#snacksized

His predicament was exactly what System said: he was in the modern world. But between the urgency and suddenness of the panel's offer, he didn't really consider everything that came with going back to his body. Even though Shang Qinghua was a cisgender man, Xiang Fei was not. The idea settled weirdly in his bones. He wasn't transphobic or anything- literally, how could he be- but at the very minimum, he was uncomfortable again.

He didn't quite know what bothered him first. The knowledge he had a chest with breasts bigger than he'd preferred, or the way he expected to get misgendered all the time once more. Actually, he got sort of good at passing right before he died. He did it by only wearing things like hoodies and jeans, settling for the bare minimum of effort, not even washing his hair or trying to look alive- and suddenly he would get called a man when the grocery store cashier was ringing up his ridiculous amount of discounted energy drinks.

But now he was at the hospital. And it was notorious for being a place where you stay as long as you need, and you leave as soon as you can. So of course, there wasn't a reason to even try to correct the nurse that came by his room, "Ma'am?" She smiled, "Oh good, you're awake!"

"Yeah," Airplane swallowed, his throat feeling dry. "I suppose I am." He met her gaze. "Was I unconscious for long?"

"Our reports estimate that you were in a coma for just over two days. You were brought in by one of your neighbors." Her voice was too clinging, too kind, as she stated, "It's nice to see you're doing okay, electrocution can be a messy thing." She shook her head with wide eyes as if she had interesting stories about other patients. Regardless, she continued, "A young woman like you deserves a nice, long life ahead of her. It would be a shame to go so soon."

If he was being honest, he didn't even feel uncomfortable at first. But it was only because he wasn't aware he was being spoken about. It was a long silence where she had to verify he was still listening before he blinked rapidly. "Oh right, yes!" He awkwardly laughed and scratched the back of his neck, feeling pinpricks of tingling in his dominant hand. "Yeah, sorry, I'm still getting my bearings."

"Of course! Disorientation can be common." She tapped her clipboard. "Well, I would ask more questions, but I was actually on my way to move you to your reassigned room." She professionally chuckled to fill the air. "So we'll have to move over there first. Let's get you walking."

Xiang Fei struggled for a few steps, his legs lightly wobbling beneath him like a newborn giraffe walking on strawberry jello. However, with the nurse steadying him by the arm, he was able to make it mostly on his own to the elevator. As they ascended, he asked, "Not to sound rude, but when can I get out of here?"

She smiled. "In a rush to get back?"

"In a way." He still didn't feel like he was in his body, but looking in the mirror wouldn't give him any relief. All he felt was uncomfortableness- an annoyingly sticky experience that made him hunch his shoulders and try to avoid the chest that he now possessed. He wished it was some crude porn plot, where he could enjoy his feminine genitalia and all of its wonders. But damn, he also missed having his flat chest and being able to simply exist without feeling bad.

Even if he wished for a more romanticizable scene, his lower half actually didn't bother him that much. To be direct: It was the place he peed. A penis was more practically useful sometimes, but eh, an innie instead of an outie was fine too.

Unfortunately, no matter what neutrality he could possess, his upper half stuck out like a sore thumb. He didn't even like thinking about the terminology again, that he would have to wear sports bras to make himself a little smaller. And of course within the hospital gown, he didn't have a bra on. He just felt a bit gross.

The nurse kept talking, "If you score well on your leaving assessment, I expect you to be dismissed within the next hour or so. This is just to help get you any referrals for physical therapies you might need."

"I won't need those."

Her face tightened slightly, not as if Xiang Fei's objection was surprising but that it was common enough that she had a script already in mind. "The assessment can be very beneficial. It'll be quick and it can't hurt to have everything on record."

Before he could respond with anything else, the elevator doors dinged and slid open. He silently walked with the nurse through the hallways, where the sterile, white lighting had been substituted for more windows and natural sunlight. As soon as he stepped inside, he realized it was quieter and more spacious than his previous room. While he had heard and seen pictures of the 'VIP' hospital rooms, he never quite expected to be standing in one.

And now it was quiet enough that he could hear himself exhale.

The guy in the bed looked up from his phone, "Xiang Fei?"

"Yeah, that's me." He sat on the empty bed, feeling small in the room. It was cold, but every hospital was cold, he supposed.

The nurse connected him to the heart monitor, ensuring everything was in place before she checked the time and bashfully said, "Actually, I have something else I need to get to. I'll be back in a moment, ma'am!" And that was it. She left.

The man next to him glanced over, his glasses hanging slightly off his nose bridge. "I'm Peerless Cucumber, if it's not obvious."

"O- oh, cool!" But all he could think about was how he was speaking in his higher-pitched voice after getting misgendered in front of the most relentless critic he had ever known. The one that would type out 'kys' over the forums like he was going for a world record of some kind. The one that pointed out the weird biology of the plants that would induce plots that switched a future wife's genitalia.

The one that was… sort of homophobic? Yet also gay, though the latter aspect didn't make his shoulders drop that much. While he was sitting with a neutral expression, the heart monitor snitched on him as it beeped a little quicker.

Shen Yuan turned off his phone, and Xiang Fei, for some reason, tensed as if he was about to face criticism for merely existing. However, the man only asked, "Does your family know you're awake?"

Xiang Fei looked away, staring at a small basket of assorted carnations. "Probably not." He didn't talk to his family much. He'd blame that on them starting new families and having their step-kids, but the rift started during his teenage years around the divorce.

He barely remembered coming out to them. All that came to mind was that it was a quiet, brief conversation where he was left with too many emotions once it was done.

When did you decide this?

Aww, but you're so beautiful…

I thought I knew everything too when I was a kid. Don't worry, you're still my daughter to me.

Nothing changed. He supposed he was grateful that he didn't get shunned completely once he cut his hair short, but at every family gathering, he was stuck with his old gender slapping him in the face.

He smiled. He quietly laughed. And he slowly stopped showing up to events. However, he also stopped getting invited, so it worked out for him.

"Bro, you okay?"

His chestnut eyes dashed to Shen Yuan. "Yeah, why?"

"You just seem… quiet, I guess."

It was easier to be quiet. Can't face harassment if there was nothing to harass, so he never spoke about his gender to the readers. All he really alluded to was a dick, but that was when he was telling Peerless Cucumber 'suck it' in various iterations. He still thought it was a little funny, and it led to the oddest thing: Peerless Cucumber would go off of the forums to complain on other sites about Proud Immortal Demon Way, and Xiang Fei still remembers,

I can only recommend the first 56 chapters (or maybe up to 83); after that, the author is a deranged, perverted hack- he can't even remember the names of his characters!

He smiled.

That was probably stupid. But being stupid never stopped him before; he felt better about the world.

Then he realized that Shen Yuan still called him his bro. Maybe a force of habit? Maybe the guy viewed 'bro' as a gender neutral word?

Shen Yuan tapped on the medical cot. "What do you plan to do?"

"About…?" His gender? The transition he couldn't afford?

"Being back," he lightly scoffed.

"Uh, maybe some writing?" Shen Yuan rolled his eyes. "No, bro," It sounded weird from his feminine voice, "I swear it'll be good! For a while I was thinking about a way to improve the plot by expanding on Tianlang Jun and Zhuzhi Lang and-" He shrugged, figuring it was best not to spoil everything. "I think you'll like it."

Shen Yuan's eyes were bright, even if he still had a smug look on his face. "We'll see." But as soon as the friendliness lingered in the air, he swatted it away by hissing out, "You better not be ragebaiting."

"I'm not." He lightly laughed, though his chest was tight from… the gender stuff. Maybe his Cucumber-bro was just waiting until they were out of the hospital to say something? He at least tried not to let the quietness grow more rumination in his mind as he asked, "What about your family?"

The man gave a curt nod. "I live with my sister, so she was the one to bring me here. My parents plan to pick me up, but my brothers are out of the country for work." He checked his phone then moved it to the side table to plug it in. "The one thing I really like about the modern world is texting. You should've written that in."

Xiang Fei raised an eyebrow. "Weren't you the same reader complaining about me adding enderpearls?"

Shen Yuan's face went aflame as his mouth widened, "That was straight-up copyright infringement! I could've had Mojang sue you!!"

He leaned back as he typically would, his arms behind his head in a stretched state of leisure before he realized his chest was… Existing, for lack of a better word. Like an inconvenient boner, it was showcasing itself through the fabric. He quickly shifted his position into a temporary stretch and crossed his arms.

Shen Yuan's phone chimed, causing the man to take a peek at it. He rolled his eyes with a gentle exhale. "I missed my sister."

"I'm happy you can talk to her again," he tried.

"Me too." He looked up from his phone. "Maybe you two should talk, I think you guys would get along."

Xiang Fei's face twisted into a cringe.

"What?"

As if the analytical reader didn't know exactly what he said? Xiang Fei pursed his lips. Reluctantly, "You wouldn't have said that earlier, so it's weird for you to say it now."

Shen Yuan looked at him like he was stupid. "She wasn't a transmigrator."

"No, I mean-" His entire body was tensed into itself, pressing his arms down on his chest and his knees drawn close. "Because you found out," he forced himself to say.

"Because I found out," the man repeated. Every word was just a reminder of how different their voices were. The excitement and dramatic whiny flair in Shang Qinghua's voice was always gender-affirming, even if not stereotypically masculine, but now he was left with the desire to keep his voice low for a resemblance of what he used to have.

He didn't want to lose one of his only friends, but he accepted it as he quietly said, "Don't act like you don't know."

