#slev

Anyways, the US show for SLEV got cancelled this afternoon and ever since I found out I’ve felt every single emotion possible. I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m disappointed, I’m not very surprised at the same time, overall I’m just very heartbroken over this.

Me and my group of girls within our country have been trying to promote and scream and yell at the cast and producers and promoters for a year now nonstop trying to get them to come here. And it worked. All of our hardworking paid off after months and months of trying to get it out. We’ve contacted Ceci, the network, multiple other networks within the US, literally anyone you could think of that could be involved, we tried talking to.

And eventually they did hear us.

They aired it here and brought massive ratings which we were so thrilled about. It’s so hard to break something international here, but they did it. And that’s huge and amazing. And they answered our prayers even more and brought Karol here to promote it as well and they announced our own show which was above and beyond anything that I could’ve ever dreamed about. Yes it was in Texas which was weird and a strange location, but regardless it was still a show and that’s all that mattered. All of these girls began buying their tickets and plane tickets, hotels, etc... all to be thrown out the window three months later of never ever getting the chance of it to happen again.

And the thing is with me, I was never that obsessed with going to a show. I honestly would have been perfectly fine without going. Seeing my friends and others get the opportunity to go made me feel happier seeing them live out their dreams, and that truly is enough to me. But discovering I did have that chance myself gave me such high hopes and excitement that I would get to experience it myself.

For it to be cancelled let me down all over again. It let down all of my hopes I never wanted to have up in the first place. To give me the false sense of hope is a reckless enough and it completely shatters me inside that it won’t happen.

I had to find this all out at work, the job that i specifically got so i could save enough for this trip there, where I almost burst to tears. Going back into my car is where I let it all out and let all of the reality sink in. All of this work, ALL OF IT, was in total a waste to everyone. All bc they don’t give a literal fuck to actually make it know here. They think that there are better things to worry about than here, more focus on bullshit things that no one could give more of a damn about. Disappointing everyone else in the long run.

I don’t even know where I went with this to be honest. But I know that this will heal for me, that I will be okay. Not now, not today, but eventually I will heal. This really wasn’t fair to anyone, but you know, life moves on and I guess everyone else has to as well.

SLEV

BABY SLEV