Jul 5, 2016
Parenthood: when you have to explain the finer points of why it's important to wipe your butt EVERY TIME you poop.
Loading...
seen from Malaysia
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Japan
seen from Philippines
seen from Yemen
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from Germany
seen from Yemen
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from T1
Parenthood: when you have to explain the finer points of why it's important to wipe your butt EVERY TIME you poop.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Kids & Being on time...
Before kids: wake up at 845/9 to leave at 930 for a 10 am appointment. One kid: wake up at 815/830 to leave at 930 for a 10 am appointment (ok..maybe 940...) Two kids: wake up at 715 to hopefully leave by 930 for a 10 am appointment. Will probably be 15 min late.
Wild adulting
From: Wife Sent: Monday 12:20 PM To: Husband Subject: Adorable Little man just did the cutest thing. He ate all his oranges and pretzels and had to eat five bites of fried rice to get a peep. So I fed him 5 big bites. Each time we would count how many that was. I even asked him how many were left (subtraction and lunch!)-which he did really well. Then he ate his five and got a peep. I came back down w my bowl of rice and he says "mama. Five bites. You five bites!" And then proceeded to count what I ate. He's adorable ---- From: Husband Sent: Monday 12:22 PM To: Wife Subject: re: Adorable If you want a peep, I'd suggest you listen ---- From: Wife Sent: Monday 12:25 PM To: Husband Subject: re: Adorable I'm a fucking grown up. If I want to responsibly eat my rice and then Easter candy so I will minimize my heartburn- I will damnit!
One pup, Two different senses of humor...
To: Husband From: Wife Date: January 28, 2015 at 1:23 pm
Subject: Le Sigh...
So our lovely new puppy is quite tenacious and semi-ingenious
TWICE today she has seen food (left overs from the toddler's lunch or cookies on my desk) that were left all alone with no one to watch them.
TWICE she got enough of her self UP AND ON the counter/desk to try to get said items.
Try 1-sucess. Her and Bella the Beagle enjoyed left over sour cream, quesadillas, and left over fruit cup juice.
Try 2- She knocked my books to the ground but did not get her cookie.
This dog would have been the inspiration for Maya Angelou's next book (if she was alive)…
Introducing...
I know why the caged dog howls….
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To: Wife From: Husband Date: January 28, 2015 at 1:29 pm
Subject: RE: Le Sigh...
You and Jolly are both hilarious. Â We should put a plate of cookies in a tantalizing range on the counter, and then grease all of the edges with crisco. Â Set up a camera and earn out funniest video money.
What's the word?
Husband:(coming home from the grocery store). They didn't have any of those....uh....what is it? It's a meat bath...
Me: wha-
Husband: marinade! (Pause) Jesus. Am I so tired that I called a marinade a meat bath?!
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
wild things!
Me: we should stay up as late as we can tonight and watch as many episodes of supernatural as possible.
Husband: sounds great. We might get 1.5 in and go crazy!
After seeing a mom cave on a commercial...
Husband: you can't have a mom cave.
Me: well you can't have a dad cave.
Husband: I can have a man cave. So you can have a lady cav-oh. Hmmm. You may already have one of those.
Voice texting is more polite than my husband!