Shen Yuan squinted at him. "I can't clarify if I don't even know what we're talking about."

"Bro..." He felt as if he had to carefully select his words like an essay with limited sources worth his entire grade. No matter the vocabulary or how long he catered to the cisgender person, it was inevitable to receive that bitter lack of acceptance. Even if he took a step back from the echo chamber of social media, his parents were direct proof of his apprehensions. "Why are you dragging this out?"

"What do you mean??" Because of course his reader was in the right- he always was. "Airplane," he insisted, "Tell me what you're talking about. Don't make me come over there and hit you." He picked up a magazine as evidence, but in the same way that eyes sometimes didn't meet a smile, the threat wasn't made with the tightening of the critic's fist.

He looked away, trying to decide how to start it, "The nurse."

"Yeah?"

"Called me ma'am."

The air was quiet for a long time. Shen Yuan sounded less sure as he confirmed, "Yes?"

Well… there wasn't much else to say. If Peerless Cucumber would write paragraphs praising the double-meaning of his word choices and the way the symbolism connected back to previous chapters, then the critic was surely smart enough to connect the dots. Xiang Fei's voice was dry. "Yeah."

Shen Yuan's face suddenly dropped from expectant curiosity to a more deadpan look. He took off his glasses and pinched his nose bridge. His eyes were screwed shut as he sighed. "Airplane." The writer waited. "Are you a man or a woman?" The tone was flat, bordering on irritation.

So Xiang Fei couldn't help his small voice, feeling like he was walking into a minefield of discourse as he defended, "Man."

"Okay, then that's it, bro." He looked at Airplane and slid his glasses on. "I don't care what the nurse says, it's what you are that matters."

Oh.

He smoothly exhaled, relief flooding into his veins. Then Xiang Fei realized that it was the first time he came out in person with a reaction so… good. In the way that nothing was different, instead of accusing him of being a liar the entire time or within a state of confusion that drove him to the absurd conclusion.

He chuckled a bit, his shoulders dropping. He softly provided, "Thanks."

Shen Yuan rolled his eyes. "You're not the first trans person; my brain isn't going to explode." He furrowed his brow. "You wrote Liu Qingge to be transgender, why were you being so dramatic??"

Xiang Fei's mouth dropped. "You knew?!"

"Yes??" He looked away. "Well, I saw it discussed in the comments. I… wasn't naturally drawn to that type of conclusion."

Fair enough, it felt similar to how Xiang Fei didn't realize some characters were trans-coded. Though when he scanned his memories, he ended up asking, "You never pointed it out."

"Why would I?"

Xiang Fei blinked, slowly starting, "You had that whole…. Heterosexual Binghe arc."

Shen Yuan cringed. "Don't call real-life things an 'arc.'"

"No, but for real, a week after the wedding, you tried to convince me he's straight!"

"The protagonist-" Shen Yuan paused, trying to come up with a reasonable argument, "Is different."

Shen Yuan's Mental Olympics: 1

Xiang Fei: 1

He still huddled in on himself to naturally hide his chest from showing too much, but he didn't mind raising his voice slightly as he complained, "Now I'm tempted to make him canonically bisexual in the new material I'll write."

Shen Yuan stammered. "You can't!"

"What, are you biphobic or something?" Xiang Fei rolled his eyes. "He was always bi, but I knew my readers wanted that hetero shit, so I supplied it." He exhaled and muttered, "Mostly male readers. It was obvious that all of them were just going to jerk off to whatever woman was getting debased in that chapter."

Shen Yuan raised a finger. "Number one: Not all," he gestured to himself before putting up another finger, "And two: You mean to tell me, you-" He gestured to Xiang Fei's entire form, "Are knowledgeable about…" He cutely didn't understand how to phrase it, "…Non-male experiences," he settled on, "And you wrote the wives like that???"

"A writer's gotta eat! Adjectives and enhanced boob physics help add words!"

He also found that some decisions came with residual pain, like ripples after a rock was tossed onto a lake, less than the original impact, but still noticeable. He’d be midway through a document before the daggers slowly dipped into his neck and shoulders, easy to brush off at first.

But it got worse, because of course it did. He felt the pain rise, but he only stopped trying to read once he couldn’t bear it anymore. He put down his quill, barely paying mind to properly put it back into place before he clutched his temples and closed his eyes with a quiet whine. It wasn’t inherently a high pain level this time around, but the low light in his room seemed practically torturous. 

He contemplated a break, but the only apparent difference would be whether the document was filled out or not. Pained in bed or pained at his desk? He juggled the options before opening his eyes to the too-bright room and shifted through the papers. A deadline, a due date, a- fuck him. Well actually, he’d prefer a fuck or die plot over the papers needing to be completed by that evening. Ideally, he might’ve been able to pass it on to someone else, but it was too short-notice by now. 

A dark thought whispered that he didn’t have anyone to ask anyway, but he pushed that as far away as possible. He absolutely had bitches up the wazoo- he swallowed uncomfortably and tried to sit up straight in his chair, but even that made his bones ache. He was so dead, he felt like he was dying, why can’t modern medicine exist??

Wait.

It was either the stupidest request or the smartest one, and he would bet on the latter. He groggily called out, “System?”

A translucent blue screen popped in front of him, but it felt too bright to attempt to read. He felt ever so thankful for the voiced narration, but it came with his ears being grated, the better of two evils, he supposed. 

Ah, came to request something again?

“What?”

You only talk to me to use me. o(╥﹏╥)o

Shang Qinghua struggled with the words for a moment before he let out an exasperated sigh, “You know I’ve been busy lately.”

Busy procrastinating? Or with pining after Mobei Jun? (⇎_⇎)

He narrowed his eyes, “You know exactly what I’ve been doing.”

Oh, yeah. Getting off to-

“Aaand anyway! I’ve- yeah, I’ve got an idea. Creation-y time.” He finger drummed his desk before pointing finger guns at the screen, “Ibuprofen. I’m sure you know it.”

There was silence for a few moments before a ding. Since the ding didn’t correlate to anything physically occurring, the system must’ve found a new stim, good for them.

Ibuprofen was a drug widely available during your time, often used in the treatment of pain, fever, or inflammation. (◔̯◔)☝

Shang Qinghua snapped a few times. “Bingo, bullseye, right on the money.” He waited before realizing he never got to his point, “I want some.”

The AI made a few beeps, processing or calculating- Shang Qinghua couldn’t give a shit about the semantics, but he certainly flinched when he heard a loud error sound.

That would require many other adjustments to this world, which would be unsuitable for your stay here.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Many other scientific progressions would need to be advanced to allow the discovery of that drug. 

He rubbed his head. “Isn’t this world bullshit anyway? Couldn’t we… I don’t know, make a plant?”

It would take decades to grow, discover, and utilize for medicinal properties. Are you sure you would like to proceed with this rewrite?

He groaned, “No.” He thought for a while before he dryly offered, “You said plant, so could I get weed?”

Is that your request?（￣□￣；）

“You really can’t take a joke, huh.” He sighed, mentally preparing himself for his workload before the System chimed in again.

Shang Qinghua, are you requesting ibuprofen to complete your work?

He hummed passively. 

From what you have told me about your past life, caffeine also served as a motivator to finish your duties. Perhaps coffee beans would be a reasonable substitute.

The realization flooded his mind with excitement, “Wait, yeah, that sounds good. Can you do that?”

I’ve been pre-established to control this universe as I see fit. Do you think I can’t modify transportation routes to make it arrive at the An Ding peak? (◔_◔)

“Okay, okay, smartass. Yeah, coffee would be nice.” He was about to make the formal request before cringing, “Actually- I’ve got a shitload of work. Can I…” More pain flooded him, but it didn’t feel like the System’s doing.

I don’t know, can you?

“Shut the fuck up.”

(✿◠‿◠)

It took him a while to come up with the words, “Can I… schedule things?”

I don’t see why not.

He would’ve jumped for joy if he felt more capable of sudden movement. “I’d like to request the transportation of coffee beans to the An Ding peak, but that request shall only go through after sunset.” The formal wording felt much more familiar to him, maybe a sign the paperwork wouldn’t be as bad as he thought. 

Request scheduled. (~˘˗˘)~

He figured he would go back to daily life before he mumbled, “Thank you, System.”

You’re welcome, Shang Qinghua.

The ripple migraines were weekly now. They controlled a lot of his routines, but it was manageable. The stress might’ve piled up, but the System and caffeine saved him time and time again. He honestly didn’t like coffee; he hated the bitterness, but he just pretended it was cough medicine that he was required to chug down. 

He woke up one particular day with a migraine. He felt the desperate urge to bury himself under his blankets and will it away, but he knew he had to carry forward. He didn’t start his days like this often, but it ruined anything he had in place. 

He started keeping more lists, prepping for the worst. And thank God (himself) for that. He barely moved out of bed to grab the nearby scrap of paper:

Demon Court

Ensure proper delivery to my king’s kitchen

Formalize the draft treaty

Dread dripped rhythmically to how his head pounded. He’d rather eat glass than be responsible. If anything, these were only the required things he had to do; he knew the back would read the optional, upcoming items, but he couldn’t make himself glance at that side.

But what doesn’t kill him doesn’t kill him. Time for coffee and a will to live (but the system couldn’t give him antidepressants, so double the coffee would have to do.)

He forced himself to swallow about half of his coffee concoction with a soured face before he asked, “System, how long is it until my king’s meeting?”

The system beeped a few times. 

