#small essay

This is not a monstrous nightmare. This is a winged red lizard. This creature is cumbersome and unintelligent. It holds none of the terrifying grace and agility of a true monstrous nightmare. This bulky lizard could not run and climb and jump across an arena. It could not think about anything more than a snail. Its tail is stiff and rigid, incapable of expressing the animals intrigue or joy. Its talons are that of any generic dragon, instead of the iconic large hooks of a nightmare. Its stance is stuck low to the ground instead of the wide ranges of posture a true nightmare could take on. It angers me.

This is how a true monstrous nightmare is. Its body is large, but light. It has fluid movements and eyes that are not dead with cgi. It is agile and strong, capable of running and leaping and scaring the shit out of anyone. Its eyes are forward facing, indicating its stance at the top of its food chain. You can see the cogs turning in this animals head. Its slightly askew proportions make it expressive and interesting to watch. It is active and quick and intelligent. This animal knows and is aware of what is going on. This animal is terrifying.

Call me negative and unappreciative or whatever you want, but this:

Will always pale in comparison to this:

Trust does not fail under a single overwhelming load. It fails through the slow exhaustion of its fatigue life. Every material possesses a finite number of cycles it can withstand before microscopic dislocations coalesce into rupture. A bridge girder stressed repeatedly well below its ultimate strength will one day fracture without drama. The final truck is rarely heavier than the thousands that crossed before it. The difference is that the metal has already surrendered its remaining life. Human trust follows the same invisible accounting. The small inconsistencies, the postponed apologies, the careless handling of confidences do not break the bond in isolation. They steadily consume its endurance until the structure can no longer tolerate even ordinary weight.

Stress concentration reveals the terrifying leverage of minor flaws. A surface imperfection no deeper than a scratch can multiply local forces by factors of three or ten. The bulk of the material remains untroubled while the flaw bears catastrophic intensity. In relationships these concentrators form wherever attention slips or respect is applied unevenly: a repeated dismissal of a fear, a confidence shared without permission, an emotional absence papered over with routine. The surrounding love may feel intact, yet at that precise point the forces have already escalated beyond what the material was designed to bear. The damage accelerates not because the injury is large, but because the geometry of the flaw turns ordinary stress into something lethal.

Fracture toughness determines why identical injuries destroy some bonds and leave others scarred but functional. Ductile materials absorb energy through plastic deformation, blunting the crack tip and redistributing strain. Brittle ones release suddenly once a critical length is reached. Trust varies in the same way. Some relationships possess an innate microstructure of forgiveness and recalibration that allows them to deform without shattering. Others, built on rigid ideals of perfection, propagate the smallest fissure into total separation. The governing variable is not the depth of initial love but the hidden capacity to blunt and redirect the advancing fracture.

Even the strongest designs incorporate mechanisms that arrest propagating cracks. Layers that force a fracture to change direction, fibers that bridge gaps, joints engineered to yield in controlled ways rather than catastrophically. In living trust these arresters emerge as precise patterns of repair: the ability to name damage without triggering defense, the practiced return to shared ground after rupture, the deliberate reinforcement of continuity where it has been severed. Their presence does not prevent injury. It prevents the injury from becoming destiny.

Today 24th of March, we are standing at 50 years of the last Dictatorship in Argentina,pushed by the USA during the cold war. This intervention brought chaos,death and torture to a country that was starting to grow. Kidnapping millions of babies,killing countless families and friends, and burying Argentina and almost killing it.

This is a small essay,with pictures,sources and a few videos, to educate non-Argentines about this very important part of history, to warn you that what happened here could happen to you, and what to look out for. It's written by an Amateur film student,but I did put my heart into it.

Even if you dont read it, please share it.

This is my small act of protest and activism,not letting this be forgotten or twisted. Memoria,verdad y justicia. Que esto no vuelva a pasar nunca mas.

