Beneath Gunmetal Skies - Chapter 68
Marcus knows his role on his team: heâs the one who carries the gun, makes the hard calls - and takes the hits. He has no time or patience for anyone or anything else. But when Jake - a brand-new recruit Marcus has been tasked with training - messes up on his first mission and gets them both captured, nothing could prepare Marcus for the way his world quickly spirals out of control.
AO3
Masterlist
This is a series. Start here, continued from here.
Levy: (historical) the act of enlisting someone for military service
Contents: hypervigilance, lashing out at caretaker, reunion, trauma reveal, discussion on noncon, PTSD, dissociation, perseveration, head injury, STD testing, medical exam, bruises, guilt, gonna tag nsfwhump
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Stashing the transport had gone off without a hitch â and Marcus was trying not to let paranoia creep into his mind about that. It was in the next town over, burning on the edge of a cornfield.
Marcus did feel a little guilty about the cornfield. But ditching it anywhere in the town risked being caught on camera, and he simply could not risk that. Maybe the farmer would get a good settlement from the trillionaire asshole who slapped his name on the stupid fucking transports with their stupid fucking timebomb batteries. A quiet settlement would probably be a better outcome than having it plastered over the news that yet another one caught fire and couldnât be put out for days.
Again.
The train ride back had gone off without a hitch, too. Marcus had jogged from the train station to Larsâs house â a route he knew intimately now, after spending weeks wandering this town with nothing better to do than waste time waiting for his shoulder to heal. The jog took about thirty minutes, and the train ride had taken an hour. This whole thing had taken only three hours, all told.
Plenty of time for AMTEC to find Larsâs house, find Jake, and shoot him to death where he lay.
Plenty of time for Jake to die of his injuries, if Lars had missed something â or if Marcus had simply been too late in getting him to them.
His shirt was entirely soaked through as he rounded the corner onto Larsâs street. He began to sprint as he saw Larsâs house. Nothing seemed amiss; the door was still in its frame, the lights on, no strange vehicles on the street. The place looked as normal as it had yesterday.
Things had looked mostly normal at the train station, too.
Marcus ran up Larsâs driveway and tried to open the front door. Frustration and relief both crashed through him as the handle refused to turn. He banged on the door.
âItâs me,â he called.
After a few seconds, the lock scraped, and the door opened. Lars stood in the doorway, looking like theyâd seen a ghost.
Marcus paled. âNo.â The word left him like air after someoneâs been punched. He stepped over the threshold. Lars moved in front of him.
âMarcus, wait,â they said urgently. âHeâs okay, heâs alive, butââ
âLet me see him,â Marcus said. His hands shook. His flesh-and-blood arm ached â and he knew it was because he needed to be holding Jake.
âYou can, I just think we should talk first,â Lars said. They stepped in front of him again.
Desperation, clean and strong, surged through Marcusâs body. He shoved Lars out of his way, pinning them against the wall so hard they grunted. Their head cracked against the plaster. He brushed past them and went to Jakeâs room. Dread churned in his stomach. He prepared himself for blood.
He prepared himself for a missing limb.
The Jake he found still had all his limbs, and had no more blood on him than when Marcus left. He looked so small in the bed, all gangly six-foot-two of him. He raised his gaze to Marcus when he came in, but his eyes didnât focus. Marcus went to his knees beside the bed and cradled Jakeâs head. The swelling around his eye had gone down a little bit, but the bruising on his face was even worse.
âHey, Jake,â he said softly. âIâm back. Youâre okay.â
Jake stared at Marcus, lips forming silent words for an uncomfortably long time.
âM-Marcus,â he finally croaked.
âYeah, Jake,â Marcus said, lifting Jakeâs fingers to his lips and kissing them. âTold you Iâd come back, right?â He felt the air change as Lars came into the room behind him. His hackles rose, but he didnât tear his gaze from Jake.
âP-please donât leave,â Jake said, his voice raw, like heâd been crying for hours.
âNot planning on it,â Marcus said. âIâm all yours. Except for bathroom breaks, I donât have to leave you again, okay?â
âIt hurts,â Jake sobbed. Tears ran from his eyes and down his temples, pooling in his ears.
Marcus lifted his head, still not looking away from Jake. âHey, do you think he could get more of thatââ
âTh-they raped me,â were the next words out of Jakeâs mouth.
