#shisui

Groaning, he presses his left hand to his pulsing temple. It feels as if a tiny stone mason was chipping away at the inside of his skull.

He squints, the light pouring into his eyes and sending another spike of pain through his head. Where is he..?

Through the blurry haze of his delirium he can spot the neat furnishings of a living room. Pretty tidy and with the occasional living plant - he certainly isn't home.

He sits up slowly on what he notices is a couch and tries to figure out where he is. He vaguely remembers drinking. The lights of a bar, laughter of lighthearted strangers. But other than that? Blackness.

Great, really. Itachi would beat his ass if he found out he passed out in a street somewhere. His captain would too, for being so reckless. He wasn't usually this dumb. But last night...he needed it.

You're expecting a 16 year old with major depression, anxiety, the weight of over 500 innocent clan members, being led along on a string, used as a tool to.. THINK RATIONALLY? Who was being pressured from both sides to either wipe out the memories of an entire clan or work against a bigger force, WHO SAW NO WAY OUT, to think LOGICALLY.

If I killed Danzo, it would amount to what, everything returning to normal? The Uchiha would be allowed to move back to the village? The coup wouldn't move forward because it definitely still would. Danzo was a major player but he wasn't the only cog in the wheel.

Before anyone asks why didn't I wipe out Fugaku san's memories:

Have you considered.. maybe I didn't want to erase his memories? Or any of my peoples' memories? Maybe I DIDN'T WANT Konoha to have that right over the Uchiha? I didn't want to do that to my own blood? I didn't' want to have that power and betray them?

What was the right answer? Tell me.

Thinking back I wish I had. I wish I had ripped his arms off and ripped his eyeballs out before I allowed him to rip my eye out and stick a part of me in his filthy head. I hate that my eye ever touched his skull and that he used my own eyeball to be a sick freak. I wish I had wiped HIS memories. And then killed him using kotoamatsukami. I could have brainwashed him to slowly torture himself to death.

Every day I wish that.

Are you satisfied anon? Maybe stop blaming me for the colluding of adults and the evil decisions they made. I suffered, trust me I suffered for not doing the right thing at the time. Stop blaming me and stop blaming Ita too.