Approximately ten minutes. (x_x)

“Ten?!” He proceeded to chug the rest of his coffee before muttering a string of curses while collecting his items. He might’ve wanted to slam his head against the wall, but he could focus on that later. He only made himself relatively presentable before rushing along his way.

He ended up arriving exactly on time, but it was far too late in his own eyes. He sat in his usual position at the right of Mobei Jun, who stared at the smaller man for a few moments before proceeding to the legislative routine. Shang Qinghua felt his eyes glaze over, but he forced himself to remain present. 

He served as a mix of an advisor and scribe; he kept note of what he needed to do and delegate, while acting as a source of knowledge whenever requested. He didn’t feel like he was good at his job, considering how quickly his attention drifted, but he relatively tried his best.

He took role, wrote an outline of topics, (almost fell asleep until Mobei Jun accidentally touched his arm while leaning for a document,) and managed to jot down the basic discussion and negotiations. For half of the scroll, he felt like a toddler struggling to spell, but it would’ve been good enough for the time being. 

Mobei Jun didn’t ask for his mental assistance, which he considered to be an absolute blessing. When court was eventually adjourned, he felt a small weight being lifted off his shoulders. It wasn’t the entire day, but it was a start. 

He felt exhausted through his core, but he forced his eyes to open wider as he focused on collecting his belongings. He double and triple checked he had everything before a sudden, deep voice startled him, “Is there a reason why my advisor still resides here?”

“Hm?” Shang Qinghua looked at the suddenly empty room to realize that he must’ve spaced out- damn it, so much for looking professional. “Oh! This servant was ensuring everything was in order before he left.”

Mobei Jun stared at him. While Shang Qinghua had a lot of experience deciphering his looks, he still couldn’t read them perfectly. He thought he saw a shred of belief on his face, but as his mind muddled around those icy eyes, he realized his king had been speaking the entire time. He forced his face to remain consistent as he caught onto the end, “-none of my personal matters.”

Shang Qinghua awkwardly laughed before he realized he didn’t know the full conversation, so he switched to a more serious, curt nod. “Of course, my king. This servant will handle it.”

Mobei Jun seemed satisfied with that response as he nodded once then walked away. Shang Qinghua didn’t even realize how tense he was during the exchange until the weariness crept upon him once more. He was sure he had most of his belongings, if not all of them, as he quickly left the courtroom. He made sure to go in the opposite direction of where the people were, the sounds were starting to explode his pain again.

Shang Qinghua wasn’t a fiend to all-nighters. Once PIDW succeeded, he started pulling more of them to keep up with his update schedule and even publish bonuses and extras for his top patrons. But in his past life, the all-nighters were just a part of his sleep schedule. He’d go about his day, and when he started writing, he just did it until he slept. It might not have been the healthiest, but he was hyperfixated enough to keep up the routine.

But at least in his past life, he had energy drinks. Those felt so much easier to drink. In the present day, his mouth only tasted of the bitter coffee he always drank. Slowly but surely, he found more efficient ways to brew it, even asking the system for tips and slight modifications to the world. 

Well- “slight” might’ve been an underexaggeration compared to the consequences of his requests. He felt like he was having a migraine or the hangover of one almost every day, and a day he was pain-free just meant he was agonizingly waiting for the warning signs. Granted, he didn’t do much when those signs came, but he was sometimes able to move to a quieter room or take a nap. 

The pain throbbed in the back of his head, but he blinked back to his surroundings. Right, a drink. He asked the System a week ago if it was able to create anything similar to caffeine powder, just something pure that could hit his system easier. He got the typical sass, but his request was granted, and he held a reasonably sized bag of white crystalline solid in front of him. 

While he was tempted to make a line and snort it, he knew he didn’t understand the dosing and measurements. He could’ve asked the System for help, but he winced at the idea. 

Regardless, he settled on adding the powder to the coffee creations. It surprisingly made the coffee somehow taste even worse, but he could push past the disgusting agony in exchange for catching up on his work. 

He let out a slow, mostly even breath. His heart was racing, but that was just motivation… right? He swallowed down the nausea and straightened his focus to the papers in front of him. He couldn’t sleep right now. Even if he suddenly grew past his stubbornness, he physically couldn’t rest for a few hours; so while he wasn’t entirely focused on his work, he at least proceeded to move along and complete what he had to. 

He was grateful he worked late into the night so no one could hear him break down over the slightest things.

He constantly felt dizzy during slow movements, but it was fine, he could still continue his responsibilities. It didn’t matter if every time he left his room, he dreaded every encounter since it would just expose how much of a fraud he was, it was fine. It didn’t matter how much he took any criticism to heart and all of the times and ways he would slip himself out of a discussion so he could cry by himself, it was fine. 

His king had called him to a private meeting. He felt pure anxiety course through his veins the moment it was told to him, but there was no use ruminating further. Maybe Mobei Jun was finally done with him- a sentiment that made his throat tight. He tried to breathe deeply, but he felt himself only closer to tears. It was fine. It was fine, why didn’t his brain just understand that he was fine??

He raised his hand to knock on the door, but he felt paralyzed to move it any closer. Of course he didn’t want to enter without knocking, his king always granted him that level of respect for some odd reason, but the action of starting the encounter just felt sickening as his stomach turned. 

He didn’t know how long he had stood there before the door opened in front of him. He was confident he didn’t move his hand, and he flinched at the sudden movement. (At least his pain was low, it didn’t hurt him much to move his head.) Mobei Jun scanned him, “Qinghua may come in.” He opened the door for Shang Qinghua to enter, but the latter didn’t feel very encouraged. But dreadfully, he knew it must come eventually as he walked into the room. 

He stood in the middle before Mobei Jun sat at a desk with a chair across from it. Shang Qinghua hesitated enough that his king interrupted his racing thoughts, “Sit.” Shang Qinghua’s lip trembled, but he willed a small smile onto his face before sitting across from the demon king. 

Mobei Jun picked up a nearby scroll and unfurled it onto the desk. Shang Qinghua’s vision blurred instinctively, but after a few sentences, he realized it was a trade agreement he wrote on… he couldn’t remember when. He looked up at Mobei Jun only to find the icy gaze piercing through him, he straightened his posture and spoke, “Y- yes, my king. This was the agreement- the trade agreement- that I wrote between- um-” Oh fuck, fuck, fuck- he could exactly see the weird guy’s face and the way he pronounced arcology, which Shang Qinghua thought was a mispronunciation of archeology for the longest time- He tried to quickly scan the text to figure out the name before Mobei Jun interrupted him, “This advisor never wrote the names.”

Did he say it out loud? He didn’t think so- it was clearly the issue that Mobei Jun was upset about, right? So that must’ve meant he knew that ahead of time. Airplane thickly swallowed and nodded. “Yes, my king. It must’ve slipped this servant’s mind. I’ll have it ready by tomorrow.” He avoided looking at his king for the longest time, instead pretending to read the document he could no longer view due to the tears forming in his eyes. He needed his brain to shut up already. He breathed carefully a few times before looking up at Mobei Jun to see the man intently staring at him. Oh no, “I- I can have it ready today instead.” He felt like a liar, but he would’ve made it work, hell- he probably could’ve asked the System to do it instead; his breath quickened.

“Tomorrow is fine.” Relief washed over him, but not enough to soothe the dull ache in the back of his mind. “But my Qinghua has gotten careless with his work.”

He wasn’t going to cry in front of Mobei Jun, he wouldn’t let himself do that right now. He waited a while before managing, “This servant is very sorry, my king.”

He needs to leave, no- he needed to leave yesterday. He roughly stood up, his vision partially going black as he did so. He urged himself to become steady. “I will draft it now, my king.” He barely waited for his balance to fully return as he rushed back to his room. He didn’t hear Mobei Jun come after him, which made sense; it wasn’t like Shang Qinghua was important, he was just a nobody that could be discarded at any time. He needed to do one thing: write the names of who he was referring to, yet he didn’t do that. The moment he was in his room, he finally let himself full-body sob, shaking and trembling from the shame he had in himself. His face hurt to move after he was done, all he could mutter was the inevitable. “System?”

The way he was able to navigate himself to his quarters and stumble towards an empty bin must’ve been a miracle as his knees buckled and he clutched the bucket for dear life. He felt himself hyperventilating, but the attempts to even his breathing just ended with increasing nausea and the knowledge that he was bound to throw up.

He vaguely tried to distract himself by thinking, but he couldn’t fucking take it anymore. He clutched the bucket in his hands and felt his throat open to make a disgusting sound, but he was unable to make any food rise. A blessing and a curse that he skipped… too many meals lately. His stomach growled at the thought, but he couldn’t bother standing to go get himself a nearby snack. 

His head swirled with misdirection as he let himself sit there curled for a moment. It took him a simple moment of reflection on how pathetic he would look to the outside observer for him to let out a small cry. Granted, there were most likely droplets in his eyes from the dry heaving as well, but it was only a starting point to the messy, hot tears that slid down his face.

He couldn’t do this, he didn’t have time for this, but he was ripping apart at the seams. He swallowed down the last bit of nausea before positioning his back against a wall. He’d get up in a minute, he’d really be soon- he should’ve been up a while ago. He fought every urge of self-preservation to get himself to stand up ( too quick too quick too quick) and desperately clutched a counter to support his full weight as his brain overflowed and exploded as a forever continuing loop. He took a shaky breath. 

