#scarletpenguin

Nymphomania

I could scarcely believe the words that left my lips. I think some part of me applauded, for when had such bravery alighted in my soul? Had I simply grown up? Had this strength lain within me all this time? I felt the breath of Dayfry on my ear, whispering ancient secrets of sacred love, and Saturn’s steady hands upon my shoulders as he offered me enough nerves to remain upright. Sunnie’s blessing washed across me next, for I could not be more focused if I tried.

“‘Dinner,’” Blonda repeated. She gawked back at me as though I’d transformed into a dragon then and there. In fact, consider that metaphor an accurate one: she trembled just a bit while fingers ran across her platinum hair. Paint the scene as though she turned a museum corner and found a dragon sleeping just a breath away. “You… want to take me out?”

‘In public’ were the words she did not say, yet they took form on the cusp of her brain. She shaped them the way I shaped my fanatic affection. I frowned, quite uncertain of where to meet her dropped-off words. Nonetheless, I cupped them where I could. I kept hold upon her hand, freshly kissed, and drew myself so close to her, I tasted the beat of her core through soft skin. “Well… Yes. Is that such a difficult thing to believe? We have discussed it.” ‘In private,’ I did not remind her. “Were you not the one who invited me ‘on the town’ after we met for lemonade?”

“‘Dinner,’” she said again, looking at me in question. Colour prickled at her cheeks, betraying her in a way that likewise stirred satisfaction in my deepest self. Inside me, some ancient puzzle slid a new piece into place as though guided by the hand of fate.

You only have one shot at this. Why deny yourself? “Yes, that’s what I said. Clean out your ears, woman.” Did my own finger shake? I reached forward nonetheless, aiming to capture her chin, and in doing so, I also caught her eye. I tipped her face just so, and when our gazes linked…

… Well. I simply lost my train of thought. It plunged off the cloudcliffs, hurtling to Earth far below, and must have shattered over rocks or been lost among the sea. In the milk-pink softness of her eyes, I drank the taste of desperation and lapped at the nectar of wanting what could never be. Her gaze absorbed my very essence. All of me, when Blonda dipped her eyes to my feet and slowly drew them up again. Her fingertips hovered against my wrist. She touched gently, like a flower petal, as if unsure whether to push me aside or allow my lingering. We floated above the walking path that separated small student residence buildings from the open woods, and all manner of eyes might peer down at us from the windows or the trees. Yet I could not find it within myself to drop her cheek, nor back away. Had she charmed me with the pheromones that wreathed the air between us? (What little space there remained between us, anyway). Can Fairies do that? Might I be more susceptible than most?

Soft fingers slipped past my waist. They cupped below my wings - far below, in my sitting place - and Blonda touched my crumpled, hidden tail for the very first time. Spittle chilled my mouth. Perhaps she owned my yoo-doo doll. I could not tear my eyes from hers.

“Anti-Cosmo,” she murmured, softly as a snowflake. I sucked in air. Every pin and needle Venus Eros had sewn Cosmo’s doll up with jabbed beneath my skin. Prickles raced themselves up my neck. My wings jerked forward. I think most of my body did, for I fell upon her and she fell upon me; we clung against one another for support while bracing the other up. I stirred against her, and some small part of me awoke.

She called me by my public name. Less intimate than any whisper on Mona’s lips. Why was it, then, that some force compelled me ever closer? To brush my hands against her; reel her tightly in? As I wrapped my hands behind her back, I pressed my nose to her neck and inhaled the cherry scent of pheromones straight beneath my skin. The nutty undertone balanced on my tongue.

Do you really want me, Blonda dear? Oh, how I wished to cry that thought from the rooftops beside us! My wrists shook- My breath crispened like apple pie in a gust of wind. Would I offer myself if she spilled confession that she did? I stirred my tongue, even when Blonda tightened her grip upon my buttock with a squeeze. “We… We’ve dined together before- Perhaps not as a couple, but as ourselves. I daresay it would be appropriate, yes, for us to meet briefly for, um… decompression, and all matter of- of opportune things. You’re very pretty, darling, and your mind delectable.”

I could hear her core pulse very quick then, spinning magic through her lines. Blonda rested her palm behind my head, caging me there against her neck. Her other pressed all the tighter at my rear. Her wings stuttered; it could not be denied. “Do you mean that like a Fairy?” Blonda murmured directly in my ear. It twitched of its own accord. I did not think she could pinch any tighter, and nearly yelped when her nails dug in the soft places my scales ran thin. Her searching eyes combed my face, and she held me there like a dragonfly hoisted in a stained glass lantern. I certainly felt the stains budding in my soul as my thoughts wandered about in all the places they were never meant to go. Blonda tilted her head by a thin degree. Her pale neck, exposed against the air, both wet my mouth and dried it with a longing pant. I think I nearly whined. Unperturbed, she said, “Or does ‘Pretty’ mean something different on your side of the border?”

