#stedler scribbles

The cliff was actually a really nice location, just outside of the between where sandy beaches started and the protected port laid, all within walking distance of his home and his work at the library. It wasn’t a very popular location. There were multiple stories of how people saw ghosts or seen weird stuff going on up there, and it was generally warned to just not go there.

Virgil liked the stories, he didn’t mind them at all, and he found them quite fun. It was also good on the part that it kept tourists and locals away more often than not.

He just wished Autumn was a little less lonely though. A particularly chilly wind gust cut through his jacket, pricking his skin with goosebumps and numbing his fingers on his ukulele. He sat on the rock watching the sun set, waiting for the stars to shine, and to bring him a friend.

A Scholars Story

Virgil was incredibly excited that morning when he read that his thermometer said it was only plus 9 degrees outside.

Single digits.

Winter was here.

He bundled up in his thick hoodie and pulled a toque over his ears. It was a quick walk to his work at the library with a bound in his step. The day passed relatively quickly and he self checked out a couple new books about astronomy that had come in during the summer. It looked to be a perfect night for stargazing. The sun was slowly setting as he made his way to the cliff. The forecast called for a clear night; he couldn’t wait to look at the stars.

The water shimmered with the last days light, a golden sunset in all the words. The breeze was light but the smell of the sea nipped at his nose all the same with the chill. The large flat rock was still slightly warm from the sun’s kiss, and so he settled there till he saw the first twinkle of star shimmer in the inky black night sky. The gently lapping waves way below a calm pattern and reflecting the moons borrowed light just like the water did the sun.

He looked to his right and found Logan there, telescope supported on its stand like usual, head turned upwards as usual, gazing to the stars above them.

“Hey Lo.”

“Greetings Virgil.” He replied, not looking away from the stars.

“Anything new happening?”

“For me, it has been the same. You know that. But I suppose you are asking that so that I may ask you in return. It has been a while, has it not?”

“Just been a year, like any other. The library did get some new astronomy books on over the summer, and I did check them out, so what do ya say?”

“New books? What kind?”

Virgil smiled at the piqued interest in Logan’s voice. “Two are some advancements in the field and new discoveries, and one about poetry actually, which one?”

“It never fails to amaze me how much your age had furthered the study of the stars, especially when I was only ever able to look through a telescope. But new poetry just for the stars, please read me that one first.”

“I still think you were born in the wrong time Logan,” Virgil said as he pulled out the slim book, plastic gold foil of the cover slightly crinkling at being moved.

“You have said that before, but I have no qualms on such sentiment. If it were not for me and my forefathers your world would not be what it is today.”

“I guess, but I hope you remember what I read about Pioneer 10, it’s part of the title for the first poem.”

“I believe I do, but if I don’t, I know you will remind me.” Logan didn’t look away when Virgil started to read the book aloud.

“Okay,” Virgil cleared his voice. “Pioneer 10, I Here You...”

~*~

Most of Virgil’s evenings were spent that way in the winter. It never truly became to cold, never below freezing, but close enough and especially at night, to want a thicker coat and gloves. Sitting on the largest rock of the circle that was facing, pointing out to the sea to watch the sun set, and if he was lucky, on clear nights Logan would be there, and Virgil would read. The nights of overcast and drizzles were lonely, with Virgil going back to his home after work, knowing Logan wouldn’t be there when the stars couldn’t be seen.

~*~

The moon was half way to waning and the lights of the town were low, and there was not a cloud in the sky. The cold air nipped at his ears and redden his cheeks for him, and he shivered a little bit. It was a perfect night for stargazing, or for reading a book by flashlight.

“Virgil.” Logan interrupted his reading, and Virgil looked up from the textbook he was reading aloud. “You are shivering, and it is getting quite late at night. You should go to your home.” Logan kept his eyes on the sky.

“It’s not that cold out-” Virgil tried to defend himself, just as a large bout of shivers ran through him at the wind gust. “Plus, you’ll still be here. And in just an old coat too.”

“You know that I do not feel the cold, and my attire makes absolutely no difference in whether I will be here or not. Even if you think it is centuries old, it still looks quite nice. I can not say the same for your jacket.”

“Hey! At least I can keep updated with the fashion of the times, and, I don’t want you to feel lonely.” Virgil spied a hint of a smile playing on Logan’s lips.

“I appreciate your concern. But as I have told you before, I do not really get lonely. I was here was before you found me, and I am sure that I will still be here when you can no longer come.”

“What do you mean by that?” Virgil asked, almost sounding offended.

“It is only logical that as time goes on, you develop. Life evolves, and I have to admit, as much as this small town has grown, it is still a small town, and you are bright Virgil. I can not help but see you go far beyond this place. This world could use a mind like yours.” Logan’s voice held a hint of melancholy, eyes never straying from the stars.

“So, you’re saying I’d just jump ship on this town and never come back?”

“Well, not exactly-” Logan attempted to backtrack.

“That’s what it sounds like, but honestly, I enjoy it here. It’s quiet, it’s fun here during the summer and no one else that lives here knows how to manage the library properly or the museum. So, it’s safe to say that I’ll be here for some time. Plus, I’d like to see Halley’s Comet too.”  Virgil smiled, fixing the hood on his jacket.

“I just do not want to see you stuck here like me,” Logan admitted. “As I said, I don’t really get lonely, but I do know that it has been a long time for me. And I am worried I may never be able to leave. I do not want that for you.”

Virgil was quiet for a moment before replying. “Logan, you know I can’t get stuck here like you. I’m alive, your…” Virgil trailed off for a moment, Logan unable to look away from the stars, hummed a low note.

“I promise I won’t get stuck here. If an opportunity pops up, and I’ll let you know if I plan to move, okay?” Logan nodded. “And even if I do move, I’ll make sure to be here with you for the comet.”

“When is the next date again?”

“I think it’s around 2061, every 75- 76 years. So, another 40 years or so till it’ll be here. Not that long in the scheme of time.”

“That would be nice, to not be here, and finally get some rest.” Logan said quietly, almost whispering into the quiet night.

“Yes, it would, wouldn’t it? I can’t imagine how long it has been for you.”

“Nor could have I if I were in your shoes. I do not really get lonely, but being alone for a long time can, mess with someone’s thinking. I do not know how sane I would be anymore if you had not seen me. It is easy to drift and loose yourself if there is nothing to ground you.”

“I’m glad I didn’t freak-out, and that’s what friends are for, keeping each other sane.”

“You consider us friends?” Logan sounded perplexed at the idea.

“Well, yah, why not? We talk, we hang out, social peers as you would probably say.”

“I suppose we do fit the criteria for friends. But answer me this one question please.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“You have more than just me as a friend, correct? Other people you socialise with?”

“Where did that question come from? I called you my friend?”

“Virgil, you are avoiding the question.”

“Well, I guess I do. There’s Remy. They work at the café on Main street.  And I guess there’s Dee, he, well. He’s more of an acquaintance than anything. Why do you wonder?”

“It is the middle of winter, end of the year, and holidays, you do celebrate, do you?” Virgil half shrugged; Logan took that for his answer. “And I just wanted to know that you had family to spend time with. Or at least will not be completely alone for the few days.”

“Oh,” Virgil trailed off, the wind blew and he shivered, clouds could be seen on the far horizon. They gathered low, dark and brooding. “I heard on the forecast that there’s supposed to be a storm rolling in, and it might get cold enough to actually snow. Instead of freezing rain and sleet.” Virgil started on the new topic.

“Really, that would be an interesting phenomenon to see.” Logan replied.

“It would cloud over the sky though. You wouldn’t be out to see it.”

“Maybe it will last long enough for me then, stay frozen on the ground.”

“You still can’t see it that way either though. I’ll take a photo for you, and show you it then.”

“Yes, that would be nice. Photography is such a wonder. Your time has surprised me in more than one way.”

“Ya, I guess it has.” Virgil stayed till the clouds rolled in and Logan was no longer there.

He shivered all the walk home.

~*~

The storm hit hard early morning. Enough that the roads were horrendous to drive and it was way to slippery to walk. For a place that never received snow that often, four inches of white wet frozen snow halted the town, especially with a hidden ice rink under the fluff.

Virgil took many photos for Logan. I looked like a frozen wonderland, with snow and ice stuck to everything. By the time the clouds cleared away for an empty night sky, ten days has passed. The snow had gone to mush, mostly frozen piles of ice and scraped up dirt and leaves from shovels were left.