I really would've loved them to focus on it more. they showed it enough to peak my interest, but they could have had more of Jack helping him past it.

on it's own, Ianto's sister's reaction to him liking Jack (and essentially coming out to her) made me cringe, because that's someone who was brought up in the same way as Ianto was (like how siblings have similar speech patterns or manners, because they were taught by the same parents). it immediately tells us that his family aren't exactly comfortable with gay people - though, luckily, she cares about Ianto enough to simply be utterly surprised and not suddenly dislike him. but Johnny (her husband) had the worst reaction immediately after Ianto and his sister talk (I'm not gonna repeat it) but I think it really showed how people in that area were really against the lgbtq+ community, or at least had awful and/or stereotypical opinions. (side note: when she was asking Ianto about he and Jack, he asked her if her daughter should really be hearing this. very heavily implying how wrong he feels he is)

but Ianto, someone brought up in this area, ends up with Jack, and the fact that they're both men hadn't been shown as an issue at any prior point. but suddenly in Children of Earth they present it.

for example, Clem states that Ianto is "queer, I can smell it" (whatever the hell that smells like) (probably fruity) (😂 I'm sorry, sorry), but then Ianto turns around, angry and yells "Oi!".

in the time Torchwood was made I suppose the whole world was a bit more homophobic, but it was not once an issue before then. so you have to presume it's just them trying to flesh out his character (which it successfully does).

which brings me smoothly onto my conclusion. if they were to create this subplot of internalized homophobia, then they probably should have actually made it go somewhere and not just leave me crying on the floor.

👍✨ (tysm for reading this all, if you got this far 😂)

It’s Yang, it’s Yang, of course it’s Yang how could it not be Yang Xiao Long. Yang as a character - and rwby as a whole literally flashbanged my entire humanity in june of 2022.

Lots of people love Yang, how couldn’t you. Maybe you relate with her backstory in relation to Ruby, how she was forced to grow up and play parent for Ruby because both their mom’s fumbled the bag. Maybe you’re someone who’s lost a limb or otherwise disabled and find triumph in how she fights on despite her disability. For me, it’s neither - what gets me going about her is her personality, particularly in early volumes. She’s this larger than life, fun loving person who’s the embodiment of warm fire who brings you in and is your friend. Which is exactly the kind of standard i try to live up to. Another aspect of this side of her i love is the protector aspect she inhabits, she was Ruby’s protector, as a huntress she’s everyone’s protector. I want to be her in every way imaginable.

The “Rule of Cool” in character designs, which is that if something is cool enough it deserves to exist is so very alive to me, and gosh is Yang cool. she’s cocky, her personality and silhouette is so big and massive and imposing. “let’s kiss and make up then you’ll learn” is such a good lyric for her from the song about her “i burn”. These attributes of her and the rule of cool are all things that i identify with myself. I’m also massive and cocky and i think i’m awesome but i am literally Ivern in red flannel. Yang does the whole damn thing, looks the part, saves the day sometimes, has an emotional background and gets bitches all while being so so human.

To continue on with Yang’s cool factor i want to touch on her design as a whole. It’s perfect, that’s just a fact. My favorite part about her is her hair. Big wavy hair that gives her a massive anchor in her design as well as giving her a unique silhouette compared to other characters in the show. Secondly her outfits she wears in different volumes are always the best. Her outfits are practical, and look like they totally belong to a biker girl who beats the shit out of you. Even down to her more finite details, like the purple bandana around her knee which relates to her relationship with Blake.

A tertiary point about yang that’s fundamental in *why* i like her so much is how she is this strong, imposing and daunting character, but she’s still presented as feminine. The way that rwby as a show presents Yang as a whole and tows a line between allowing Yang to be a masculine aligned berserker while not falling on “butch” tropes is so important to me. Yang is almost an entire new breed of femininity, one that i align with a lot.

Yang is so very much a part of me, But so is this fucking asshole.

POWER SWEEEEEEEEP i love Power for so many reasons that are so painfully simple.

Her backstory or storyline isn’t a tragedy like Yang or even Denji. Her backstory is just she was a lonely freak and found a cat. It’s so simple, yet i relate to it in my own way. And it’s so important to me to relate to a character in my own way. Never in my life have i found a character i related to, not once. And power gets me somewhat close to that feeling we all deserve.