His desk was right over there. It mocked him with how it must’ve been pain-free. Oh, inanimate objects, the ease they have. He blankly stumbled over to his desk before seeing a large note from his past self, “No ink left,” written in a dying trail. 

He was going to kill past Shang Qinghua for making him get ink in this state. He tried to mentally map out the pathway across the corridor before he heard a knock on his door. His heart jumped from anxiety before he answered the door.

Mobei Jun stood at the other end, perfectly composed in comparison to Shang Qinghua, who must’ve looked like hell with his messed-up hair and red, puffy eyes. His king barely furrowed his brow, “Is my Qinghua ill?”

“What?”

The demon didn’t respond, and instead put a hand up to his forehead. Shang Qinghua couldn’t hold back the small whimper as he leaned into the source. When he felt it pull away, he caught the stem and held it closer to him. It’s not like the cold made the pain go away, but it certainly made him forget about it. He stood there for an unknown amount of time before he realized what he was doing and quickly pulled away. 

The quick motion almost made him cry again, but he tried to hide his wince with a smile (which hurt more as well). He made sure his hands were directly in front of him instead of reaching out for the relief once again. (It took too much restraint not to burrow himself into his king’s chest.) “Doing good, m- my king! I uh- needed more ink. That’s right, ink.”

Mobei Jun didn’t seem to pay him much mind as he held up Shang Qinghua’s arm, examining his wrist and hand. The human’s mind ran a mile a minute, but his mental terrain was riddled with fog and speed bumps that made him blankly stand there until Mobei Jun eventually spoke. “Is Qinghua… not comfortable here?”

“No!” he said a bit too loudly. “Nonono- I’m perfectly comfortable. Everything is great,” his voice cracked but no tears fell. He couldn’t lose another shred of dignity. 

“You’re shaking.” Shang Qinghua followed his king’s line of sight to see how his hand trembled. 

“Oh,” was all he could manage. 

“Any request you make will be completed, your comfort is important.”

Request, request, request, the word echoed tauntingly in his head.

“My king is too kind, it’s-” he swallowed uncomfortably, he was not about to leak everything in that moment, “Nothing. Just a personal matter left unattended.”

Mobei Jun barely frowned, Shang Qinghua could only pick it up from being around him for so long. “If my advisor does not want to be in my presence, this king will make arrangements for all relevant work to be sent to An Ding peak.”

“No no,” his face flushed with how quickly the response came. “This servant likes it here. I’m perfectly satisfied.” He let the silence only float between them for a moment before he tugged his wrist away, “I'd better be going. Work, and forms, and documents-” He didn’t let any time pass before he closed his door and turned the lock. His mind ran- was his king only checking in on him because he wasn’t completing enough work? The upcoming deadlines that didn’t have their preliminary steps verified? He cursed silently to himself before he heard the quiet shuffling from the other side of the door. 

His king left. 

It shouldn’t have been much of a shock, but he almost expected it to be sooner. He trudged back to his desk and pathetically collapsed into the chair. His voice felt small, “System?”

Yes?

“I know you… can’t change the past, but you can tell me information that…. Might’ve involved the past, right?”

Yes.

The system must’ve been sympathetic to give such short responses during his time of high pain. “That’s great. Is there any chance I have ink in this room? Anything- any color.”

Yes, you have half of a container of black ink in your “dumb shit” drawer. You didn’t like the way the ink ran so you hid it there.

He doubts he’d even be able to remember that in his normal state, but before he could settle on that thought, pain surged his mind again as he outwardly whined. Please- make it stop, it’s too much.

I’m unable to do that.

“Oh- sorry. That um. Wasn’t. To you.” The burst of pain seemed to be ending, or at least merging back into the hell he was going through.

He waited for a response before realizing he wasn’t getting one. It made sense, but he somewhat wanted companionship during a time like this. He felt tragic for that thought coming across his mind- and even more when he supplemented Mobei Jun as the one to help him. His cold arms, hands, everything, the way his deep voice wouldn’t disturb him, the small movements he does without making Shang Qinghua decide even more things.

Fuck, it was just sympathy. He needed to snap out of it. He willed himself to get the shitty ink and make progress, and unfortunately he did just that.

He didn’t know when he had closed his eyes, but he woke up with his back awkwardly aching over his desk. He grabbed his coffee only to realize it was much colder than he remembered it. The sun wasn’t up though, so he didn’t waste too much time. He refreshed himself on the details and groggily returned back to it. He couldn’t disappoint his king, it would all be for nothing if so.

Piercing pain is all that he acknowledged when he woke up one random day. It hurt, it hurt more than he ever could’ve expected. When he could manage more than utter agony, he instinctively called out, “System?”

Good evening, Shang Qinghua.

He somehow forgot sounds existed and he only whined into his pillow. Jesus take the wheel, he would rather be dead than go through all of this. It must’ve been far too long with silence as the System supplemented.

I told you this was a bad idea. (๑•﹏•)

“Shut the…” he couldn’t think anymore, he felt dead. He put proper curtains in front of the windows long ago, never opting for the natural light, but through labored breaths he still felt overstimulated. 

He couldn’t put the effort to listen to the System, he picked out words like “scheduling”, “excessive”, and “king”, but it all muddled into a pile. He interrupted, “Do I have to do anything today?”

Nothing has been attributed to your advising responsibilities.

“Simple,” he hissed.

Nothing.

He felt ready to disintegrate into his bedding, or better yet- throw himself into a frozen river and sink to the bottom. “...actually? Nothing to… catch up on either?”

(ಠ_ಠ)

“System.”

There is nothing required f- [modifying expression] Nothing today. Anything else can wait.

He groggily mumbled, praying the system could understand his incoherence, “Anything request-y that’d help my king?”

There was a long pause.

You’re going too far, Shang Qinghua.

His name felt like nails against a chalkboard considering how many times he signed it lately. “If I’m doing nothing today, I might as well be useful.” Knives sunk further into him, but he’d hopefully sleep it off anyway.

Another long pause. He almost called out before he heard the voice again.

I’ve told you before, this route is not advisable. 

He was told that before? When?

(╯︵╰,)

He couldn’t decipher what it all meant, even without a migraine it might’ve been difficult. “There’s a shipment today, right?” He waited. “System?”

Yes.

“Can you make sure it’s… all good? Like the weather?”

This route is not advisable.

“I’m aware. Just do it.”

Request accepted. Res-

The System said something but any mental processing was cut off by the groan into his pillow. It’d be fine, he could rest knowing that the order would go well and he could-

There was a knock on the door. Was he hallucinating? He must be. 

You are not.

He jumped but nodded, “Thanks.” He almost blinked into sleep before the knock occurred again, more urgent this time. It was probably more work, he either wanted to cry or he already was. He stumbled out of bed, grabbing desperately onto whatever was nearby to keep him standing. It was cold, and it felt good, so he pathetically leaned into it. His eyes remained closed as it was adjacent to a moment of relief for his ever-continuing struggles.

But he knew of his responsibilities- was he going to do work? Nono- the knock on the door. Right. He pulled off of the surface to barely blink at the odd furniture he clung onto. It took him far too long to connect the dots: it was his king, holding him close against his chilled body. His mind distractedly tried to think only to end up with nothing. He stared, mouth slightly open.

It took him another moment to realize that his king was unsheilding an emotion he had never seen in person before- anger, “Why is Qinghua not telling his king what’s wrong?”

He cried, but he would’ve held it back if he had the choice. “‘m sorry. H- hurts.” He put his forehead back onto his king’s chest. Dignity wasn’t even in the back of his mind, he just needed a break. He was running on fumes for so long that he was out of those too.

Mobei Jun seemed to understand well enough and held him close. It was a while before he demanded in a low, deep tone, “Who hurt my Qinghua?”

Shang Qinghua would’ve shook his head, but he settled on, “No one.”

Mobei Jun barely peeled Shang Qinghua off of him to hold his face in his claws and force him to look Mobei Jun in the eyes. Shang Qinghua, still wounded, barely squinted at him. “Tell this king a name.”

Shang Qinghua sniffled. “What will you do?”

“That’s none of Qinghua’s concern. Tell-”

“Shang Qinghua.” Mobei Jun slightly loosened his grip, and Shang Qinghua fully pushed himself back into his king’s chest. 

Mobei Jun put a hand into Shang Qinghua’s hair. The human predicted snapping his neck in half or tearing his head off his neck, but all he received was gentle petting of his head. The claws carefully combed through the matted locks, maneuvering around any knots. Silence floated between the two before Mobei Jun suddenly picked up Shang Qinghua, carrying him bridal style. 

Shang Qinghua lightly protested, but kept his head close to his king’s chest. He didn’t care much for the bobbing movement up and down, but the general temperature change made him open his eyes again. It didn’t take him much time to recognize he was in his king’s private quarters.

It felt like a dream and nightmare all at once. “M- my king?”

“Qinghua is going to rest.”

As a reflex, “No-”

“This king was not open for negotiations.” The harshness shut Shang Qinghua up, but the demon’s face softened just barely, “My Qinghua needs rest.”

When he spoke, it was quiet enough that any sound would’ve risen over him, “Okay.”

Slowly, he was lowered onto his king’s bed, which felt infinitely more comfortable than all the times he passed out at his desk. He felt ready to fall out of consciousness before he felt Mobei Jun pulling away, which evoked a pathetic sound out of him. He caught the cold wrist and put it against his forehead. He needed this, he needed this every goddamn migraine. His king eventually interrupted the silence, but still kept his voice low, “Qinghua’s head hurts.”