“Well, this ‘side of the border’ has become my home, in some regard.” I fixed my claws in Blonda’s shirt. She did not deny me when I reeled her lips all the closer up to mine. I twisted them, smiling just a hint, and chuckled at the way she squirmed against my hand. “I’ve lived a long life in Fairy World, my dear. Sometimes I wonder if there’s nothing left of Fairies for me to learn. You’ll prove me wrong, I hope?”

Blonda’s eyes clicked shut, audible with tears. Fairy dust glittered on her cheeks. When she blinked, I expected wetness, but it seemed she’d swallowed most of it away. “And when did you grow such an alluring tongue?”

“When I knew I couldn’t risk my shot at you.” And I laughed a mite louder this time, loosening my grip upon her shirt. Blonda hovered as though conflicted, and while I knew she could poof away if she truly did not desire my advances, it did me no harm to back off a bit. Perhaps I came on strong enough to worry her. “Wanda is in hospital. I daresay that woke me up to the dangers of our campus life. I’ll return to Boudacia soon enough, and then I’m with my godkid until he requires my service no longer. After that, well…”

“… You and Anti-Saffron will be married.”

I twitched my lips in the slightest smile. “Guilty as charged.”

Other secret bonus ending: "Wait a minute, if Hadley's been to Texas a lot because of Pencil Nexus, does she ALSO have fun cosplaying in boots?"

Kisses Full of Broken Glass

Wednesday January 15th, Aurora 178

Year of Water; Winter of the Shattered Lake

Anti-Fairies took care of their own. No one else was going to do it for them (Least of all in Fairy World). Massive oversight, really. Ever since the Barrier separating Hy-Brasil from Tír Ildáthach came down, well… You can’t go three streets anymore without tripping on an Anti-Fairy beneath the dawn-painted skies. Some Fairies went the other way, but not as many as you’d think. They should make their own safe places in Anti-Fairy World. No one else will do it for ‘em.

All this to say, it’s not like Anti-Marigold didn’t trust a well-vetted damsel healthcare center. She did. Actually, growing up, she’d been in and out of one. Anti-Primrose (who didn’t deserve the title Mum) had a nasty habit of getting in trouble with Anti-Fairy Council and leaving her kids hungry at home in the process. First there were drinking problems. Then it was late-night sex work that lost the “work” aspect somewhere along the way. Then came pyramid schemes dressed up in fluff and lace.

Anti-Primrose wanted all of it. Forget black cats, spilled salt, and broken mirrors… You could bait a literal trap in the park with a few bills and coins to lure her in. She hung in a tangled-up corner of the family tapestry, and Anti-Marigold snipped her out the day she got her adult wings. Changed her crystal ball number that week and never answered an unknown call again, no matter how the clouds inside stormed. Honestly, she would’ve stayed in school longer just to keep away from her, but when the offer of sandwich shop work hit the table, the thought of turning profit across the Fairy World border - where Anti-Primrose wouldn’t dare step - caught her by the throat. At home she had two little brothers to look after (No thanks to Anti-Zinnia being absolutely no help). Making time for homework didn’t come easy. Sometimes she slept in class.

So she quit. “Dropped out,” or “Bought the farm” or whatever. Of course, Foop slumped at the thought of never helping her through labs anymore, but his mother pulled Anti-Marigold aside and told her very seriously that sandwiches were “Good business,” and hell; the High Countess had never steered anyone wrong before. Even her husband took her advice, and he hardly listened to himself. It’s a freakin’ miracle Foop turned out so well-adjusted. He should play the lottery. Takes after his mum hardcore.

Which she’s grateful for. Seriously, she’s grateful! This isn’t about not trusting the healthcare centers and it isn’t about wishing Foop would do more when he’s already doing all he can. Flip, if Anti-Wanda ever gave her son The Talk on how to treat a damsel in distress, he must’ve locked in and hung on each no-nonsense word. Did my name ever come up during that conversation? Like, ‘Wait for the right place and time’ or ‘Make sure you treat that sweet girl right.’ Surely it must have. After all, she’s an anti-will o’ the wisp… Their Seelie counterparts are sort of known for getting around (If you know what I mean).

Anti-Marigold did stare after him sometimes (Foop). He just had that sort of face. And hair. And neck. He twitched his nose like a squirrel when grading papers, reading glasses slipping from his ears. Mystique and charm wreathed that open-book nature of his.