Logan said the photos were aesthetically pleasing as Virgil held up his phone in front of his gaze.

~*~

It rained over the holidays. Virgil wished he could have visited Logan this year.

~*~

New Years Eve had clear skies. The town was planning fireworks, to be set off from a barge in the pier, and everyone was planning to go to the boardwalks to watch.

Virgil went to the cliff. He packed a blanket to sit on, and a thermos full of coffee.

“Is it New Years already?” Logan asked from his spot as Virgil laid out the blanket. “Time goes so quick, yet so slow.”

“Yes, it is, they’re planning on setting off the fireworks at midnight, so not that long.”

“Fireworks, those are the colourful pyrotechnics, correct?”

“They sure are.” Virgil huffed a laugh at Logan’s wondering. “They’re setting them off from a barge just a little way in the water.”

“Why are you here then?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why are you not with your community? Should it not be more fun to view them with everyone else?” Logan sounded befuddled.

“Because I want to be with you, you are a part of the community, and you shouldn’t be alone.”

“I am not much more than a story Virgil. I do not know how much that makes me a part of the community.”

“Well, I think you are part of my community. If you’re a story as you say, then there’s no one better to be here than a librarian. Plus, the fireworks would be really cool to see from here, if nothing less.” Virgil shrugged. “How are you tonight, any resolutions?”

“I am the same as always Virgil, and I am not really in any position that I would be able to fulfill a resolution. But I know I can ask you the same. How are you, any resolutions?”

Virgil held back a laugh as Logan parroted his phrasing back at him. “I guess I’m okay. Funding for the library is a little tight right now, but the fiscal year end is coming soon, so a new budget should soon be proposed. Work stress is just being put on top of regular stress, and just a little more anxious than average, but its nothing worrisome right now. For resolutions, I guess darker eyeshadow? I’ve, I’ve been looking at stuff like that, trying to gain confidence and better self care. But I’m already doing that, so it’s not really a resolution, but more of a goal I’m working toward.”

“That sounds like a very well planned out goal, and I think you will be quite successful, since you are already perusing and actively working towards your goal.”

“Thanks, teach, that’s nice to hear from someone else.”

“You are welcome, you do not-” A pop and bang interrupted Logan, bright colours from the fireworks lighting up the sky beside the stars as they shot up before fizzing out. Cheers and music could be heard echoing off the water from the docks.

Virgil quickly checked his phone, 12 on the dot. “Happy New Years Logan.”

“Happy New Years Virgil, I have a question.”

“Okay.”

“Is the custom of kissing a loved one still in practice?”

“Yes, it is. Thinking of someone?”

“In a sort. He is now long gone, and I never really understood the wants of passion, but I miss greatly his company.”

“You never really have talked about your life before.”

“I honestly do not recall much. Being as I am, there is not much of me left to remember. I knew I left for research, to study the new land and stars, and that I said I would be back, but time has faded memories a lot. I know I liked his smile, and I thought his eyes were pretty, but I can no longer remember his face. O think sometimes, that if I had not met you Virgil, I would have been long gone a while ago, wandering, and lost. Even recently, I find myself forgetting integral parts of who I was. It is quite disconcerting to say the least.”

“Hey, its okay if your lost, I was lost once too, in a way. Not like you, but still lost, and I had people to help me. I’ll be here to help you; life sucks a lot less now.”  

“That is very kind of you to say, thank you.”

“No problem, I’ll always be here to help.” Virgil replied, sitting beside Logan, watching the stars while everyone celebrated down below.

~*~

The rest of the winter faired a lot nicer, the occasional rain melted away the rest of the snow piles, and Virgil made trips up to the cliff as he could at night when the skies were clear enough for Logan to be there.

Today, grey clouds arrived late afternoon, bringing scattered drizzles and Virgil was disappointed.

He finished reading the last book the other day, and he was excited for the new read, getting into some writing by Steven Hawking, but that won’t happen till the skies cleared. Which made enough time for Virgil to visit one of the two cafés in town.

“Bonjour!”  Remy called from behind the counter. “The usual Virgil?”

“Hello,” Virgil responded with his own greeting. “No, actually. Just a mug of hot chocolate, please.”

“What? No coffee this time? Girl, what’s happenin’ to you?” they laughed.

“Dunno, I feel like I might get to sleep earlier in to night today.” He said as he found change to pay for the drink.

“So, no three am treks to the cliff tonight then? What do you do out there anyways? I know I stay out late sometimes and wander the town, but that cliff is a hecka weird place.” Remy moved behind the counter once he ringed in the price, steaming milk and mixing the ingredients. Virgil just shrugged his shoulders.

“Its more like 12 o’clock walks, and I just read, watch the stars, play music, not much really.”

They shook their head as they handed over the finished drink, whipped cream drizzled with chocolate and confetti sprinkles finished it off. “Even with all the stories of ghosts and kind folk, you still go up there. I swear, one day you’ll go up and never come back down.”

“I haven’t disappeared yet, but if I do, I’ll let you know, kay?” Virgil smirked.

Remy glared. “That doesn’t even make any sense, that sentence!”

“You just don’t see the world like I do. I’d let you know if I’m gone.”  Virgil picked up the mug with a gesture, saying thank you, effectively ending the conversation and finding a comfy seat by the window, watching the rain drip down outside.

~*~  

The weather had warmed up greatly, and plants were starting to green up. The slow transition from winter to spring was starting.

Virgil got a couple more nights with Logan in, and he left him with a smile and a promise for tomorrow night to finish the chapter they were currently in the middle of. On the way home, night lit by stars and the moon, he saw a prairie crocus peeking out of the small green leaves that nestled the purple petals. The first flower of spring. Virgil knew he wouldn’t see the Ghost again till next winter. He wasn’t sad, he’d see Logan again next year, but this also meant that he’d see another friend he had not seen in a year.

A Fae’s Tale

Virgil forced himself to wake up way early, just after sunrise, getting a scant few hours in.

It would be worth it.

He packed his backpack with a blanket and a small stuffed dog, and a lunch bag packed with honey, apples, sliced cheese and crackers, just enough for a small snack for two.

The walk up to the cliff was a little nippy, the wind giving a cool breeze off the ocean. It was pretty out now that the sun had risen and early morning gulls were starting to squawk and call about.

He found Patton like he always did, crouched over a purple crocus that was peeking out from the dried grass. Their attention was solely focused on the first bloom of spring as he walked around the ring of rocks to the largest one at the crest of the cliff, right beside where Logan usually stood. Virgil set down his bag, small smile creeping over his face as he watched Patton and called out to him.

“Hi Patton.” The response was immediate as they looked up. Large smile bright and rosy, and cheeks kissed with freckles by the early morning sun. They bounced up and bounded over to the edge of the ring, almost stepping over but gracefully catching themselves before they did.

“Hi Kiddo! Long time no sea, right?” they giggled out, and from the closer distance he could see each freckle and smell the waft of fresh strawberries and wet grass, earthy and simple and it always made Virgil forget what he was going to say next. Patton was just, different.

“Uhh, ya, since, since the last day of spring, right?” Virgil stammered out, and he saw their bright smile fall. “What? Did I say something wrong?”

“Yes! You didn’t laugh at my pun! Long time no sea, sea, like the water behind you, and I saw you after a long while. You’re no fun if you don’t get my jokes!” they pouted.

“Oh. Oh!” Virgil gasped in realization. “I get it now. That was a really clever one. It went right over my head. Do you accept my apology?” He asked. He watched Patton tilt their head thoughtfully, fluff of golden hair falling over their honey brown and emerald green eyes. A moment passed before the sun returned their smile. “Of course! Apology accepted. I wouldn’t want anything happening to my favourite human, would I?” they teased, bouncing up and down in place on their toes. Virgil hoped they were teasing at the last statement, sometimes it was difficult to tell what was supposed to be a joke and what was actual talk. He smiled and nodded anyways.

“Since it really has been quite some time, and its your first day of spring, I thought I would visit you for a little bit, till I have to go to work at 9. I’ll have to leave in a little bit, but would you care for some breakfast with me? But if you want to, that is, as friends?” he asked carefully, experience making it easy to step around and follow the rules.

Patton’s smile relaxed. “Oh, I would be delighted.”

Virgil pulled out the lunch bas and they both sat down at the rock like at a dining table. The tense air dispersed as formalities were met. Virgil pulled out the food, mixing and matching the toppings on the crackers.