He brokenly whispered a confirmation.

“His king… helps?”

“Mhm, stay.”

Any thoughts of doubt were silenced when Mobei Jun climbed into the bed. Of course the bed was big enough for them and probably more, but he was never used to sharing the sheets. On the other hand, Shang Qinghua never desired a large living space. It was more to maintain, and he tried to quench down the thoughts of loneliness every day, but it felt nice to be held by his king, so much so that he didn’t notice his body shivering. 

Mobei Jun tried to move away, but Shang Qinghua held on even more. So instead, the king shuffled around the smaller man tightly wrapped around him, and managed to take off his heavy coat and put it over Shang Qinghua. He typically would’ve never had it in bed in the first place, but that day was the first for a lot of things.

The coat absolutely drowned the human, making him only recognizable through his head poking out. While Mobei Jun adjusted the coat around him, Qinghua slurred a few words before finally going lax. 

This was… not exactly what he was expecting. But he wouldn’t leave now.

It took Shang Qinghua a few days to become functional again, and Mobei Jun stayed by his side for most of it. The human hated feeling so needy, but it was a nice change from the way his weeks had been lately.

Amidst the eating, napping, and basic self-care, he worried about how to tell his king of everything that had occurred. 

Hey, I’m God! That absolutely didn’t explain anything. His king would probably think it was a joke and punish him for wasting his time.

This servant is a God that can- No, too intimidating, potentially hostile. He didn’t want his king to think he was planning to usurp him.

This humble servant has accidentally- Well it was far from an accident.

Through the System, this servant has-

In the midst of his thinking, Mobei Jun entered the room. Shang Qinghua smiled at him, “My king! This servant is feeling much better, and he thanks you for all of your assistance.”

Mobei Jun stared at him before making his way over and sitting on the edge of the bed. He remained silent, so the human supplemented, “Um- about what was happening. This lowly servant was just getting some headaches. Some pollen must’ve remained in my system somehow- but I’m not entirely sure how it got there in the first place, maybe it was a morning walk one day! I’m sure I told you the time I-” 

His king held a hand up, and the rambler silenced himself. His heart pounded until Mobei Jun spoke. “This king… is aware.”

Qinghua rolled for persuasion, “About the pollen?”

“Of other things occurring. Things Qinghua has enjoyed.” His king looked at him without any judgment. “This king does not mind how you obtain things, that's never been of my interest."

“Oh,” was all Shang Qinghua could provide. The racing in his mind seemed to calm down immensely. 

“But this king does not care for how his-” He stopped himself and looked away. “Qinghua has been neglecting his personal duties.” His eyes floated back to the smaller man, “His work is satisfactory, and even above that. But Qinghua cannot be doing this to himself.”

Shang Qinghua felt a heavy weight in his chest. “Of course, my king.”

Mobei Jun nodded once. “Qinghua will pause being my advisor.”

“What?! But my king-”

“This king has observed Qinghua’s patterns. More has been going well, and Qinghua has been getting worse.”

Qinghua squirmed and pathetically pleaded, “I’ll control it better. I won’t do it as much. I’ll figure out a routine and limits-”

The demon sharpened his voice, “Qinghua will not be doing it at all.” 

Qinghua straightened his back. “Yes, my king.”

Mobei Jun apprehensively continued, “Qinghua does not deserve pain. Nothing should be deemed worth more, not even items related to your duties.”

The human let out a slow breath but nodded. “Yes, my king.”

“And you must inform me when this illness occurs. I will not tolerate dismissal of your suffering.” Shang Qinghua played with the edge of the blanket. Mobei Jun reinforced, “Is that understood?”

“Well uh…” He hesitantly spoke with his hand, moving it miscellaneously into the air, “It’s not an illness.”

Mobei Jun blinked. “It affected you like one.”

“I know! But it’s…” He struggled for the words, but thankfully it wasn’t because of a migraine interrupting him. “Like tripping on your ankle. It hurts for a while, but then you recover. This servant just has a low pain tolerance.”

“Qinghua was often tired and not eating well.”

Well shit, was this a conversation or an open book Mobei Jun was reading?? Shang Qinghua tried to defend himself, “Sometimes the pain hurt too much for me to eat. I would eat when it was better though!”

“And the exhaustion?” 

“I wasn’t that tired,” he weakly tried. However, a passively hardened glare made him continue, “I was a little tired. I-” He rubbed his head, memories of his headaches somehow giving him a phantom pain, “It was just catching up to me. Not eating, pain, working. A… bad habit of mine.”

Mobei Jun nodded understandingly. “Regardless, Qinghua will inform me if he obtains any of these symptoms again.”

Shang Qinghua would’ve argued against it, but it was mostly out of instinct rather than rational. He realized that a deep part of him wanted to be cared for, but it felt so damn hard to let it happen, as if it was a confession that he was completely incompetent. He fell on an easy response, “Yes, my king.”

“Mn.”

Shang Qinghua got uncomfortable with the silence rather quickly, “This advisor knows his duties are put to a halt, but…”

“Qinghua may do as he pleases.” He got slightly quieter, “Though this king still wishes to spend time with him.”

“Of course!” Shang Qinghua absolutely said that too loudly, but he bashfully continued, “This servant always enjoys spending time with his king.”

“Then this king will prepare dinner suitable for himself and Qinghua.” 

Dinner?! Damn, his sleep schedule must’ve been fucked. He swallowed any apology or negotiation and simply commented, “That sounds enjoyable. This servant appreciates the generosity of his king.”

Mobei Jun grunted an agreement and left the room, closing the door behind him. Just as Qinghua exhaled, the System popped up.

Told you so. ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

He chuckled and found his lips turning upwards. He oddly missed his buddy, “Yeah yeah. I’m resting now.”

No, about Mobei Jun. 

He raised an eyebrow, “What about him?”

(◕‿-)

He scoffed. “You’re somehow more perverted than me.”

Learned from the best! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

“Of course.” He shuffled out of bed, figuring he could at least freshen up before eating.

So when are you going to fuck him.

“SYSTEM!!”

At that moment, the handheld sat around Shang Qinghua's neck as a pendant on a necklace. The flat green slab was shaped as a circle with a small divot, similar to a "worry stone" where his thumb could rest in the center. However, Qinghua was no stranger to his creation; the edges of the gemstone were lighter vibrations to the dildo, and the inside ramped up in intensity quite quickly.

He traced the very outer rim of the circle with a glance at his king. It was a very innocent action. Qinghua was known as one to fidget, so it wasn't unlike him to absentmindedly slip his hands onto a nearby object while attending a Demon Court's regular meeting. The advisor had already taken some basic notes, he possessed quite the distraction within his pants, and he knew his king had that pretty jade dildo happily sitting inside him.

He carefully stroked the outside of the stone, one finger then two, back and forth in a rhythm. He stared at his king- externally, he was absolutely paying attention; internally, he only fantasized about his king snapping. He hoped for an awkward shift in his king's seat, a rougher exhale- but he didn't see any signs of arousal.

Fair enough, his king might not have even felt it yet. He carefully waited a minute before gliding his hand closer to the inside of the surface. He wasn't quite within the divot of the pendant, but he was closer to the edges of it, circling it like he was bound to fall in from the collapse of gravity.

A voice droned on in the background, but Qinghua knew it wasn't aimed at him. Either way, all that was on his mind was that his king wasn't reacting.

He hid a pout, but he couldn't help but fear that his toy drained so quickly somehow (even though Mobei Jun helped him charge them that morning). With a disappointed huff, he flicked the inside of the divot, carelessly noticing no change from his king.

Well, damn, it was fun while it lasted in his mind. He redirected his eyes and ears to the person speaking and scribbled down a few notes, though still fidgeting around with the gemstone where he cared to. It was a nice, smooth texture, the pads of his fingers delicately glided over the perfectly even surface, not giving much discrimination between the outside edges and the inner divot's center. It was a simple pattern of in and out, around and around, just keeping his mind busy from the monotonous meeting.

It wasn't too long before Mobei Jun spoke. He sounded just a little annoyed- While Qinghua was close enough to him to pick out the base emotion, he couldn't quite tell if it was boredom from the meeting or the lack of sexual action from his human. Regardless, his tone held a faint sharpness similar to the feeling of teeth grazing a collarbone and threatening puncture, "What would Qinghua suggest?"

Usually questions weren't so directly offered to him, but he was his king's advisor so he didn't comment on it. He paused the fidgeting motion and stuck his thumb into the groove. He quickly supplemented, "Well, a trade agreement between the two sections sounds ideal. This should be noted as an internal disagreement that encourages contractual reinforcement, rather than disciplinary action on the court's end. I believe this should be dismissed unless further development warrants an arrest, my king."

Mobei Jun nodded. "This king has come to the same conclusion." Qinghua could've sworn the deep voice deviated in the middle of the sentence, but he brushed it off as his crude mind making things up. The demon continued while Qinghua dabbled his fingers in and out of the pendant, "Case dismissed." He huffed, fed up with such minor conflicts, "Court is dismissed for the day. It will return as Qinghua states."

The advisor quickly tossed a confused glance but redirected his gaze to his papers. It's not like he minded ending the meeting early anyway. He pressed in the divot as he searched for the date and consequently read it aloud.

A few others in the room also seemed unsure of the meeting's abrupt end, but they weren't ones to question the king. Qinghua made himself look busy as he watched everyone leave, but he eventually made his way over to Mobei Jun. He barely opened his mouth before the demon flipped their positions and pinned him on the throne. Shang Qinghua squeaked, "M- my king! What is this for?"