How many hours had she passed working on her knitting, sighing at tangled yarn, just to look up and see him lounging like a regal wolf in the sofa cushions, safe and untouchable from the world. He marked papers like he thought them equal to his own. He finished every project ahead of time and cracked open his study books for more. Nothing could catch him off guard. He wouldn’t let himself be anything less than the most intellectual powerhouse he could. She hadn’t told him this (because it wasn’t his business anyway), but Anti-Marigold liked it best when Foop wriggled close and lay his head against her chest. And those eyes, when he looked up-

They were the softest eyes she’d ever seen. She could push her lips against them. She could nuzzle her cheek up with his. She wouldn’t, though. It wasn’t her place. Not when he… Plus his family. Y’know?

Except she had touched him like that. Only sometimes. When they wouldn’t get caught (or sometimes when they would). Real talk? Foop seemed to live his life chasing punishment. He craved it like an ice-cold soda thick with syrup and bubbly carbonation. She saw him crumble - hit the floor - after that first night in the Castle, when his father floated past her with a book under one arm and his mind on politics, saying something to the Head Pixie without turning to Foop for any more than a ruffle of his midnight curls.

He tries harder now (Nearer, louder, more often and more desperate) to draw his father’s ear. Anti-Marigold said nothing about it, of course. She just leaned against him while he buried his face in his hands, heaving sobs that would not bring his father’s ire. They’d go unheard.

“My life’s a joke, Kelsia! How can he tell me stories of how badly he wanted a child if he can’t be bothered to set me straight when I mess around? Does he even remember how young I am? That we aren’t married? Does he know? What else doesn’t he notice? It’s like he’s missing all over again, and we’re still in this smokeforsaken war-”

“You’ve told your mum about us, right?”

“Bloody heck, I couldn’t keep a secret from that woman if I tried. She knows. I just wish he’d yell at me again… He treats me like an egg in his hand. I just want my Da back… I want him back, Kelsia…”

She could understand that, actually. She’d never met her own father. Anti-Quince, apparently. Not to be confused with Anti-James, who’d fathered Anti-Zinnia… Anti-Marigold had two full-wisp brothers through Anti-Quince, and both still too young for their adult anti-names.

Reminder - These are WIP screenshots. The pieces will have proper tags and meta before they're posted. Titles may also change.

Bonus disclaimer: If you see a line in an old WIP that seems familiar... I do yoink things from these sometimes because I wasn't planning to post them, yes <3

This will be the first one:

Exactly what it says on the tin- Super simple.

Here are a few more examples (No specific order)-

A scene from Frayed Knots I've always regretted cutting even though it was for the best, but y'know what? It deserves to be shared because it's funny :)

Another moment from canon translated into my style! There's also a "Flappy finds out Gary and Betty knew about magic the whole time" bit somewhere in here that I had to throw out after "Solo" happened.

I will not apologize for my deity break-up drama. I might apologize for Prince Thursday's seasonal torment, but he's the nature spirit of Leaves, so-

Unpleasant non-con / dubcon situations... We know how this goes.

And the obligatory sequel to the above. That pixie sure can character arc!

Very cursed flirty pixies, my beloved...

Do you have any idea how weird it feels to post pre-reincarnation pieces out of context... skldjf...

It's gross! It's goofy! Cupid's ancestors took her mobility aid because they're unpleasant people! We just keep winning!!

Uncut version of the Ambrolara scenes! I sadly cut some of my favorites lines from "Hate That I Love You" because it would've crossed the line... but I love them....... my cursed OCs who are awful for each other.

No one understands Sanderson's mind, not even me 7 years later... He can do whatever he wants forever.

Foop's romantic scenes during the late-Prompts era are some of my favorite warm-ups... He's here, he's queer, he's having a mental breakdown spitting and crying over his dad not noticing him sneaking in a girl, he was forced to marry someone he desperately does not want to be intimate with, he loves his mom, he's losing the power struggle against his alt personality, he's this close to losing his inheritance, he calls his wife his mistress's name... No one is doing it like him. Probably because he's doing SO bad!!

The preview scene you see in "Trouble Beyond Paradise" finally broke me... It's been a favorite since 2017 and I just really want to share... That one's a multi-chapter and I hope you guys like it. I love Foop/Anti-Marigold and their weird situation... Like, of COURSE if Poof has severe anxiety about accidentally forcing them into dubcon, Foop's genius idea is to get the first time over with before Poof/Goldie can bind them into it. So funny. They are silly little guys... the people have a right to know...

Very old anatomy study. It's about bees ripping apart when they mate. It's... sort of cute? Mostly horrific and full of pain and sobbing? :'D If you pick this up, you will very quickly see why I never intended to post it, but... It's 2024, baby! Welcome to my mind...