Patton giggled as they picked up a cracker with all three toppings placed on top, it sounded like bells chiming in the wind. “Your foods are always so interesting and funny. But they’re still good.” They ate the cracker in one bite.

“What’s so funny about my food? I thought you liked cheese.” Virgil asked as he chose his own cracker snack.

“Oh, I do love cheese, don’t worry about that,” they picked up a few slices and ate them to prove that point, smile a bit sharper than should normally be. “But its funny how you get it. Apples aren’t in season yet, and the honey isn’t from the local flowers. Its just. Funny.” They shrugged a shoulder and picked up another cracker.

“I guess it is funny in a way, but that’s how everyone had food these days. I go to work at the library and earn money, and I use that money to pay for things I need, like food. And those who make food makes a lot of it so we all have some all year long, till it grows again.” Virgil answers.

“I know that, silly. We have markets too, but the food is always in season, and stuff never goes to waste, and we don’t put it in silly boxes like you guys do either. Its funny, those who make your food are very silly.”

Virgil nodded. “Ya, they are really silly,” he picked up a cracker, and then put it back down, somewhat fiddling with how the apple slice and cheese were layered on top of each other.

“Did I say something wrong now?” he could here Patton’s smile fall again. Virgil glanced up and their eyes were looking right at him, he couldn’t not tell the truth.

“No, you didn’t, it just reminds me that there’s not much I can do to stop other people from being, silly, with stuff as important as food, and it’s a lot to talk about on such little sleep.”

“Oh, I apologise-” Patton spoke.

“Already forgiven.” Virgil replied before they had even finished.

“And why then, do you have such little sleep?” Patton’s sweet-sounding voice asked.

“I- I stayed up really late last night, but I also woke early to see you, so, so I didn’t get much sleep.” His words felt like they were sliding out of his mouth.

“Aww, that is so kind of you, kiddo, but I’d really rather you have a good night’s sleep and feel good the rest of the day than not feel good at all. You humans need sleep to keep healthy, right?” their voice was like sweet cinnamon rolls and honey dripping. He nodded his head earnestly. Patton’s smile returned sharply. “Okay then, can you promise me that you’ll do better to get a good night’s sleep?”

“I- I don’t-” Virgil tried to blink the fogginess out of his eyes, the world cleared up around him a little bit.

“Oh, please Vee, for Me?” their smile was a little to sharp looking.

“I’m sorry, I can’t make any promises, you know what Patton.” Virgil leaned back, rubbing the magic out of his eyes.

Patton seemed to deflate a little, shoulders sagging. “But I want you to be happy. You are so tired that my pun flew over your head. That’s not happy. You don’t feel happy at all right now.” Their voice had lost its syrupy sweetness.

“No, its not, but it's also promising to do something that I know I can’t keep. I don’t get sleep easily sometimes, even if I want it.” Virgil sighed, his own shoulders sinking.

“That’s no fun at all.” Patton pouted.

“No, its not.” Virgil agreed. “I can’t promise you anything, but I can say that I’ll try to do better though, get back on an early bedtime schedule, okay?”

Their smile returned and Patton nodded. “Those words are good for now.”

“What was that voice thing you did Patton?” Virgil asked.

“Voice thing?”

“Ya, when your voice-” A sharp buzzing ring interrupted Virgil and they both jumped at the alarm. Virgil fumbled to pull his phone out of his pocket, silencing the alarm. “I have to go now; I start work in half an hour.” He moved to pack away the unused snacks. He left the finished crackers where they were though. Virgil was just about to stand up, slinging his backpack over his shoulder when Patton called out.

“Wait! I think I have something better than just words.” They took a moment, looking around at the purple crocuses near the rock, and plucked one, the delicate stem held between their fingers and then tucked behind his ear when Patton beckoned Virgil to lean forward. His purple dyed hair complementing the flower, and Patton pecked a quick kiss on his forehead. “There, now you’ll have a good day, and a good night’s rest, okay?” Patton beamed.

“I can’t make any promises, but I can try my best.” Virgil answered, smile playing across his own lips.

“That’s all I ask for!” Virgil stood up. He knows he has to leave now or else the would both get stuck talking and laughing with each other.

The rest of the day went pleasantly well, despite his lack of sleep. And the flower did not wilt one bit. Virgil fell asleep easily and early that night.

~*~  

Waking up the next morning was easy, even if the sun was rising earlier each day.

He only had the stuffed puppy he forgot to give on hand today as he made his walk up. The ring of rocks was empty when Virgil made it to the top of the cliff. All the crackers he left were gone. He placed the stuffed dog on the rock. He sat and watched gulls fly around and squawk at the waves and at the docks below the cliff for a while.

His phones alarm buzzed and he left for the library.

~*~

The purple flower still hadn’t wilted, and Virgil still had an almost to easy time falling asleep. The consistent sleep schedule really helped easy the dark shadows under his eyes, even though they didn’t fully go away. The stuffed animal was gone the next morning when Virgil arrived, even though there were no traces of Patton having been there.

The next couple days were the same. Virgil walked up to the cliff with no Patton there.

~*~

The flower was completely dried the next morning, wilted and brown. That piqued Virgil’s attention, and he was glad it was his day off. Virgil packed his backpack with the usual snacks and a blanket, and made his way to the cliff. The sun was bright early morning, a couple puffy white clouds whisked across the sky with the breeze carrying the salty smell of the ocean and the sweet perfume of the blooms that had sprouted up all over the field the cliff supported.

Patton was in their circle looking at the flowers that had sprouted up all around, wild daisies, lilies and other flowers he couldn’t identify were in all different stages of popping up from the ground, sprigs of green between dried brown.

“Hello Patton!” He called out causing them to look up. A bright smile stretched across their face.

“Hi Vee! Its lily to see you again!” they called out, skipping up to the large rock. Virgil noticed the crown of flowers weaved through their curly hair, it looked really cute on them.

“It’s lovely to see you again also Patton.” Virgil replied, catching the word play. Patton bounced and clapped their hands.

“Yay! You got it! It’s always a lot more fun when you get my puns.” Virgil sat down, prompting Patton to do the same, they immediately leaned forward, propping their head in their hands. “How are you?” they asked.

“Pretty okay, my sleep has been mostly consistent, the flower has wilted though, but it was nice while it lasted. Work has been annoying though. My co-worker Dee has not been helpful at all this past week, we are doing inventory and checking the condition of the stacks, and he’s not really doing a good job of it. And I don’t know if its because he doesn’t know how to do it properly or if he just does not like this work or if he’s mad at me for some reason, and it’s just, frustrating. Some of the assistants are complaining too and so… it’s just a small mess.” Virgil vented, running out of steam at the end. Patton didn’t blink the entire time, focused on Virgil.

“I thought something was feeling sad, want me to help?”

“No thank you Patton, there isn’t much anyone can do about this.”

“Don’t say that Kiddo! There is a lot you can do, even without my help! I can feel that this is making you frustrated, and it’s making you not happy in a place that usually has you feeling content. Let me help?” Patton’s voice took a honey hint at that last sentence.

“Well, I, Uh-” Virgil stuttered.

“Please, I can help make it better, but only if you let me, and let me help you.” Patton’s smile was gentle and their words sounded like caramel.

“I, I- No, I can’t let you Patton.” Virgil shook his head, clearing away the fuzziness. “And you got to stop that speech thing your doing.”

“Speech thing?” Patton sounded confused, and the sweetness to their words were gone.

“Yes, where whatever you say sounds so good, like candy, or something soft and it makes my head feel so weird, I don’t like it at all. And for the work thing, it stays that, a work thing. If it goes on any longer, I’ll talk to him and if that doesn’t resolve anything then I’ll be asking the director and we’ll sort it out from there. Okay?” Virgil explained.

“Ohh, okay.” Patton agreed. “I’ll leave your work thing alone.” That was the closest Virgil was ever going to get for a promise from Patton. “The word thing, its something I learned recently actually. It would translate to your language as ‘silver tongue’, it’s just a, really persuasive way of talking to others, I guess.” Patton tried to explain.

“Oh, that does make sense in a way, but it makes me feel really uncomfortable when you use it.”

“So, you don’t want me using it on you then?” They asked

“Yes,” Virgil nodded. “that is a firm boundary there. I’m just curious though, what can silver tongue all persuade a person to do?”