Mobei Jun growled and tightly held onto the small man's wrists, likely leaving bruises for the next day. "Qinghua should not pretend to be naïve."

His king harshly shoved him against the back of the seat he was already pushed against, then let his hands leave the small man, just for them to take off his own robe. While his advisor almost impulsively mirrored the action, he couldn't help but pause for a second. Just after a few ruffles of fabric, he couldn't help but curiously grab the pendant, not even considering the effects of his hand placement.

Mobei Jun shot him a death glare, and Shang Qinghua immediately let go, "My king, you-"

"Quiet," Mobei Jun smashed their lips together in an ugly fashion, teeth colliding when Qinghua didn't open his mouth in sync. He let his king's tongue dive far inside him, only managing a small whine as the demon devoured him.

When Qinghua noticed the quick hands take apart his robe, he tried to help, but he only got smacked out of the way as his king decided to rip the outfit in half. Any petty thoughts were quickly interrupted as he looked to see Mobei Jun's hard, leaking penis already being lined up into his hole. Qinghua yelped, "I'm not prepped yet!"

Mobei Jun scowled but understood the dilemma well. He raised his hips while forcing Qinghua's head lower down, not bothering to wait for his human's recognition before opening the small one's mouth to slide his cock in. He wasn't gentle nor patient; he used the brunette's locks like a handle to insert himself deep in the human's throat.

Shang Qinghua pathetically gagged as tears formed in his eyes- all he could smell was Mobei Jun, all he could feel was his king's dick burning the back of his throat- but he was left with little time to process it all as his king maneuvered the human to the base of the cock without any room to move. Mercifully, after a moment, his king pulled him off, but only to instruct, "Prepare yourself," before pushing his advisor's head back down on his member.

Qinghua handled the presence in his mouth slightly better, but not significantly so, as he also focused his attention on the brief instructions. Thank goodness he wrote it into PIDW that men produced a natural lube- he shoved two fingers in. He gagged on Mobei Jun's dick in the process, but the fingers slipped in easily enough. In and out, a separation of digits, a pleasured whine soon interrupted with Mobei Jun ramming himself into the human's throat once more.

While Shang Qinghua was stretched from the previous time they had sex, it didn't feel like enough to be suddenly demolished. He would've shivered in anticipation if he had the room to move, but he unfortunately remained pinned between the throne, his king's hand, and the cock he sucked at.

He focused on his fingers and stretched himself out to handle another. Simultaneously, Mobei Jun threw Qinghua's head back, who immediately sputtered and coughed from the previously unrelenting abuse of his throat. He didn't have much time before Mobei Jun tossed Qinghua's fingering hand to the side, instead lining himself up.

Shang Qinghua barely rasped, his voice scratchy, "My king-" His king's dick slammed into him, causing only a scream to break through his plea. Instinctively, he grabbed his necklace- he grabbed the jade pendant just to tug onto something in the meantime.

Mobei Jun roughly breathed onto Shang Qinghua, a cold air following the exhale. He paused his movements, but the two panted.

Shang Qinghua realized after far too long that he was still holding onto the pendant. He hesitantly placed it down, to which he saw Mobei Jun quickly look at him. The advisor dared to ask, "Was the jade working… the entire meeting?"

It felt obvious in hindsight and even more so when his king deadpanned, "My Qinghua timed it perfectly."

"I timed it for when I got a little bored!" He cringed, "Sorry," before laughing a bit at their position, "Well, not so much now."

Shang Qinghua dared to trace the pendant, obsessively watching how Mobei Jun tracked the movement, his eyes darting from the slight touch before narrowing at him, "This king should have ruined his advisor during court." He made a shallow, but firm thrust, "Made Qinghua scream for his king in front of them."

Fuck, as if that wasn't one of his routine fantasies. He barely managed to speak through the moans, "Is that why my king is fucking me here? Would he want them to see how much my king owns his advisor?"

Mobei Jun grunted a confirmation and shoved himself in at a rougher angle, but something didn't quite satisfy the human. When he got another moment to speak, he smirked, "Or did my king want them to see how needy I make you? How that dick belongs to- oh-" He couldn't manage to stumble across his words as his demon desperately thrusted into him.

He tightly grabbed Qinghua's hips, handling them to further use his human at the rough pace. He breathily murmured, "Allow this king to pleasure you. Please allow him that."

Qinghua lost mental control, only keeping a tight grip on his pendant, clutching like a lifeline. He moaned and writhed, unable to request any change in pace.

Mobei Jun chanted, "Qinghua's, Qinghua's, all Qinghua's," but Qinghua might've came at the first mention.

The streaks were consistent, unlike the uneven jerk of his hips from overstimulation and naturally attempting to assist his king. He babbled regardless, "Mine- you'll be mine! M- my king shall be my property!"

His cheeks burned, he felt scandalous for the words; as if he'd perhaps be banished at any moment, but he laid there, screaming from another round of rough assault on his prostate while resting on the king's throne for support. He barely gained control to stutter out, "My king-"

"Yes, Qinghua?" He pounded deeply into his human, eyes drifting down to the cum as he groaned.

"Please- please finish inside. Show everyone how I make my king feel. S- show them how I control you."

Mobei Jun obeyed, but it still took him a few thrusts to cum, and a handful more to ride out the high. Shang Qinghua took it through tears, praising Mobei Jun as often as he could. Slowly, the two came to a stop, frozen in their places, panting, and finding simple comfort to remain in their positions.

Mobei Jun spoke first, an unusual pattern for them, "Qinghua… owns this king?"

Any orgasmic bliss was interrupted; the human felt like a fucking idiot. "Ah, nono, sorry, my king. This advisor was… uh- sidetracked? Not thinking correctly! Yes, this one was just rambling-"

Mobei Jun left a cold kiss on the side of his neck, immediately making his advisor silent. He whispered to the skin, "This king never said he disliked it."

Oh.

Oh, fuck.

This was the best and worst time to get hard again.

Mobei Jun noticed the twitch from Qinghua's dick. He gently grabbed it, earning a whine from his human. "Could my Qinghua… say it again?"

Shang Qinghua nodded, but he imagined himself tiptoing around a trap. "I…" He roughly swallowed, the rest came out quieter, "Own my king." He was encouraged by a purposeful tug to his dick and an accidental shift from Mobei Jun's hips.

"Again."

"I- I own my king, every part of him." He wasn't new to this speech- hell, he wrote too much erotica to claim that. Yet when he spoke the words to Mobei Jun, it felt so much more real. He could see how Mobei Jun shifted from his words, how those icy eyes glared at Qinghua, and even feel the angry huffs of air at the teasing. Every movement from the human had an effect, and it even showed through the small groan he got when he clung onto the demon's dick. He drank in the sight like an alcoholic. "My king behaves so well for me, doesn't he?"

Mobei Jun visibly fell apart, a more earnest thrust delivered as well. His long black hair became generally more disheveled, sweat making it cling to his face.

The human pushed a strand back. "Answer me," he gently requested.

It might've been greedy to ask for so much, but his king complied, "Yes, my Qinghua."

"Good." The simple acknowledgement earned him another deep thrust. A devious thought came to his mind. "Stop."

Mobei Jun halted immediately, midway through a push. If Qinghua was kinder, he would've allowed his demon to bury himself deep inside him, but instead, the small man gave him a chaste kiss, "Change our position. I'll ride you."

Mobei Jun manhandled his human easily, putting himself in the bottom position, sitting up on his throne as he typically did.

Qinghua marveled at the sight before awarding his king (and partially himself) with a gentle bounce. He let out a gentle moan and spoke under his breath, "Fuck, my good boy." He gently sat there, admiring his demon as he touched his jade pendant.

Mobei Jun grinded upwards into the warm entrance, but didn't maneuver Qinghua to make more progress.

Shang Qinghua carefully observed him, "Does my king like this? When your advisor decides exactly how much pleasure you receive?"

Mobei Jun nodded with lustful eyes.

Qinghua indulged himself, unsure of how far this power would let him go, "Verbally."

The demon noticed the shift and paused before delicately answering, "Yes, my Qinghua."

"What does my king like more," He dipped his fingers into the pendant. His heart fluttered in tune to how Mobei Jun gently tried to get friction, "This advisor controlling how much pleasure is received-" He quickly bounced on the dick two times, before settling at the base once more, a bothered groan reached his ears. "Or where it is?"

Mobei Jun didn't take any time to answer, "Both."

Qinghua tsked. He leaned in to kiss his king's neck, "My king shouldn't be so greedy." He lapped at a barely visible vein, tracing it up to the edge of his jawline. Qinghua felt the irony sink into him; he was so damn greedy with Mobei Jun. The human needed to hear the desperation in that deepened voice, and even more so- Qinghua needed to be what incited it. He felt intoxicated, "Answer properly."

Mobei Jun grabbed Qinghua's hips, but the advisor knew well by now and caught his wrists. It wasn't a battle of strength nor lust, the king paused at the slightest restriction. He let his wrists be placed on the throne.

Shang Qinghua only felt more desperate to ride on the cock inside him, but he managed to stay composed, "Keep those hips still or I'll get off of you. Answer my original question."

Mobei Jun quietly groaned and looked away. The answer came sooner than the brunette expected. "Controlling how much."

