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a little structured poem i made
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I will not ask you to Be Mine
I will not ask you to be mine, for I'm unsure of what you'd say. I will not feed you any lines; I will not beg or plead or pray. I will not ask you to be mine and merely savor every moment. For you are sweet and lovely and kind; I will not ask the cost of love's rent. I will not ask you to be mine, and watch this story write itself. I will let our love go undefined, and take the cards that I am dealt. I will not ask you to be mine, but you should know- I'm yours. And if we should run out of time; let me say I Love You, just once more.
O My body quivers To and fro With ghastly shivers Lo and behold Nightmarish whispers No story told Whorish thoughts disperse Leaving me cold And not a single verse Breaks the mould
An Open Letter to My Body
I would like to apologize to you when I said you were not good enough. All the times I screamed so callously, and did not treat you with love.
I am so sorry for all the poison I have readily poured into you Sometimes getting through the day just meant you took abuse.
And for the times you were not given a single break or proper rest, I know I've pushed you too hard, and really, you did your best.
But the thing I am most sorry for, that I will always regret- is letting others pour their poison in, hurl their callous words at you, with no consent.
It would strike me as amazing that I
Could finally embrace the vacancy
And nearly grasp for it impatiently.
I have gone to the nothing gracefully
Without a desire nor need for goodbye.
They may say they do, but they don’t know why.
Sometimes, people cannot comprehend that
The silence speaks of secrets playfully,
Dangling everything in front of my eye.
I will gaze inside of it shamelessly
Until the darkness becomes my ally
And the everything is mine for taking.
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The world won't hold your hand because you're scared You can't make baby steps into new experiences There are too many anxious kids behind you Just jump right in You can't make baby steps into new experiences You need to take charge of yourself Just jump right in I promise you'll be okay You need to take charge of yourself There are too many anxious kids behind you I promise you'll be okay The world won't hold your hand because you're scared
Me
tidal
You were always an ever-changing ocean Without much thought you made your way Leading me into waters of renewal Oh, how simple I wish things could stay
Without much thought you made your way Drawing me into treacherous pools Oh, how simple I wish things could stay In the end, I am still your fool
Drawing me unknowingly into the fray You knew I would stay forever true I stay waiting for waves to take me away I spend my days only hoping for you
You knew I would stay forever true Some childish hopes never change I spend my days only hoping for you Captivated by the beauty that is your rage
Some childish hopes never change Leading me into waters that promised renewal Captivated by the beauty that is your rage In the end, you were always an ever-changing ocean.
(c) Gillian Fulford, 2013
My courage deserted me as you walked away and I just let you be, silently screaming for you to stay.
Silence borne on the wings of fear; a fear I do not understand. All beauty and sorrow; a tear. A tear for happiness’ end.