“Oh, lots of things Kiddo. Lots of other folk use it to ask for people's names, or to convince them to dance with them and other little things like that.” Patton shrugged a shoulder, leaning back from the rock.

“Oh, but you already know my name, so why use it?” Virgil sounded confused.

“I know that I have your name, but you can use it for more than just asking for a name, like asking permissions to help with something, especially if the person is stubborn and won’t accept help. Or you could be able to help calm someone down, by convincing them to not be angry, or to not be worried or scared. Lots of things. And I thought that if you were feeling really, really sad, that I could help you feel nicer for a bit. But you don’t like the feel of it so I won’t do it on you. I’d like you to be happy, but when you feel like it.” they extrapolated.

“Okay, that does sound really useful.”

“And that’s why I wanted to help! You could get Dee to not be a problem, and then you wouldn’t be sad.”

“You said you would not interfere, and I still do not want you to be involved either, lets just drop this topic, okay?”

“Okay, I won't bug you about it anymore.” Patton agreed.

“Thankyou,” Virgil pulled out his phone, it was only a few hours left till noon. “Do you just want to lay back and watch the clouds? I brought a blanket and I could use the relaxation.”

“Sure, you always make up such interesting shapes.” Virgil pulled out the blanket from his backpack and unfolded it with a toss, the fabric parachuting into a ruffled pile. Patton giggled and dragged the corner that landed on his side out, fitting the blanket half and half between the rocks.  

They laid out side by side, and Virgil sighed as just the waves splashing below filled the air with sound besides the gull’s cries. It was peaceful. And if he dozed off for a bit under the sun, and woke up just after noon with no Patton in sight, and another crocus tucked behind his ear, that was okay.

~*~

One morning it was raining and Virgil held an umbrella all the way up the cliff. Patton was dancing, practically frolicking around in the falling water and grass that swayed in the wind. It was a beautiful sight, and even though he had to refuse their offer to dance Virgil still got wet spinning and jumping around in the wet. The spring flowers seemed to dance alongside them.

~*~

Virgil didn’t realize but Patton’s humming was like silver, in a good way though. It was glistening and smooth, and very, very pretty. He barely twitched as a new section of his hair was taken up and moved, locks of purple dyed strands being braided and weaved with the stems of the assorted wild flowers around them. Patton naming each and every one of them and speak singing the good properties and meanings each bloom meant, soft and gentle in between the lilting and wandering notes.

Sometimes, when Virgil payed enough attention, Patton’s humming sounded familiar, the wandering tunes echoing melodies of old songs sang by generations ago. Lullaby’s and folk tunes that were almost forgotten, but were remembered enough for festivals. Most times though, the music would sit in his ear, snippets of phrases and measures collected there till he wrote them down and plunked them out on his ukulele. Sometimes the music was nice, sometimes, it was better left played once.

Patton giggled, and Virgil cracked open one eye, seeing the bright eyes sparkle and freckles that splatter across their cheeks over top of him as he was reclined over the rock. He raised his brow, a silent ponder asked.

They shook their head, smile bright with another giggle. “Oh, its nothin’ kiddo! You just look so cute! Just good enough to gobble up!” they giggled again, and they caught the concerned look on Virgil. “Oh, don’t worry, I won’t eat you, you’re safe from being eaten, I’d rather my favorite human be beside me, than inside of me.”

It took a moment for Virgil to find his voice. “Well… that’s comforting.”

“It is! Oh, I’m glad! Your flower crown is almost done, just lean back again and then you’ll match me!”

Virgil leaned back and closed his eyes against the bright mid morning sun. It was another few moments until the hands let up.

“Okay, you’re done, and you look so cute! Do you like it?” they asked.

Virgil sat up carefully, not wanting to mess up their hard work. He pulled out his phone and swiped to the camera. The white, light pink and purple toned flowers blended well with his dark brown and dyed purple colours, it really was beautiful. “This, this is really great. I love the colours; they go well with yours.” Patton’s flowers were mostly bright pink and yellow with the occasional blue bloom peaking through. It was quite an ethereal sight really, with the way the suns light lit up their cheeks and made their curly hair shimmer.

“Now since you have a crown, you can be a princess beside me, or a lord, what would your place be? For your gender, what are the words again?”

Virgil laughed lightly, finding the question humorous. “I don’t think I’d have a place of any significance, let alone be a prince, Patton.”

“Oh, don’t be silly! You’d be super important! You have all these stories and you always bring really neat stuff. You’d be a story keeper, and the lil’ ones would come up to you asking about the human world and you would explain it so well. Your important kiddo! Super important!”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I’m not so sure…” Virgil ducked his head, trying to hide away the blush that was creeping across his cheeks.

“Well, I am very sure that you are important, since you are important to me. The court would love you; you could play your music for us and I’d get to dance with you. And we could play the day away and you’d never have to worry about not getting enough sleep. Oh! And you’d get to try my food, once you taste it, I’m sure you’d never want to leave. What do you say?” Patton gushed, and Virgil was speechless for a moment.

“Wow, uh, that- that’s really flattering, and it sounds wonderful. But, Patton, you know I can’t go over with you. As much as I would like to, I have made my own commitments and promises that I can’t break. When would I come back if I left with you?” Virgil asked.

“Well, I guess if you wanted to, spring and autumn would work.” Patton answered.

“Why then?

“Because I’m spring, I’m able to be here because of spring, and autumn because that’s your season, it just fits. And that’s when we’d be able to come here, in the morning, and then the evening.”

“No summer and daytime, no winter and night?” Virgil implored.

Patton shook their head no.

Virgil sighed. “Maybe in a different time of my life, but I can’t say anything right now. I’m sorry.” He said softly, seeing how Patton’s smile morphed into a sad look.

“I know,” they replied. “It’s just that I don’t want to lose you. You humans are so fragile and delicate and I can’t stand the idea of me not being able to help you. Sometimes, when you come, you feel so sad. And its really heavy like a storm cloud overtop or like a deep weight on your chest, and no matter how many puns I make your smiles don’t reach your eyes and your laughs are hollow. And then that makes me sad, and it stays that way for weeks until you feel better. Sometimes you are angry, or frustrated. Sometimes that’s at other people, but its also directed towards yourself, and you just make yourself feel worse. I don’t want that for you. Please don’t cry, if you cry, then I’ll cry, and that won’t make you happy.” Patton pouted, moving to reach over the rock between them, but Virgil was sat back just far enough away out of Patton’s reach.

Virgil shook his head; his sweaters sleeves bunched over his hands and was wiping away the tears that tracked down his cheeks. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

“No, don’t be sorry, I made you cry, I never want you to cry.” Patton implored.

“It’s not your fault, I’m the one here that’s emotionally constipated and has a messed-up brain chemistry. General social anxiety can really mess over a person. It’s not your fault.”

“But I said stuff that made you cry!”

“But its things that are true. I am sad a lot of the time. I get so anxious at the thought of interacting with people, and then when I do interact with people, I’m not familiar with, I always mess up. But I know I could be doing better and I know I can do better, but it doesn’t always go well. So yes, I am frustrated at myself, and there are people at work that are not always the best to work with, and its very draining and my spoons for social interaction gets eaten up so quick its ridiculous. You just, reminded me of the truth that I try to forget sometimes, and I forget it easily when I’m up here. It was just… a small shock, I guess you could say.” Virgil fiddled with his hoodie’s sleeves, finding dry spots and rubbing away the salty tears as they escaped from his eyes. Patton had their own tears falling from their eyes. They held their arms out motioning for Virgil to get closer, as they moved to sit on their edge of the rock. Virgil sat down mirroring Patton.

“Oh kiddo, why didn’t you let me know before? I can help with that type of stuff, all you needed was to ask.”

“The thing is though Patton, I can’t ask for your help. I hate to say it but that the truth. I can’t rely on someone to fix all of my problems for me. I need to work on it myself if I want to truly get better, and be able to keep being better.”

“You have those other people helping your brain make the proper things, what is so different to me than that?”

“Other people?” Virgil was confused at the wording.

“Ya, you said one time that they had to check up on you, or that you were going to check up with them.” Patton tired to explain better.

“Oh, doctors, you mean doctors. They tell me how I am able to help myself, and help me get to a functional level, which is what my medication does. And if I stop the medication I fall back, they don’t do it for me, they just help me get there. I have to work at getting better, it doesn’t just happen for me.” Virgil explained, and Patton’s face just looked crumpled, they sniffed.