Shang Qinghua was no sadist- he gently rolled himself on Mobei Jun's hips as a reward for both of them. He allowed himself to sensually move back and forth, taking his time to see his king unravel. "Hm, I'll have to play around with that idea sometime. But for now, I'll just play with you." He gave Mobei Jun a few well-deserved bounces, Qinghua moaned towards the ceiling. Pleasure surged through him, he didn't know how much he should control himself. He slowed down slightly, noting every detail of the scene for his long-term memories- how Mobei Jun's eyebrows remained tense, but his eyes were much gentler. Sweat glistened off his skin. Oh, how the human wished he could worship the sight all day. He leaned in, deeply inhaling the scent of his king. He allowed himself to nibble on Mobei Jun's earlobe. He knew his king could handle more, but he still grazed his teeth gently, "My king doesn't mind being my toy, right?"

Mobei Jun shook his head, but not enough to move away from the touch. "No, my Qinghua. Please indulge."

Qinghua hummed in sync to a shift, "Good." He pulled back and rode Mobei Jun more properly, partially holding onto his abdomen for support. Mobei Jun seemed remarkably more well-behaved, he kept his hands to himself, perhaps entranced by Qinghua's tightened thighs, the muscles showcasing themselves in a way they rarely did. The human rose up and down, a wet sound following suit. He groaned, he hoped the throne was stained, that Mobei Jun could see it and lick at the velvet. He desperately needed his king to circle his tongue around his hole next, he felt a phantom touch run through him, his king's words echoed to him, Please indulge yourself with me. He groaned, bouncing upwards then grinding himself down harder, "Only my good king could tell me that."

He got into a comfortable rhythm and shifted himself to only need one hand for the support. He only clutched at the necklace, and Mobei Jun's head fell backward with a loud groan. Qinghua purred, "Oh, my king is just like a pretty doll, I can do whatever I'd like to you." He spoke under his breath, far too depraved and corrupted for the demon beneath him, he rubbed his thumb deeply into the jade divot. "Perhaps this advisor should dress his king in some lace. A nice white pair, only worn and used for me," the last part was firmer. His eyes squeezed shut as he whined at a quick movement, "Make my king wear that all day underneath his robes. I hope you'd leak out of them and sit in agony, while your loyal advisor knew exactly what was on your mind." It followed a similar beat to their day in court, he smiled like a cheshire cat, "And what would my king be thinking about?"

Mobei Jun was too strained, he wasn't used to holding himself back from fucking his Qinghua. His hips remained perfectly still, a miracle he had so much discipline, "Y- you. My Qinghua."

Shang Qinghua giggled. "My perfect king takes his advisor so well~"

Mobei Jun's final bit of patience snapped, he rutted into his human, grabbing onto the readily available hips to assist in his speed. Qinghua toppled but allowed his king to utilize his hole. The demon moaned a mantra while he spilled into his human, giving a few more solid thrusts in between, "My Qinghua, my Qinghua-"

Shang Qinghua struggled with the change, but as soon as he felt his king's speed dipping, he pushed himself back up to harshly continue. He fingered the divot of the jade pendant to assist him and watched Mobei Jun shake beneath him, his hungry eyes darkened, "Oh, I don't know if that name is fitting anymore. Perhaps this advisor needs a new name from you." He grinded himself deeper, uncaring for Mobei Jun's needed recovery. He watched Mobei Jun's cock slide into him, disappearing to form a slight bulge. It was his bulge now, unrecognizable to its original owner. He gave Mobei Jun a quick kiss, "How about master?"

Mobei Jun's voice broke, a haze surrounding him. "Please, Master-"

Shang Qinghua fucked himself harder. "Y- yes, my king?"

"Please pleasure yourself. Do not-" He gasped, "Do not stop."

The human chuckled, but his movements were frantic. "You think you get to command me? That's cute." His back arced from a deeper movement, he cursed to himself. He needed it- he needed this release, "Hands above your head, thrust into your master. Make me-" He was cut off by ravenous grinding into him, he loudly moaned, "J- just like that, my king."

It wasn't long until Mobei Jun completely stalled, only pushing himself back into his throne. He pleaded, "Master, I-"

Qinghua didn't think, he boldly slapped his king.

Maybe in the heat of the moment, he thought of how demons expressed their affections, but he paused, his mid-riding motion into an opportunity to sit on the cock. He was so desperate to ride his king, his entrace throbbing for abuse, but he forgot it was probably Mobei Jun's first time taking the submissive role. He carefully tested the waters, "Why did you stop?"

Mobei Jun seemed smaller, "Pain."

They had tested Qinghua's boundaries of pain before. And his king hadn't safeworded. He cupped the demon's face, "Unmanageable?"

Mobei Jun seemed like he was caught red-handed, "…No." He never quite understood overstimulation; he had never experienced it so intensely before.

Qinghua most likely should've stopped, but logic told him that his king was at the very least resilient, but also authoritative and strong enough to toss the small human off of him if he ever needed a true break. The advisor was too tormented to pause, his voice was riddled with clinging desperation, "I'm close- very fucking close. So just follow my instructions for just a bit longer. Okay?"

Mobei Jun nodded, perhaps the small break was sufficient for him. "Yes, master." As soon as Qinghua lifted himself off of Mobei Jun, his king thrusted up. The human was cut off with a buzzing moan, wanting to collapse right there.

Qinghua mentally ran back to his previous spot, but his words were uneven, randomly scattered between moans and pants, "You're just a dick for me to cum on, a fun plaything-" He groped his jade pendant, and the thrusts correspondingly became rougher. He barely commanded, "Use your hands."

One hand went to his leaking dick, jerking him off in pace to the bounces, while the other grabbed at the pendant to drag the human down towards Mobei Jun. Qinghua let himself fall apart, just clutching tightly at the gemstone as he draped himself across his king's chest. Mobei Jun handled the pleasurable movements. Hips thrusted into his entrance, one hand supported his back to encourage the repetitive motion, and the other relentlessly fisted the human's dick. Shang Qinghua cried out, "Oh, good boy- good, good, good, good, my-" He came without a further warning, screaming into Mobei Jun's skin before he latched down onto his king's neck. He needed to make the man bleed, to make him his, to make everyone identify the taller man as his property- fuck, his good boy. Such a good sex toy, allowing him to ride out his orgasm-

He barely noticed the haze between Mobei Jun pleasuring him to holding him delicately. Qinghua let out an afterwave moan, "My king."

"My… master?"

Qinghua furrowed his brow and shook his head to nuzzle Mobei Jun. "That's just a sex thing. I don't wanna… be weird. About us- or my relationship to you. Sorry, this one should've talked to his king outside of sex about it-"

He was silenced with a kiss to his lips, gentle and caring. "Qinghua," Mobei Jun slowly began, "This one didn't mind."

"Right, yeah." He swallowed. "Thanks."

Mobei Jun hummed, "Don't worry as much. My Qinghua did wonderful."

"Nono- you did wonderful." The emotional aftercare should've been centered on his king, but he was so mentally fuzzy on how to proceed, "I was more of the dom this time. So you did good."

But as usual, Mobei Jun took apart his ruminations with just a few words, "As if we cannot both perform well?"

Qinghua felt hesitant, but surrendered, "Fair enough."

Next, his breathing grew uneven. The air felt like it dropped a few degrees as he carefully inhaled. It was unlikely, but perhaps he was overexerting himself. Granted, he absolutely did work a lot, but it seemed random for him to feel like he was gasping and fighting back the urge to slam his lips into- Nono, he didn't want to kiss Mobei Jun. Well, he was quite a crude man; of course he wanted that, but it was too overwhelming to act out.

He'd pull Mobei Jun down to his level and connect them so simply. His warm tongue would swipe his king's bottom lip. Oh, how he could feign innocence, "I'm not feeling so well today. Could my king assist his servant?"

Subconsciously (or perhaps consciously), it could've been a qi deviation. That's why he suddenly needed- nono, wanted to ask Mobei Jun to kiss him; he simply wanted the transfusion from a strong demon. Skin contact made it easier, that's all.

He'd drink down Mobei Jun's darkly colored saliva like it was a sacred medicine. "Thank you, my king. How could I repay you? I know I don't have the riches you possess…"

Then, he felt uncomfortable. Warm, boiling, sweating, and if he were any more brash, then he would've grabbed Mobei Jun and forced the ice king to cool him down. He pulled at the edges of his robe, babysitting his movements. He adjusted the sides of his pants one, two, three times before he realized it was the best he was going to feel. He must've grabbed the wrong size that morning. Regardless, he went quiet. The silence eased the invisible tension suddenly in the air.

Finally, a pestly thought swarmed at him. Specifically, the idea that Mobei Jun was very attractive. Very fucking attractive. As they walked, he didn't mind staring, groping the man with his eyes. Each feature possessed was a bright light to Qinghua's mothly self;

That sleek, long hair would drape over the human while they-

The gorgeous, pale skin could be better revealed once Qinghua pulled back that thick coat and left a precious mark-

His muscles/tits-

Shang Qinghua was a weak man, but he gathered the strength to drag his eyes away.

It was after one too many breathy pants that his king stopped walking. The human stopped too, but didn't look in the other man's direction. Mobei Jun spoke after a minute, "Qinghua."

Fuck, tell him he's been good, claim him for all to see, give him a collar and drag him around- all exactly with that firm tone. Mobei Jun interrupted his thoughts and more firmly established, "Qinghua." His heart pounded. "Speak when you're spoken to."

