#swyvers

Let’s get this out of the way at the top: “swyve” means “to fuck.” So, swyvers are fuckers. Another meaning of swyve, or swive, is to reap, as in crops and harvest. This is likely the proper definition that lends itself to the metaphorical slang (I’m no farmer, but it seems like reaping is at least in the same neighborhood as ploughing). Swyvers (2024) is indeed a game about fuckers, but more of the “fuck you over” type rather than the copulating sort, though I won’t rule anything out. Thus, these fuckers actually hew to the less obscene definition, by harvesting wealth they don’t actually own. It’s a game about thieving. It’s set in a sort of fantasy late-medieval London, dirty, impoverished, violent.

The rules are light. So light that the book doesn’t bother with them until you’ve flipped through 20-ish delightful pages of stage-setting tables (including an exhaustive one dedicated to prosthetics) following the two pages of character creation rules. This is a clear indicator that the game is vibes-first, something emphasized by the tone of the prose (which makes me want to check that I still have my wallet) and David Hoskins’ wonderfully seedy art work. It is a genuine mystery to me how his line work depicting such grime can remain so elegant and clean.

To do things, a Skill system is employed (and modified depending on what a given character might know, guess, or bullshit). When things happen that a player’d rather not have happen, saves are deployed. It’s very savesy, I think. Combat is desperate. The game seems intentional arranged around preposterous and violent things happening. There is a delightful vein of humor in the writing — having that, and having it be so entertaining, really underscores how dour most RPG rulebooks tend to be.

Swyvers is not a dungeoncrawling game, its about heists, but the heists are constructed in a way that just, they are dungeons in their way. The tables, the fast and loose rules, this is a game meant to be constructed on the fly and I think it will work rather nicely once everyone gets the vibe, though I do wish it were a little better organized — I get lost in the highly orderly OSE tome, so this book winds up being surprisingly maze-like when you need a thing. I suppose the counter is to not need anything, which, fair.

By Luke Gearing, David Hoskins, and the Melsonian Arts Council

A game centered around a gang of criminals in a crowded, London-esque slum known as The Smoke and The Midden, the dark ruins underneath. Rules are light-weight, progression is focused on accumulating wealth, fencing, and spending it. Lethality is high and magic is rare and unpredictable. The rulebook provides many tables and systems for simulating a grimy, poverty-ridden city in the imperial core.

Swyvers is a light-weight set of rules married to a full set of tools and tables for running a game in the chaotic sprawl of The Smoke, its many districts and The Midden. What a city it is — corrupt officials, looming war, rogue sorcerors, monsters below and nobs above. Violence rests as thick as the smog, nothing is sacred and it’s always bloody raining. 

Swyvers is a game about bastards. You and your gang of criminals scarper through heists and sewers, stalk through the filth of The Smoke and, if you’re lucky, you’ll make it out with a few extra shillings. The whole of this city is your filthy, sickly oyster. 

Player characters are not heroes, they are not saving the world, they are trying to dodge the gallows in as much comfort as they can while giving the two fingered salute to the Crown. But hey, robbing the rich never hurt anyone, right?

This 'n That

Rules and lists of all the tools, weapons, lodgings, dodgy business investments, and hired goons any self-respecting Swyver should be familiar with.

Rules for dogs of all cut and calibre.

Death and dismemberment!

How to have a proper funeral for your mates.

'Orrible diseases.

Bloodsucking aristocrats.

Accurate time keeping records.

How to spend your spoils on carousing for XP.

Getting into deep trouble for your wild nights out, including gambling debts, dogfighting, and jealous lovers.

Take on apprentice Swyvers (Putterers), lead them on heists, and train them to take your place in the event of your inevitable sticky end.

Fences: who they are and how they'll profit from your terrible life choices.

Rules for bribes, leverage and blackmail!

A system for attracting the attention of Knotland Yard, who will, over many sessions, form a case against you and put a stop to your wicked ways.

A complete selection of terrible adversaries including agents of the church, ghouls, hussars, vampires, average humans, and bears.

... and complete rules on generating your own city of 'The Smoke'

The Smoke is the greatest city in the world, the beating heart of an empire. It is filthy and sprawling like a burst pustule left open to weep besides the iron-grey sea. It does have a name, but only the nobs and learned-readers know it. Beneath slumbers The Midden – the interconnected passages of built-over streets, basements, tombs and hidden lairs where criminals lurk, beasts squat and lost wealth resides. An enterprising fellow with a sledgehammer can traverse in any direction they please – not that they’ll like what they find. It is rife with corpse-thieves, cellar-breakers and enterprising businessmen shunned in sunlit places. The rich of The Smoke honour their dead with elaborate crypts, whose morose edifices encroach ever further into the slums – the trap-smiths of The Smoke do fine business from their craft, and the fences keep the money flowing thanks to enterprising tomb robbers.

Every group of Swyvers will have their very own Smoke. The GM starts a campaign by generating the city, starting from a core of districts: the Royal Gaol, the Palace, the Mayoral District and the Docks. From there they follow along Swyvers' generation tables to flesh out and, potentially, endlessly expand their rotten city. 

You will have a unique engine for running your own Swyvers games!

... and a unique and innovative magic system

Magic is not a known factor to the vast majority of the denizen of The Smoke. Rumours of witches abound, but specifics are thin on the ground. 

To cast a spell, put briefly — the caster plays blackjack. 

... and a starting adventure!

A starting adventure is included to get Swyvers moving and involved. Usually they’ll be planning their own heists and crimes, rather than having a justification like this one. Engaged players are happy players and great criminals.

In Blue Cheese, Left to Rot the party rob the Lindsore Estate, uncover their ivy-choked secrets, liberate their ancestral valuables, and maybe solve a few problems and make a few friends or enemies along the way.

Kickstarter campaign ends: Thu, March 7 2024 6:00 PM UTC +00:00

Tonight my party broke into the royal granary, one-shot a cheesethief, sold a ratman-tail to science, and uncovered a major extortion plot - all in one session... Oh, and there was a very noisy goose. Play report coming soon(ish)!