“That’s no fair, you humans are so silly sometimes. When someone in court gets sick, we have all the different types of magic that helps them get better really soon. You should be able to get better really soon also, and not have to work really hard to do it.”

“I hate to say it, but that’s the way it is right now. We have to work hard to get a lot of things better right now.”

“I hear you; I just want to help you though.”

“You do help me though.”

“I do?” Patton sounded hopeful at that statement.

“Of course. You make me laugh with your puns, and smile when there’s a good joke or you being happy. I forget about worry and stress and stupid work things when I’m up here, and I visit you. I enjoy your company, and seeing you does make my day go nicer. You’re my friend, and just that alone helps me.” Patton smiled, and it was like a weight over them was lifted off their chests. Patton leaned towards Virgil and Virgil leaned towards them, meeting in the middle of the rock, shoulder to shoulder.

“I am very happy to hear that I am able to help now, and just to let you know, any flowers picked from this cliff will stay pretty for you, okay?”

“Oh, uh, okay.” Virgil nodded, drying the last of the tear tracks on his cheeks.

~*~

The first true thunderstorm of the season happened at night, glass windows reverberating and rattling with the force of the soundwaves. Virgil sat by his bedroom window and watched the downpour hit the earth. The spring blooms and the sweet-smelling buds off his apple tree disappeared under the rains force. Lightning flashes illuminated the world for split seconds, and he wondered how Patton would dance to such percussive beats if he was here during the night. He wondered if Patton would be there in the morning with all the flowers almost gone.

~*~

“Is there any more cheese Vee?” Patton asked through a mouthful of aforementioned cheese and crackers.

“I’m pretty sure you ate the majority of it today.” Virgil replied, lifting his backpack to look inside. He shook his head. “Nope, there is none left.”

“Aww, you should bring even more next time.”

“Pat, that was a 500-gram block of cheese, you do understand that cheese costs money, right?”

“Sure, I do kiddo! You have money, you said that’s how you guys work your markets, right?”

“Yes, but it’s not that simple. Cheese is expensive, I have to pay a lot of money to not get much actual cheese in exchange. It takes a lot of time and work to make good cheese and for me to get it, I need to pay for that.”

“Oh, that seems weird, anybody should be able to get nice stuff, and not for those who have a lot and can buy it. anybody should be able to pay for it.”

“I know, that is… something we humans really need to work on.”

“Then why don’t you humans work on it?”

“Because those who have the money for the nice stuff are also usually the ones who are influential to the rule makers and are also able to make rules, so its not easy to work on it when some people don’t want it to change.”

“Oh…”

“Yah,”

“Then why don’t you do it?” Patton asked, scooping honey onto an apple slice.

“Me? Why do you say that!?” Virgil replied shocked at Patton’s statement.

“Why wouldn’t you be? You’re special, you’d get lots of people listening to you and then you’d fix stuff, and then you’d be able to buy more cheese.”

“Patton, it, doesn’t work like that. It would take so much work, so many people to go through, and lots of them have money, and I really don’t. I’m just a librarian from a small port town, practically a tourist trap, no one would listen to me.”

“If you keep saying bad things about yourself, I’m gonna fight you! You’re a story keeper kiddo, that so important! But more importantly, you are a storyteller, and you know what, those who tell stories gets to make them. Those who make the stories, and tell the stories get to change the story how ever they want too, so that it ends how they want it. Tell your story how you want it to be Vee!” Patton replied brightly, big smile on their face as they munched down on the apple slice.

Virgil shook his head, a look of disbelief on his face. “It just does not work like that Patton.”

“Why can’t it?”

“Because!”

“Because why?”

“I don’t know? Societies stupid!”

“Then change your society.”

“Its not that simple!”

“Why can’t it be?”

“I don’t know! It just is!”

“I don’t know why you keep doubting me kiddo, you’re special, you can do this stuff.” Patton looked and sounded irritated. Virgil let out a low breath, trying to calm down from the heated exchange.

“Why do you keep calling me special? I’m just a librarian.” Virgil spoke up after a long moment of silence, voice low and doubtful.

“I don’t know why you keep saying that you aren’t.”

“It’s because I’m not special! That’s why!”

“That’s not what I see.” They implored.

“What do you see then?” Virgil huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back.

“When I look, I see one who can see more than what a usual person does. Understands that life is beyond what people think, and for all the worries that grip your heart and play with your mind, you do not let them corral you. You still walk the land and give balance to your season.”  Patton said seriously, not looking away from Virgil. Eyes seeming to look deeper than just his appearance.

Virgil broke the eye contact, ducking his head. “Wow, that was not what I was expecting.”

“What were you expecting then?”

“I don’t know, something like how I’m ambitious, or charismatic or a ‘natural-born-leader’ or something similarly stupid like that, the things teachers give out on report cards.”

“Those things don’t really matter actually, it’s the life inside you that counts, and your life is so special and wonderful, and I want you to be happy.”

Virgil shook his head. “I don’t know if I believe that right now Patton.”

“Believe what part of it?” they asked.

“The part where I’m special. Ya I see the ghost the here during the winter and I semi regularly affiliate with the kind folk, and I have not yet been eaten, so I’m lucky in that sense. I don’t think that’s special, it’s just normal for me.” Virgil shrugged his shoulders, not really sure what else to say.

Patton smiled, soft and light. “That’s okay, I guess thinking yourself normal is easier than being special. I’m glad you believe that I want you happy, because your working hard for your happiness and you deserve it.”

Virgil nodded; a small smile appeared.

Patton hummed, and changed the topic. “Do you want to dance?” they asked.

Virgil looked up, “You know I can’t dance.”

“I know you can dance, but you can’t dance with me. But that’s not what I’m asking.”

“Then what are you asking?”

“I’m asking if you want to dance. Do you want to dance?” Patton asked, “Not with me, but beside me instead. I know you can’t come inside the ring, but you don’t have to, to dance with me.”

“Are you sure?” Virgil asked.

“Of course, we can go toe to toe, my side and your side, and dance. Just one dance, please?” they asked.

“As long as I don’t step inside, okay?”

“Okay.” Patton agreed.

They both stood up and stepped close, each on their own sides of the ring and joined hands. It was a little bit awkward with no proper music, but Patton giggled and Virgil had a blush creeping across his cheeks. They started humming, sweet and lilting, melody floating through the air and they stepped side to side, swaying back and forth in spot. Just like high schoolers on their first dance. It was a sweet moment, until Virgil’s alarm rang, cutting through Patton’s humming startling them both out of the dance.

“You have to leave?” they asked.

“Yes, I need to get going, if I stay any longer, I’ll be late, and I don’t really want that.” I’ll see you later, okay?” Virgil bent down, and picked up his backpack and the garbage from the snacks leaving the assembled crackers on the rock.

Gulls cawed as he made his way, waving to Patton, who was left standing at the border from there broken dance.

~*~

Virgil laid a paper on the table beside Dee in the breakroom. I was not a surprise that he was in the breakroom. He glanced up from his phone.

“Can I help you?” Dee did not sound interested in his offer one bit.

“No, not really anymore. I’m just here to let you know that three employees have filled out grievance reports against you, and I just finished filling out one. The director will be following up on the reports, and so if you want to keep this job, you better get your act in gear.”

“What? Are you serious?” that got his attention, he was still trying to look casual but failing with the concern showing in his eyes.

“Of course, I am serious. Why would I lie about something like this? Its not like my dog died, even though I don’t have a dog.”

Dee just glared as he picked up the paper, scanning the sheet with seeming disinterest. “I hardly see a reason to make such a big fuss about this. A couple days late, and I called in for a few yes, but aren’t we allowed a couple days here and there, anyways?”

“We’re allotted those days for when we are sick, or have family emergencies, or other similar events. Not because you feel like you don’t want to work that day.” Virgil took back the page. “I really hope the director is throughout in her follow up. And your break has been done for the past 25 minutes, and I know the books wont re-shelf themselves.” Virgil turned and left the break room, hiding his shaking hands and trembling shoulders. He could have a mini breakdown in his office before having to go back onto the floor. He breathed and counted to 4,7,8, trying to recall the melody Patton hummed earlier during their dance.

~*~

Patton didn’t show up the next week, and the blazing sun decided it was time to start raising temperatures. All the trees blooms were gone, and summer was here.