Yes, Sir. "Y- yes, my king," his voice was shakier than he anticipated. He forgot to make his response a question, too obsessed with not making a fool out of himself. He needed Mobei Jun- wait, he didn't mean it like that. He needed this job, this role, and his king's company was simply a welcome addition.

He dared to look over at his king, but it only made him crumble. The demon looked him up and down, his eyes narrowed and brow tense with concern. "Explain."

His breath hitched. "Nothing to explain."

"So a fraud and a liar now, hm?" Mobei Jun pushed Qinghua's back to a tree and slotted a thigh between his human's legs. He held Qinghua against the wall as he grinded down. "Perhaps I need to better train my servant how to-"

A cold hand was placed on his shoulder, but it was far from the cold shower he needed. While the action was surely from a place of camaraderie, he couldn't help but imagine that it pushed him to the ground, on his knees, where he belonged. He didn't recognize himself falling for his king like that, his newfound situation only arose when the impact of the ground hit him.

His mouth salivated when he was closer to his king's crotch, and he fought every fucking urge in his body not to obediently put his hands behind his back and suck on the piece of fabric covering his demon's cock. He purposefully put his hands on his thighs, shutting his legs too. He stared up at Mobei Jun with hazy eyes, but his mouth felt like cotton; he should be gagged, kept as a good pet for his king. He wouldn't mind a rope being tied around his wrists or throat, then being simply tugged along wherever needed.

Mobei Jun expressed considerate worry, an odd look on him. His voice varied, but he held Qinghua's face with a piercing claw, "Qinghua, it's dire that you explain this. Do you need medical assistance?"

He almost drove himself straight into Mobei Jun's dick, but he scrambled away. "N- no! No, I don't! I'll be fine. It'll-" He was overstimulated within his clothes; he put a hand over his mouth, and while hiding his dusted pink cheeks, the smallest whine came out. The pollen must've been amplifying his need, he hid his face and urged his king through clenched teeth, "It'll pass, m- my king. Just- please leave me. Please."

"No. You don't know better than this king. Not this time."

Qinghua writhed as if flames were burning his veins from start to end; he opened his legs again just to shut them. Mobei Jun kicked his legs open and put his boot over the human's bulge. He let out an agonized groan into his hand, feeling a phantom pleasure spread through him as he unmuted himself to plead, "Leave, you need to leave."

Mobei Jun seemed to be on the same page- but within a different book. He knelt down. "I won't allow this. I need to examine the wound." There was another sentence, half-imagined by Qinghua and partially unspoken by Mobei Jun: He would have his way whether or not the human fought back.

At another beat of reluctance, Mobei Jun opened Shang Qinghua's legs, and the man bucked emptily. He shook, "Fuck, please- Don't, my king-"

He couldn't help that he contradicted himself, his self-preservation and horniness only escalated when he received Mobei Jun's strong touch. (He knew he was weaker, he was obsessed with how he was weaker.) The rapid claws began with his outer robe and Qinghua quickly grabbed both of Mobei Jun's wrists. He pleaded with his eyes, but before a verbal protest could be given, Qinghua was strongly batted away with a glare. Mobei Jun growled, "Stay. Still."

He obeyed for a moment, but only because of the unrelenting fog in his mind. Before Mobei Jun could finish undressing him, he hovered a hand over the most desperate part of himself, not daring to actually give himself the friction. He spoke with more sincerity, "Don't." A second passed, but it was an eternity to be trapped under the ice king. He was quieter, "Please."

Mobei Jun's eyes softened as he paused. He thought carefully, but the way he stared at Qinghua only made the human squirm. Mobei Jun mimicked Qinghua's cadence, "This king would not violate your trust. He only wants to assist his Qinghua."

Qinghua must've looked pathetic, hiding himself while barely tearing up, "You can't."

"If you know the remedy, I'll have it made at once, you don't-"

"You can't!" He felt actual tears hit him now, and he didn't mind shedding them. In truth, very few of them were emotional; most related to his desperate need not being met and all of the restraint to not let Mobei Jun continue. "P- please-" He recognized the nature of the lustful saying only after it spilled off his lips. Another fantasy flashed into his eyes.

Mobei Jun would tilt his head. "Please, what?" Mobei Jun silenced any coherent response with a grope to his clothed dick. "Beg for what you want. This king will service you."

Qinghua bit into the sleeve of his outer robe and moaned into it. He didn't want to fight against Mobei Jun's urgent movements; if anything, he probably couldn't anymore. He didn't bother to look, but he felt his lower half become exposed to the air- or at least everything except the thin garment over his cock. Mobei Jun must've been a gentleman to leave that, a blessing and a curse.

Regardless, the king examined his skin, and Qinghua leaned into everything he was given. There was prodding to his ribs, circles ran over the skin as the demon methodically trailed across his abdomen. Shang Qinghua let out a reserved moan at one slightly lower touch in particular. Mobei Jun paused, "Did that hurt?"

"No, sir."

Mobei Jun huffed. "Your front or your back?"

"Both, either one you want. J- just please-" touch me, claim what's yours. Use my body however you please.

Mobei Jun decided he would have better luck checking the human's back, especially considering how the small one bucked forward into many of the touches. The demon quickly flipped Qinghua over, but carefully avoided injuring his human any further.

And so, those graceful touches returned upon Qinghua once more. At first, they were easy to mentally avoid; he could instead stare at his surroundings and take in the details. But after Mobei Jun grabbed his hips (probably to make the human stay still), he couldn't help but grind into the ground the best he could. He was screwed, or maybe he only hoped he was. He was probably going to lose his job over this, but he couldn't hold himself back any longer.

Every shaky inhale led to another gasp of air; it only took Mobei Jun slightly lifting his underwear, barely peaking at the skin, for Qinghua to break, "Please, my king. Please resolve it."

The demon sounded frustrated, but not in the same way, "I am unaware of how to. Instruct me."

Shang Qinghua ground his hips into the ground again. He couldn't show Mobei Jun what he meant-

He finished demonstrating to Mobei Jun how to more safely choke a human's throat. The taller man checked, "And Qinghua is sure he wants this? Even if he fights back?"

Shang Qinghua rolled his eyes. He wasn't made of glass, "Yes, we've covered this a million times, I-"

He was cut off by the strong claw wrapping around his throat. "My servant will say 'Yes, Sir' and nothing more, do you understand?" He nodded, dizzy as he instinctually grabbed his king's wrist. Mobei Jun scowled, a look that sent him a rush of blood, "You agree, yet do not follow your instructions."

Qinghua barely choked out, "Y- yes, sir."

Shang Qinghua felt Mobei Jun flip him again. Qinghua couldn't fucking take it anymore- light flashed in front of his eyes, and he pounced, sitting on Mobei Jun's lap in an instant. He rasped, "You need to tell me to stop. You can't let me do this."

Mobei Jun seemed amazed, curious even, "Why would I tell you to stop? Your king only wants to help you."

Qinghua grinded onto Mobei Jun- he was messy and uncoordinated, frantic and weak. Mobei Jun held onto his hips for support; Qinghua grabbed Mobei Jun's strong shoulders. He allowed himself more pressure, a few more pushes before he shuddered, "How long d- ah~ did you know?"

He grinded down again, shoving himself as far down onto Mobei Jun's pants as he possibly could. Mobei Jun moved upwards, but not out of his own need. "Not long ago."

"How long-" He shifted just right, repeating the exact circular motion with a loud moan. "When did you find out?"

"Only now, when you came closer." Mobei Jun let out a small groan, "You were attractive, but you always are. This king assumed it was his imagination." He whispered a bit more breathlessly, "To look like that and not beg."

Qinghua's hips stuttered, "I'll beg for you now. I- I'll fuck myself on you- I'd get on my knees, just tell me. T- tell-" He tightly closed his eyes, leaned into Mobei Jun's chest, and urgently grinded down. He felt like a toy with a spring straining his insides; the coil inside him shifted, and he only moved faster. "Fuck, tell me what position, I'll- I'll-"

Mobei Jun shushed him, "We have time. Don't worry, my Qinghua. I'll enjoy you in many ways."

Shang Qinghua was pushed down on the demon's crotch just a few more times before he released into his underwear. He gasped and rode out the high best he could, yelling miscellaneous curses and begs along the way. His skin buzzed as he kept moving, unable to stop himself from the high he got.

Mobei Jun could only hold his human close, whispering how perfect his Qinghua was, how he deserved this pleasure, but he eventually frowned. The small one wasn't pausing. He lifted Qinghua, who whined and bucked into him, "P- please, please my king. Sir, please allow me more, just one more. Please-"

While the sex pollen was typically released after an orgasm, they both failed to acknowledge that they were fucking in the sex pollen, and that every breath surrendered from Shang Qinghua only increased his sensitivity.

Mobei Jun bit into his neck, silencing the pleas in exchange for a high-pitched sound of agony. "Patience. You can't stay here."

"No- I can. I'll-" He pushed himself back onto Mobei Jun, grinding aimlessly.

However, he didn't get far before Mobei Jun shoved more firmly, an easy battle, especially with how Qinghua had let himself get toppled. "We'll go to my bedroom."

"Sir-"

He firmly stated, "Qinghua." It was too quick for him to realize it might have been too far; tears appeared in his human's eyes. Shang Qinghua messily wiped them, but Mobei Jun feared the damage was already done. "Qinghua…"

The human shook his head. "I'm fine." His breath hitched through a sob, he clung onto Mobei Jun, "I'm- it hurts. Please fuck me. It can be in your bedroom, I don't care, j- just please." Qinghua held clear restraint not to grind down once more.