#supermanfictive

I am SO scared for Supergirl next month. I already know it’s going to destroy me emotionally and I’m gonna feel awful when we leave the theatre. Hell I might even start crying DURING the movie who even knows. And Kara is just! Already here a month early. Without the movie even being out. God. How am I supposed to look her in the eye and be like “So I’m not a hero anymore and I hate everyone and I kinda just kill people now. Also I’m in a pseudorelationship with the guy that tried to kill me. And kidnapped Krypto.” I’m??? This is awful. This is why I’m afamilial this family stuff is too difficult

I’m a fictive of Clark Kent and my boyfriend today said “no one in the world hates you as much as Lex" and he said this bc I usually laugh at Lex hating me jokes but idk why this time it wasn’t funny (I’m not mad at my bf I love him very much and he didn’t mean any harm and he won’t make those jokes again) and I had a massive breakdown over it and started sobbing my eyes out and it was really bad and I just. Just bc source wasn’t real doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. Just bc it only happened in my pseudo memories and not in the real world doesn’t mean that my best friend (who I was in love with) slowly disliking me, obsessing over me, and then eventually hating me doesn’t hurt. I love people so much I love everyone so much I see the good in every single thing. I see so much good in him even still and it hurts. I just want my best friend back, and it’s so hard to accept sometimes that it’s not going to happen, even if it could’ve, even if he had the choice to come back to me, he never did. And now he’s not real and he never will and I want to cry