A Player’s Play

Summer came in strong over the course of a couple days. The rain had made the grass green and leaves were starting to bush out on shrubs and trees. The nights never got to cold anymore and the days were growing much longer, and the sandy beach just outside of town proper began to be populated during the weekends and warm afternoons. But what signaled to Virgil that summer was here was the construction of the outdoor stage in the square, just across from the library. The festivals and summer tourist attractions the town put on always included theater, which also meant that the theater company would be arriving soon. And with that, the arrival of someone not seen in a year’s time.

It was noon, bright and warm with a slight breeze ruffling the trees leaves. Virgil was spending his lunch break watching the stage curtains be hung and attached when a van pulled up and parked.  He couldn’t help the excitement and small smile when he recognised a few of the faces that stepped out of the vehicle. And he couldn’t help the large smile when he saw Roman step out of the van, bright and laughing.  

He looked around for a moment, pulling sunglasses on under the suns warm light, he paused when his gaze met Virgil’s, and it seemed like forever they looked at each other after such a long time apart. As if the actor could no longer spend a second apart, he ran across the square.

“Virgil,” He called out once he got closer, stopping short of landing on the librarian. Virgil stood and let Roman engulf him in a brief but welcomed hug. “Virgil, hi! Its been forever, hasn’t it?”

‘Hi Roman, its been a year, like it always had been.” He shrugged.

“Yes, a year, but years can be measured in many ways, and I feel like I have missed to many moments with you already, to many cups of coffee not shared, and I do not want to waste any now that we are here together.” Roman replied.

“Wait, is that a /Rent/ reference?” Virgil laughed, “You nerd.”

“I have to admit it is, but its theater geek to you, you emo.”

“I’m not that emo, just enough so I don’t offend the old people and I don’t scare away the kids.”

“I guess you go the position, then?”

“Yah, I did, just two weeks after you left last summer actually. Its- its been different, but nice. A little more pay, a little more freedom with my schedule. Its still work though, and there’s still a lot to stress about sometimes, but I’m getting better at managing and all that stuff. How about you?”

“Oh, not much really, I’m still here again. A few auditions that went okay, a few that didn’t, a callback that didn’t line up. You know, the usual stuff. It sounds like you have it pretty stable here though.”

“Ya, I guess, I-”

“Hey Roman!” One of the cast members called across the square, they both turned to look. “Come get you luggage, lover boy! We’re checking in soon!”

“Lover boy?” Virgil questioned, crossing his arms.

Roman laughed, that’s just Val, don’t worry about her, she’s practically a sister to me. And like any good sibling, teasing is abound to happen.”

“Okay, but don’t let me hold you up, I don’t want you getting into any more trouble that you already do.”

“Excuse me, I do not get into trouble, as a noble prince I am always on my best.”

“So, you’re a prince then?”

“Yes, and also a knight, and a townsperson. A couple different things this year. I think you’ll like the plays we put on this season.”

“I can’t wait to see them, but you better go.”

“Yes, I should, where will I be able to find you?”

“Where I’m always found. My lunch break is done soon also, would tomorrow work for you? In the evening, late afternoon?”

“I’ll make it work.” Roman answered and tuned, Virgil watched him walk across the square back to the van. Virgil went back inside.

~*~

It was late afternoon as Virgil walked up to the cliff. The sun was bright and the breeze as he crested the walking path was warm. The long grasses had finally greened after the spring rain and now late season wild flowers were starting to show their colours.

A flight of gulls took off from the beach below and he watched the swirling white spirals the birds flew as they settled, startled, and resettled on the sand below. Once again waiting till another little kid runs up and screams them into flight again.

Virgil settled on the rock, and watched the clouds drift by.

The sun was getting low when he heard the brushing step of someone walking through the grass, he turned and saw Roman. He was reminded of just how much a year can change a person.

Roman already seemed to have tanned a bit, lightly sun-kissed and he seemed more confident in the way he carried himself, shoulders strong but relaxed, a quiet confidence. And in looking at his shoulders, he seemed more well defined, muscles toned and strength added to them. Yet he was gentle with his every move, soft and doing his best to not crush and sprouting flowers. And the way his smile lit up his face and the way his eyes sparkled in the low sunlight, never changed.

Roman had always amazed him.

He sat down beside Virgil on the rock, and a settled quiet sat with them. They watched the sunset, purples and reds colouring the sky around them.

~*~

The stage was completely built, curtains and the lighting rigs were hung, and the backstage wings cordoned off from the sitting view of the audience. Virgil had a side view of the square from his office, his window showing a world that was a balance on two sides. One where the suspension of disbelief was held and the actors became the characters they portrayed, and the other side where masks fell off and everyone showed their true nature, it was a duality that enthralled him. it was a duality he wished he could play too also, but being able to see Roman rehearse was almost just as good.

He looked dashing in his prince costume, white fabric and red sash, gold details shining in the sunlight. He couldn’t hear what was being said, but he could see with the gestures and reactions from the princess on the stage and the rest of the crew, the words and scenes must be hilarious. Roman and the other actors did well to keep their faces on. Virgil glanced at the clock; he just had a half hour left.

He finished his tasks and clocked out, waving goodbye to the front desk people before exiting the cool air of the library to the warm air of outside. The afternoons breeze carrying the salty sent of the ocean and the leaves of the trees rustled. He made his way to the mainstage to the gate and followed it along till he got to the edge of the stage. Everyone now was in a circle, talking and people had scripts out taking notes and nodding along to who seemed to be the director.

He caught Romans eye was he glanced up, and the serious look he had melted for a moment, brief smile gracing his face before he focused back to the group. It was another few moments until they were dismissed and a couple more after that till Roman appeared from behind stage, back in his street clothes and sunglasses.

“Hey.” Virgil called.

“Wheat.” Roman called back with a laugh. Virgil shook his head and bumped his shoulders with Roman as they walked down the sidewalk even though the actor was a couple inches taller than him.

“Stop it, you know what I meant.”

“I know, I just like seeing you smile, bright as the sun, and your eyes twinkle like stars, and the small laugh that escapes sounds like wind chimes and beauty, just like you.” Roman complemented, nudging Virgil back.

“Oh, stop that, I’m nothing like that.” Virgil shook his head.

“On the contrary, I could describe a thousand things and they would not be as beautiful as you.” Roman cajoled, but he saw the sower turn of Virgil’s lips, a pinched expression showing. “Hey,” he said softer. “You know I just want you to be happy, right?” He saw Virgil nod. “Then can I ask you a question?”

“What question?”

“Do you trust me?”

“Trust in what?”

“I don’t know, do you trust me?”

“I guess I do, why?”

“Because trust me when I say that I really do want you to be happy and I hope that I am able, one day, to be beside you, helping you to be happy, and that if you want to, you’ll be by my side, just as I want to be by yours.” Roman brushed his hand against Virgil’s as they walked, and they let their fingers tangle together.

“That sounds like a lovely idea, I just don’t know if we’ll ever get there though.”

“I think we will, even if we ever only meet in the summer, we’ll still have each other if we don’t get anywhere else. Sometimes, I think about us, and if this is as far as we get, I think I’ll be content with that.”

“Really? No more grand gestures of romantic declaration?”

“Well, I wish for that, but if this is it, then that’ll be okay, because we made what we have work, and I won't trade that for anything else if that means not knowing you, cause you’re amazing, just the way you are.” Roman sang the last part of the sentence, cracking a smile out of Virgil.

“What, are you going to serenade me now? I thought the flattery was enough.”

“My dear, nothing is enough for you, why don’t you sing with me?”

“I- I, no, not here at least.”

“Do you still play the ukulele?” Roman asked.

Virgil nodded, “Ya, I still pick it up occasionally.”

“Then if you’re not comfortable singing, then we could duet, featuring you on your ukulele, and I can sing. I know there are a few good covers that transpose too the fingerings you need on the internet, if you’re up for that?”

Virgil shrugged, bumping shoulders once again with Roman. “Maybe. Hey, do you want some ice cream?” He asked, gesturing to the shop across the street.

Roman smiled and tugged their joined hands, Virgil was gladly pulled along.

~*~

It was a week later that Virgil found himself at the cliff again, plucking at the uke, staring at messy scribbles of cords and key progressions scribbled on loose leaf, a melody half developed as Virgil looked at it. the waves crashing below were a good white noise to fill the silence between the sounds. He put down the small instrument when he heard the steps of an approaching person.

He turned and saw Roman, picnic basket in hand, walking around the outside of the rock circle to him.