Agony blazed through Marcus from skull to spine. His fingers locked hard on Jakeâs hand. He was frozen in place; he couldnât have moved if he tried. But he shouldnât be touching Jake, he⌠he tried to kill Jake, after Jake touched him when he was like this. After Jake knew.
He couldnât make himself let go. He couldnât force his fingers to release. âTheyâŚâ he croaked.
Jake began to sob. âB-Brady and Surles,â he said. âThey raped me, it⌠it hurt.â
Marcus was shaking. He could feel the room spinning around him, could feel the air freezing in his lungs, but he couldnât do a thing to make it all stop. He swallowed. The air got caught halfway down.
âI-I⌠I begged them to stop,â Jake whimpered in a broken voice. âI couldnât make them stop.â
There was a knife in his chest, and every word was twisting it harder. âJakeâŚâ
Jake wailed softly, rolling closer to Marcus as he shook apart. Marcus froze for a moment; he shouldnât touch Jake. The knowledge felt base-level, as simple as his own name.
Like an even deeper reflex, Marcusâs arms moved on their own. He gathered Jake close and held him against his chest. Jakeâs tears wet his shirt. Marcus felt the echo of disgust, as if he was borrowing something he thought Jake should have. Jake only pulled him closer.
âI⌠I wanted to warn you,â Lars said timidly from the doorway.
Marcus was beyond words. He felt their absence, practically heard the crackling, vicious snap of words that he would have thrown back at them if he was able. He couldnât even form them in his mind. All he heard and felt was screaming horror. He held Jake tight and rocked him â more instinct, motions he didnât care to question or stop â eyes wide with grief and guilt as he stared at the wall.
âM-Marcus,â Jake whimpered as his fingers gripped Marcusâs shirt. âMarcus.â
Marcus swallowed hard. âHmm,â he croaked out, just to show Jake he was there.
Slowly, Jakeâs sobs eased. Marcus laid him back down on the bed and stroked his fingers through Jakeâs sweaty, tangled hair. Jake raised fogged eyes to Marcusâs once more. He felt his heart crack in his chest.
âMarcus,â Jake murmured.
âHere,â Marcus said flatly.
âPlease donât leave,â Jake whispered.
Marcus shook his head. âAlready said.â His fingers gently traced Jakeâs brow, his nose, his chin. âNot going anywhere.â
âIt hurts,â Jake said softly.
Marcusâs nostrils flared. âI know,â he said, turning to Lars. âCan he please getââ
Lars was staring at them both in horror.
âThey raped me,â Jake said, in that same broken voice as before.
Marcus turned back to Jake and watched him devolve into sobs once again. His heart thundered in his chest. âWh-why is he doing that?â he breathed.
Lars stepped fully into the room, hands tucked into their armpits. âHeâs perseverating,â they said, mouth drawn. âAsking repetitive questions, saying repetitive things. Itâs a sign of head injury. Heâs got⌠a pretty bad concussion.â
Marcus stared at Jake with dread tingling in his chest. âHow long⌠has he been like this?â
âSince a few minutes after you left.â Larsâs voice sounded dry and dead.
Tears pricked at Marcusâs eyes. âAnd how longâŚ?â
âHard to say,â Lars said weakly. âMaybe a few hours. Maybe a few days. There isnât much to do but monitor him. He can sleep; not letting them sleep is a myth. Sleeping might be good for him, actually.â
Jake was already beginning to settle again. âWh-what else did he tell you?â Marcus said. The tears in his eyes fell down his cheeks.
âPretty much just that,â Lars said. ââWho are you?â âWhere is Marcus?â âIt hurts.â âThey raped me.â And then talked about the rape a bit, sometimes. Just that, over and over again for three hours. So.â They shrugged and rubbed the back of their head.
Marcusâs brows twitched together. âIâm sorry,â he rasped. âFor⌠for hurting you.â
âItâs fine, dude,â Lars said. âI shouldnât have stopped you. Now we should, umâŚâ They stared at the floor, arms crossing across their chest. âWe really should⌠test him for⌠well. Everything. I already pulled some blood and sent that to the clinic under a false name. But the other stuffâŚâ They chewed their lip. âItâs⌠a swab, around and just slightly in his, um⌠his anus. But I didnât want to⌠to do that, until you got back.â
More static in Marcusâs brain. It was hard to think.
