#seductive suffering

“What is it little love?”

It’s a lifetime,

A eternal promise.

It’s you.

And it’s me.

Go back in time.

Settle in a new place, a new timeline.

Somewhere our lives can begin and end wrapped up.

We are lost to a world we never see.

Lenses changing our perspective.

Pushing to be more or less.

We are lights dancing in vacant skies.

And I’ll meld into you and find myself.

I can see a soundless dance that pulls us together.

A place where two become one.

I may smile.

I make joke.

But my foundation is destroyed.

I am grieving, I am suffering. I am broken.

And I will NEVER not love you.

I’m holding myself.

I’m imagining Your hands where only mine are.

Touch me.

Take me.

I could be perfect with you.

Maybe tomorrow, I’ll feel again.

Maybe tomorrow, I’ll breathe easy.

Maybe tomorrow, I won’t feel pain, sorrow, and contempt.

Maybe today, I’ll fall asleep blissfully unaware of the heaviness in my limbs, my heart.

Maybe today, I won’t feel emotion one can feel.

I mean.

I loved you.

You eyes pay no mind to my penetrating stare.

Your lip quivers;

Your chest heaves.