“I thought a mid-day lunch would be nice.” the actor called out, and Virgil beckoned him closer.

“Where did you get the basket from? And where’d you get all the stuff from?”

“I have my ways Virgil, and this small town has a decent grocery store despite its size,” Roman sat down beside Virgil. “I don’t get why people don’t like this cliff; it has an absolutely beautiful view.”

“There’s stories about this place, and small towns seem to not want to chance pissing off a ghost of disrespect the good folk.” Virgil answered.

“That is absolutely ridiculous,” Roman shook his head. “If you don’t want to piss anybody off, then just ask nicely, be respectful, and pick up your garbage after you. It’s not that hard.”

Virgil smiled at Romans answer. “I know, that’s that I do at least, but when people ask and I answer, they don’t seem to listen, even though I’m giving the answer.”

“I know, such a folly that people won’t believe what is outside of their comfort, but hey, at least we get to be here in peace.”

“I guess, what’s in the basket?”

“I’d thought you’d never ask,” Roman flipped the top up. “I got something simple, sandwiches, and a cooler bag full of popsicles. So, we better eat before the melt on us.”

“We could have just bought some on the way back, instead of having them melt.”

“I know, but I think we needed something cool for such a hot view.” Roman waggled his brows, getting a snicker out of Virgil who snatched a wrapped sandwich out of the actor’s hands.

“You are ridiculous.”

“And you love it. But I know, it’s an understood thing.”

~*~

“Mon amour, you are so beautiful today.” Roman said out of the blue.

“Hah! If you are going to speak French, go talk to Remy.” Virgil replied.

“Remy?”

“Ya, they work at the coffee shop on Main.”

“Gasp! Are you cheating on me?” Roman threw a theatrical hand against his chest.

“If cheating consists of me buying coffee, then yes. But I thought you had said it wouldn’t work between us.”

“I never said it wouldn’t, but that we should be open to possibilities around us.”

“Ah, I haven’t.”

“Haven’t what?”

“There’s been no other possibilities, there’s not really anybody else here.”

“Oh, … well, the same for me actually.”  Roman admitted.

“We are stuck, aren’t we?” Virgil asked.

Roman hummed and wrapped an arm around Virgil’s back. “I guess we are quite a pair, one day will be the right time, and we’ll figure ourselves out.”

“One day?” Virgil’s tone held disbelief, but also a little bit of hope.

“I promise, we’ll figure ourselves out.”

“I hope so, it gets lonely when you leave.”

“You do have other friends, right?” Roman asked. Virgil shrugged his shoulders.

“Some, I got Remy, others come and go too.”

“Oh,” It was quiet for a moment. “You’re still able to come to the play on Friday, right? You have the night off?”

“Yes, I’ll make it work.”

~*~

The evening was warm, it was always warm during the summer. The afternoons bright sun had bled out, spreading warm colours across the sky, painting the white clouds pink and throwing fire into the sky. It was perfect for seeing open air theater.

Virgil’s seat wasn’t the first row, but it wasn’t the back, but he knew that it was one of the good spots from the way Roman had smiled when he handed the ticket over. The play was a comedy, side splitting laughter echoed out through the square and even Virgil lost himself in the antics on stage. He cheered extra loud when it was Romans turn to bow before curtains.

~*~

Summer got busy. Really busy. Planning and arranging tours for the museum and scheduling events for the library seemed to be an everlasting job. Roman was busy in the afternoons preparing for the evening production, and before they knew it, the summer festival was in full swing wasn’t the small town was once again a tourist destination. The cliff still stayed empty, even when they were able to sneak off together on rare shared days off. Ice cream was usually melted and gone by the time they made their walk up.

~*~

Virgil had his head in Romans lap, the actor was resting his back against the rock, humming a melody that shifted and floated just as much as his own wandering fingers on his ukulele. Virgil had his eyes closed so he didn’t see Romans expression as he let out a sigh at the end of a phrase. He stopped his plucking and cracked open an eye seeing Romans fond gaze.

“What?” he asked.

Roman shook his head. “I dunno, nothing really. You just seem happy right now, and its nice.”

“I do?”

“To me, you seem happy. You’re more relaxed, and there’s a way that you hold yourself that just projects that you are more comfortable. Its nice.”

“Oh, it’s been something I’ve been working on for some time, I even counted it a little bit to a new year’s resolution to make a commitment.”

“Well, I think you have everyone beat on that resolution part.”

“Nah, I bet there’s some people from last year who’re still going, what about you?”

Roman shrugged a shoulder. “I did my best; I’d tried to draw or write something at least once a week. I got busy and forgot about it. I still try to do it though.”

“It’s the thought that counts.” Virgil plucked out a cord, hands shifting on the neck. It was peaceful on the cliff, still, not a shift in the wind at all. The flowers were like observers to the only two there.

“There’s only a couple more runs of the play, and the festival is done in a couple more days.” Roman spoke up.

“I know.” Virgil replied. “How long do you think you’ll be in town for then?” Usually the company stayed a week after the were officially done performing, helping set down and pack up everything for the road.

“I’m not sure actually, depends on the managers and how quickly everything gets done. They both want to be gone by August 2nd.

“So not much time left then.”

“There’ll be just enough.”

“It’s never enough.”

“I know, but I am always happy to make the most of any time with you.”

“You’re a sap, you know that, right?”

“Ah, I may be a sap, but I’m your sap. And I’ll have you know you wouldn’t have it any other way.” Roman laughed and his fond expression returned.

“Here, hold this.” Virgil lifted his uke to Roman, and he got up after the actor took it. he stood up and started looking at the flowers around them.”

“What are you looking for?”

“Just a little somethin’.” A victorious smile broke out as he found a bright red flower, just on the inside of the ring. He crouched low at the edge and reached in, plucking the bloom. He sat back in front of Roman and brushed back his bangs, tucking the flower in behind his ear.

“There, I hope it stays pretty for you.”

“And you call me a sap.” Roman chucked.

Virgil shrugged and tried to hide his blush.

~*~

The festival ended with at party. The part of the town square that wasn’t occupied with the stage was in use as a dance floor, and small booths selling an assortment of treats and souvenirs lined the border. It was hectic and Virgil stayed more to the edge than not, happy to watch Roman be happy with is cast members.

A Woman settled almost too close for his personal bubble, but before he could move, she spoke.

“You’re Virgil, right?” Her tone was light, curious sounding more than anything.

“Uh, yah.” Was his eloquent reply.                  

“Nice to meet you, I’m Val, one of Romans cast mates.” She stuck out her hand to shake.

“Oh, hi.” Virgil accepted the shake, at a loss for what to say. She looked at him, and gave a nod, and as if happy with what she found.

“Roman always seems so excited to come here, and he’s always in a good mood when he’s here, and I guess you’re a part of the reason?” She gave a sly grin.

“Oh! Uh, we haven’t- uh, well, not really- but, uh…” Virgil floundered, cheeks flushing pink, and he tried to hide behind his drink.

“Don’t worry, I’m not here to give you the shovel talk, you seem like a sweet guy, and you make Roman happy. I just wanted to see what’s he’s so happy about. He’s like a brother to me, and I know he can take care of himself. Sometimes he gets in such a funk, it’s nice to know that there’ll be someone who can help him out of it.”

“Oh, uh, thankyou? Roman really is wonderful. He’s a constant, even though he’s only here for a little bit.”

“He mentions it sometimes, ideas on settling down, and he always has a look in his eyes when he speaks about it, it’s the same one he gives you. I hope you both make it work.”

“Yah, me too.”

“It was nice meeting you Virgil. I hope you have a good night.” She waved and stepped away.

“You too.” He called after, and he watched her disappear into the crowd.

Roman found him halfway to midnight, giggly and half drunk, insisting to go to the cliff for the fireworks.  

They made the walk up just in time, the display was just as wonderful as the new years one. Though Virgil didn’t watch this one either, enthralled by the uninhibited excitement Roman displayed.

~*~

The set down was quick, and it was all too soon that they stood hands tangled together, and Roman pecked a good-buy kiss on his forehead.

~*~

It was two days later that Virgil saw a leaf from the tree fall, edges slightly browned and dry. For all he was concerned, it was Autumn now.

~*~

It was evening. The wind on the cliff had a cool chill to it, Virgil just hunkered down more into his hoodie. Cold fingers finding chords and plucking notes. He hummed for a bit, finding words to fit over the melody.