Lars spread their hands. âItâs important, Marcus,â they said heavily.
Marcus blinked. âYeah.â His mouth was so dry. He stood, only for long enough to kick off his boots.
âM-Marcus?â Jake breathed.
Marcus was shaking as he climbed into bed beside Jake and smoothed his fingers through Jakeâs hair. âHey, Jake. We⌠just need to get a quick swab, okay? Just a quick swab, to see if you caught anything. Itâll be fast.â His eyes flicked to Lars. âRight?â
They were already putting on gloves. âItâll be fast,â they said, unwrapping what looked like a long q-tip. They knelt beside the bed, on Jakeâs other side. âJake, could we â could Marcus â pull your pants down for just a second? Just for long enough for me to swab you? Just a little pressure around your anus, and then Iâll be done.â
Jake looked at Marcus, his eyes huge and trusting. Marcusâs throat swelled as Jake nodded weakly. Marcus drew the blanket back and, with one hand, carefully eased Jakeâs sweatpants down off his hips.
He didnât mean to look. He didnât. But his eyes landed on the bruises that marked Jakeâs hipbones. He saw the clear shape of each finger that had gripped Jake, the deep blue color that meant the bruises were only a few days old.
Marcus gasped softly and pressed his face into Jakeâs temple. Jake turned his head, whimpering softly, and ground his forehead against Marcusâs.
âJust bend your knees up for me?â Lars murmured.
âI gotcha,â Marcus said. He cradled Jake tightly. âItâs okay.â
Jakeâs breath caught. His fingers tightened in Marcusâs shirt.
âI gotcha.â It was a promise, and a plea. âI gotcha.â
âAnd weâre done,â Lars said, snapping the swab off into a specimen tube.
Marcus tugged Jakeâs pants back up and covered them both with the blanket. Jake rolled onto his side, burying his face in Marcusâs neck.
Lars finished prepping the swap and stripped off their gloves. âI can⌠leave you two alone, if you want,â they said. They headed for the door.
âMarcus?â Jake whimpered in Marcusâs arms.
âLars,â Marcus said roughly. They paused. âI⌠I really am sorry. And grateful. Heâd be dead⌠weâd both be dead, if not for you. AndâŚâ He dashed tears from his eyes. âHeâs⌠heâs myâŚâ His throat threatened to close.
âYeah,â Lars said. âHeâs yours. I get it. And for the record⌠he cares about you, too. Head injuries can make people act weird, but⌠this isnât that. He loves you. More than life. Hope you know that.â They turned without another word and stalked out of the room.
Marcusâs chest ached as Jake trembled in his arms. âMarcus,â he whispered. âPlease donât leave.â
âI wonât,â he said, trailing his metal fingers across Jakeâs forehead. His sweaty shirt clung to his skin, but he didnât care. âIâm not going anywhere, Jake.â
âIt hurts.â
âI know. I know it does, Jake. But Iâm here. I gotcha.â
A sob. âThey r-raped me.â
âI know.â A kiss into Jakeâs hair. âI know, Jake.â A kiss against his forehead. âIâm so⌠fuck, Iâm sorry.â
âThey raped me, Marcus, th-they cuffed me and⌠I s-screamedâŚâ
Marcus shuddered as a sob of his own broke through him. âIâm sorry,â he said. âI should have come for you sooner. Iâm so sorry. Iâm so fucking sorry, Jake.â
âI wanted you to come for me. Even when I thought you w-were⌠dead.â Jakeâs grip was so weak on his shirt.
Marcus thought he might break apart from shame. âIâm here now,â he offered pathetically.
Jake sobbed against his chest. âMarcus,â he whimpered. âMarcus, Marcus, Marcus.â
âIâm here,â Marcus said. âIâm here.â
âMarcus,â Jake sobbed. âPlease donât leave.â
Marcus gritted his teeth against the pain and prepared himself for another onslaught. âI wonât, Jake. I promise. I swear, Jake, you have me. Feel me, yeah? Not going anywhere.â
âIt hurts,â Jake whimpered.
âYeah, Jake.â More tears burned in Marcusâs eyes. âI know.â
Continued here
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