Which is a very interesting spell, it would need a specific and clear wording to revive him. There's a chance it won't work. And there's a chance that the caster (most likely Gale) won't ever be able to cast the spell ever again.

The final one... comes from Elven High Magic. The only magic in DnD that can still go beyond level 9 even after Mystra's prohibition after Netheril's Fall. All of the spells are ritual and communal. It's quite thematically fitting, as Astarion is an Elf, but he never says anything about Elven culture in the game. It's Ye Olde Lore, like 2e (AD&D). Here's the spell in its entirety:

Gift of Life (Wizard Spell) This powerful high magic spell has an effect unlike any other. It restores undead creatures to life. Undead creatures are allowed a saving throw vs. death magic, but they can only make such a roll at a level equal to half their Hit Dice. An 18th-level lich, for example, would make a sav­ing throw vs. death magic as if it were actually a 9th-level wizard. If the undead creature fails its saving throw, it is immediately restored to life as it was just before its death, if it died by unnatural causes. It is restored to life as it was 10 years before its death if it died of old age or similar causes. The restored creature is stunned and incapable of any action for 1d4 turns as it slowly realizes what happened. The restored creature returns to life at an appropriate experience and Hit Die level, and with its original alignment and abilities. It will, however, be wearing the same clothes, and carry­ing whatever equipment (if any) that it did as an undead creature. This spell does not necessarily change the alignment of a creature that was originally evil, but the elves recount legends of wicked liches or vampires who were restored through this spell, repented their old lives, and changed alignment, dedicating themselves to the defense of elves. The material component of this spell is a gold medallion in the form of the sun (worth at least 500 gp). Notes: Restricted to elves able to cast High Magic, such as those of Evermeet.

And here's an interesting alternative, based on the D&D Elven High Magic from angelfire.com:

Suyoll/The Revival: This ritual restores an elf's life, health, and harmony with the Weave. This is seen as an acceptance back into the community of elves, despite any changes that occur during the elf’s life (or death). This ritual restores an elf’s natural state, neutralizing all ill or unnatural effects upon him. It cancels curses of any nature other than those divinely placed (i.e., personally inflicted by a god) and spell effects such as petrification and polymorph. Suyoll allows the regrowth of full limbs, muscles, and organs (such as eyes, tongue, etc.). It also negates any magical or non-voluntary alignment changes. The most advanced form of this ritual involves the restoration of undead elves to a living state, as they were 100 years before their deaths or transformations. GM’s Note: This ritual is rarely used; for the elves are a stubborn lot and forgiveness is not a virtue they practice often. Thus, any outcast elf or seriously injured elf is often perceived as pitiful or as a fool who learned his lesson for straying away from the path of elvenkind. However, great sacrifices made for sake of a clan or kingdoms are looked upon proudly, and the Suyoll is invoked to honour heroes who act in such interests. This ritual can even restore a Drow to status among the Tel`Quessir, though the ritual erases all powers (but not appearance) of the Drow (judge as a moon elf).

It's so fun, it's so fun, this circus is great

New Shop Things! Pobody's Nerfect 1: Tadfools

A new series I've been messing around with: Pobody's Nerfect with our fav disasters from a number of things I've been enjoying recently! Here's the first group! ^_^

A few ways to enjoy it, check out more here! https://artofelainetipping.threadless.com