Power borrows from the “Rule of Cool” less than yang, but is still great from a design wise on her own. When i first saw her in the intro i figured she was going to be a typical boring shonen-girl-type, but i was immediately proved wrong. Her human form design is so simple but portrays so much about her. The devil horns constantly present in her design are testament to her troublemaker attitude, which are contrasted by the business shirt and tie that she shares with her peers in public safety. **Spoilers for the ending of CSM part 1** When she assumes her devil form upon coming back from getting bang’d she’s a crazy looking monster, similar to kindred (who i also love dearly). This monstrous form she assumes for only a few pages are easily my favorite moment in chainsaw man as a whole. There’s just something right about this asshole getting to be a monster for like 10 min and giving up her life to save her state appointed brother

Power is, for all intensive purpose, a comedic relief character - in a show about horrible miserable topics with a messed up sense of humor, which is another trait i find relatable, i’m also the comedic relief girl.

Thankfully Power isn’t *just* her awful traits that make her hilarious and ridiculous. She’s a dutiful protector, of Meowy and of Denji in later chapters. She’s shown to have deep seeded fears in her character, her submission to makima, her impairing fear of the dark after darkness devil. These additions into her silly persona make her a well rounded, entertaining and fun character.

Ilsa offers freedom's temptation right when the action ramps up, offering an end to the constant fighting and struggle for Ethan Hunt to be believed. Selina says it after the main crisis has passed, ln the cusp of a wave (see what I did there?) of further crises to follow. They both ask the main character to stop on a death-defying, limit pushing quest they've more or less self imposed. They've chosen to accept these missions, and for the briefest moment they contemplate saying yes. Ultimately they don't, and this too is framed as the right decision.

What's also interesting is that both Ilsa and Selina are in some way trapped or forced into the situations they're in, but the heroes have chosen their predicaments, but likely feel a little trapped by its burdens. Aside from just sexual/romantic temptation, both Ilsa and Selina offer a chance to be free of this life and happy. And that chance is not taken for noble/moral/philosophical reasons.

Anyway! Here's my 'essay' on

Why I believe Charlie 'Nuwanda' Dalton is a trans lesbian*

*a small note: I do use he/him pronouns throughout the 'essay' only due to the fact that those are the cannon pronouns used throughout the movie. Since this is all hypothetical I wasn't sure if I should use he/him or she/her so I followed the ones used in the movie .

Please bear with me as you read this; It is much less an easy and more of a (hopefully) organized collection of thoughts.

The first point I should start with is, yes, I know Charlie's/Nuwanda's character was written to be a ladies man (if not a womanizer, though I wouldn't go that far). He was designed to be the flirty friend from the go. Since that is a key part of his character and who he is, it did help me to come to this idea.

Most people in the fandom seem to agree that most of the main boys are very much queer-coded (intentional or not). Charlie/Nuwanda, however, has always seemed mainly focused on girls. From his teasing of Knox to his newspaper insert and 'Phone Call From God' it seems to be a focus point of his character.

Now, as far as the newspaper and the 'Phone Call From God' is concerned maybe we really can attribute that to him being a ladies man, maybe, but even so doesn't it seem a bit extreme? Even for Charlie/Nuwanda, though he is a bit of a wild card, it's risking a lot and seems a little extreme.

Now, hypothetically speaking, if Charlie/Nuwanda was transitioning or coming out then he'd end up being kicked out of Hellton Wellton anyway for not being a boy. If that was the case he'd really, school wise at least, have nothing to lose. Logically I know he'd be kicked for being trans anyway but we'll say, hypothetically, this was more or less his thought process.

Do I have more info to back this up? Yes, I do.

The day he snuck the article into the newspaper is the same day he brought the girls to the cave. The same day he changed his name to Nuwanda. He revealed his name change to his closest friends, people who he can trust.

Another small thing is when he drew the symbols on his cheeks it was with lipstick. I know it's because what was on hand at the time in the scene but even so. Symbolism?

At first most of the boys seem to more or less think it's a joke and laugh. Later on when then small argument between Charlie/Nuwanda and the others go down both Neil and Cameron put extra emphasis on 'Charlie' instead of Nuwanda which later gets re-addressed after Charlie's/Nuwanda's meeting with Mr. Nolan. "Damnit Neil, the name's Nuwanda."

And that's about all I have so far!

I know these are all very small points but that's my thought process on the whole thing.

For the lesbian head-canon that more or less went along with the trans head-canon. Since Charlie seems to only be interested in girls I head-canoned him as a lesbian (though of course that could absolutely not be the case as well).