“Hum, hmm, cause baby, I’m a dark star,” he plucked notes, happy with the words, he scribbled them out on the page. “But I’ve got stories I could tell you, if I want to- dark star, dark star.”

He looked to the sunset, seeing the reds and purples mingle with the dark blue of the encroaching night sky, and dance on the crests of the light blue water.  

He’s just waiting for Logan and winter now.

~*~

It was always interesting to look out into the mind when it was like this. He could spy other pieces of floating empty land. Areas that were blank with no things and thoughts to decorate them, scattered here and there through the dark. Dark wasn’t quite the proper word though. It wasn’t very well lit, that was for sure, but it wasn’t a black that swallowed everything up. It was more of a fog, in a sense, where you could only see so far into the distance before the fine collection of particles became dense enough that you couldn’t see through them. And that was what it was like, a dark fog that softly clouded everything after a while.

It was pretty in a sense, and everything seemed quieter, muted, when the mindscape was separated like this. Patton could spot all the different chunks of land no matter how far back they receded. It was almost like a game, as he swung his legs back and forth over the edge, trying to name each island.

He didn’t move his gaze when someone sat down right beside him, and they kept the quiet for a couple more minutes.

“Hey,” Virgil said softly, interrupting the silence. “What are you doing over here? Aren't you cold?”

“Hey Kiddo, and no, not really.” Patton said, just as quiet.

“You look cold, and you’re shivering.”

“I am? Oh, I didn’t notice. Don’t really feel it.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? Like, really Patton, are you okay?” Virgil’s soft voice had a hint of worry.

“I think I am? I mean, nothing bad or wrong is happening, so I think I’m okay?” Patton said hesitantly.  

“Are you sure its just that?”

“Well, things have been feeling pretty flat lately, but nothing too bad. I guess there just not much to feel right now. Plus, Logan and Roman are working well together right now, keeping on top of things and all of that stuff.”

“I guess.” Virgil trailed off sounding unsure.

“It’s not bad at all, things have just settled. And so, there’s not much to feel and I'm just, here.” He gestured to the faded and foggy surroundings.

“Just here, sitting at the edge of the commons, swinging your legs back and forth, shivering cold. Are you sure you are okay Patton? I felt a lot of, well, sadness isn’t quite the word, and you're the only one here.”

“Sadness isn’t the word, you're right in that. I think its apathy, actually.” The moral trait said with a soft sort of acceptance.

“Wait, apathy, you’re not-" alarm shot through Virgil's voice.

“No, I'm still all good,” Patton cut off Virgil, halting the worry before it could even get to far. “I mentioned it earlier, everything is feeling settled. Roman and Logan have a lot of control right now, and there really isn't much to feel. So, it is like I'm flat, and I am just sitting here. Not really doing anything. I’m still happy, I'm still sad, its just really muted right now. Sometimes, with that, I just get tired. And it’s not a tired a sleep would take away right away, but one of rest. And right now, that is okay. I think you're feeling some of that also, just feeling like there isn’t much to be concerned about, right?” the moral trait just looked out at the landscape, weariness clear on his face and dull in his eyes, not seeing Virgil’s unease.

“Some what I guess, in the sense that there isn't much to worry about. And for the tiredness, I know, I needed a rest too. But if you’re not really feeling anything at all, then how did I feel what your feeling, if apathy is a lack of feeling in the first place?”

“I don’t thing you felt the apathy Virgil, but maybe rather the change that brought it on. It has been a while since this type of calm has settled and I know you mentioned once that unexpected ease like this can sometimes make you uneasy.”

“I did say that once, didn’t I? I didn’t really think anyone heard me, or if they did, it wasn’t something that they would remember.” Virgil admitted.

“I remember that stuff kiddo. I remember a lot of things all you guys say, I'm not the dad for nothing.” Patton tried for a smile, but it was small and it fell all to quickly.  

“That, that’s really nice to here Patton. And if you’re the dad, you need to learn that its important to keep yourself healthy too. Your shivering up a storm here.”

“I still don't feel it.”  

“You may not feel it, but I can see it. We should go get you warmed up or something.”

“I like it here though, its pretty. Can we stay a few more moments, please?”

Virgil sighed and scooted closer to him, wrapping an arm across Patton’s lower back, letting the heart snuggle into his hoodie. “Just a few more moments, but after that we're going. I'm not letting you get any colder than you are right now— but you're right, it is pretty.”

They sat, and if by the time they stood up, and Patton had a smile that wasn’t false, and he wasn’t shivering as much anymore, then sometimes feeling flat may not be the worst thing.  

“Hey Ro,” he said back, it really was peacefully quiet, in general really. Virgil and Logan were in the living room. Both were leaning over the book Roman had gifted their third. It was an enchanted book, one he had specially created about astronomy. One that would update and accumulated the information that Thomas learnt in his new course. It also had the space for cool graphics and film that was showed in class and moving image diagrams. They both looked fascinated by what was on the page.

It was that in between time of Christmas and New Years. The holiday vibe still hung in the air like the scent of pine sap, cinnamon and ginger, but like anything, was slowly fading like the short days light. People were itching to get moving again, to progress, yet wanting to hang suspended in the time where they were. Unwrapped gifts were still in groupings waiting to be looked at again. He had received a really neat notebook from Logan that he had yet to crack open again. The fridge was filled with leftovers and the counter was littered with half finished trays of treats. It was peaceful, the in between time was perfect to sit and not worry about what was going to happen next. Even Virgil didn’t seem as tense right now.

“You did good, ya know?” Patton said gently, after taking a sip of his warm drink.

“Hmm?” he hummed, tilting his head.

“The decorations, the gifts, Virgil’s Birthday, everything went really well. I’m proud of you.”

“Well, it’s a special year, I had to put on the best.” He looked back to Virgil and Logan as they flipped a page of already known knowledge, and one of the many images of the milky way night sky popped up, and Roman saw how their eyes twinkled with stars like the book showed, even if their wonder filled expressions stayed small.

“Every year is special, but I agree, this one more than usual. It would have been good any way if something didn’t work out.”  

“I know, but still, I wanted his first Christmas to be a good one, and his birthday.”

“Ya, there’s a lot to make up for.” Patton sighed, a low breath that had his shoulders drooping a little.

“There is, but, you all okay Pat?”

He received a curious head tilt.

“I mean, how are you? You are feeling all fine? Or…”

“Oh, ya, I’m good, it was a little crazy the couple days before hand, ya know. With the video and shopping, but now. It’s all good. We got to see family and visit. Friends are all good. The video was received very well and we got some shorts out, thanks to you. So, everything’s all… ya know.”

“Peaceful?”

“Peaceful.”

“Do you think the others would like a cup of coco?” he nodded to the half full pot of previously boiled water, canister of hot chocolate powder open on the counter beside it. Virgil flipped a page again and Logan pointed out something interesting on it, making their fourth nod and point something else out on the page. Their small smiles growing a little.

“Maybe, let them have some time together, Virgil is finally looking as calm as he can be, especially with the stress from earlier in the week. And Logan is not working over any schedule right now, they’re both having fun.” Patton replied softly, and took another sip from his cup.

Roman nodded, moving to make himself a cup. “Yes, good idea. Are you ready for New Years?”

“Are we?” Patton asked, shrugging.

“I’d like to think so. We got goodies and chips, so we don’t need to go to the store, and the normal friend group is coming over, everything like normal.”

“So then were good, no worries.”

“Well, we can’t ensure that our resident worrywart will not, but we can do our best.” He stirred in a couple spoonsful of powder, the fresh sweet smell wafting up. He smiled lightly as he returned to his spot, taking his own sip of coco.

“It will be good-” Patton was interrupted by a large yawn, hand moving to cover his mouth.

“Tired?”

“Kind of, what time is it?”

“Almost half past one in the morn,” he grinned, craning his head to see the clock.

“Well, our sleep schedule is non-existent.” He replied with a light giggle.

“When did we ever have a sleep schedule?”

“When we were straight.”

“Ah-” Roman snickered at the joke. “So never then.”

“Yup.” They stayed quiet, leaning on the counter, taking sips of coco and glances of Virgil and Logan enjoying the book. They would go to bed soon, Thomas, everyone needed their sleep, but no one wanted to yet. It was that time when the clock was more a decoration than anything, and ticking hands hung still in between the holiday madness. Where things progress slowly, inevitably, but it was good progress nether less.

If anything, it was peaceful.