- This one will likely get a new title, so be careful if this is one you want to avoid. - Where is that post that goes like "Why do all my ace friends write the most bizarre sex scenes?" followed by "Have to throw in something interesting for us." sdfkj. Yeah... It's me, I'm that guy. And this kind of guy.

And more!! I hope you like reading these old pieces, but if they are not your thing, that is perfectly fine. Some of these are not even my thing, but sometimes you have to write it to know that! Sometimes you knew that and wrote it anyway because ??? idk.

👀 Take a Peek

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Just two works in this AU so far. Keep scrolling!

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Recommended ways to get into the full AU

📅 Main 'Fic - Reedfilter Rules

A pixie would never flirt his way up the corporate ladder. It's simply... not done.

A collection of scenes from multiple POVs, kicking off with Fergus's failing marriage (and Reedfilter hitting on Anti-Cosmo, who's not impressed).

🌄 First Written - "Only an Idea"

The new Head Pixie takes a curious interest in a lowly cubicle worker who wandered into a party.

OR, Sanderson's first encounter with H.P. occurs when he wakes up hungover. H.P. can't get rid of him.

📅 Chronological Start - TBA

Reedfilter Rules is currently the chronological start of this AU, though there may be earlier pieces in the future (since turning this into a series frees me from the restriction of keeping everything within the one work).

🗺️ Worldbuilding

Fairly light worldbuilding, although Anti-Cosmo's POV definitely depicts him rambling on about it since that's kind of his thing as a character. Worldbuilding is pretty much what canon said on the tin: you've got several magical races living in the clouds above Earth, and some of them aren't so nice.

This AU pushes the ideas of the Seelie and Unseelie Courts... Specifically, the idea that Fairies, Pixies, and Anti-Fairies are all mischief-makers. Fairies just have a prettier reputation in human eyes... but the humans aren't here right now. Are they?

There are tons of species in this world, but they're considered their own unique species (as opposed to Cloudlands AU where they're considered Fairy subspecies).

Fairy World is a melting pot that welcomes people of any race

Seasonal Strength - Magic ebbs and flows with the seasons, affecting how willing each race is to use their magic (especially against the other races).

🌸 - Pixie World gets a boost in spring

☀️ - Fairy World gets a boost in summer

🍁 & ❄️ - Anti-Fairy World's two realms get boosted in Autumn and Winter (respectively).

Anti-Fairies also get a boost every Friday the 13th. Pixies get a boost in late November (Gray Tuesday mention!) and Fairies on October 31st / November 1st (Samhain). Magical creatures can influence their surroundings - Anti-Cosmo sussed out H.P. Reedfilter when she stood on a beach, causing the surf to lap more intensely around her than elsewhere.

Pixie Culture - Pixie culture is about placing career above all, with the Head Pixie micromanaging everything (right down to who you're paired with, when you can reproduce, and when your relationship ends).

Anti-Fairy Culture - Anti-Fairies care deeply about their culture. In-story, Anti-Fairies use special given names unconnected to those of their counterparts. There's a lot more going on in their world than "plotting evil," though they're shameless about their mischief.

Anti-Fairies are very proud of their culture and individuality. It's important to them that they are self-sufficient and aren't tied to their counterparts... hence why it would be a huge scandal if it came out that Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda had an affair.

In this AU, Anti-Cosmo's elder brother (Prince Mon d'lin) was meant to become High Count after his father. His elder brother's gone missing, heavily implied to be Anti-Cosmo's doing.

Anti-Cosmo is supposed to find a partner to rule beside him because magical strength shifts by season. You want both an Autumn and a Winter Court ruler on the throne at any one time... and A.C.'s bachelor days are numbered.

Also, Anti-Fairy names share their naming style with Cloudlands AU. Find a post with sample names HERE.

Genderfluidity - Fae can (and do) often change their bodies, both in anatomy and presentation. Fergus's partner Sapphire is a great example since she changes her identity every 500 years. Anti-Cosmo also flips between masculine and feminine presentations (with name adjustments reflecting this in line with Anti-Fairy name traditions).

📋 AU Notes & Warnings

Heavy focus on Pixies and Anti-Fairies. Doesn't focus on much else, as I find H.P., Sanderson, Anti-Cosmo, and Anti-Wanda pretty interesting. That said, I'm not opposed to writing other POVs (like Cosmo, Wanda, Juandissimo, and Jorgen) if I think up interesting plots for them.

Death Mentions - This AU doesn't have anything I'd call major character death, but Rani Reedfilter does drown. It's not graphic, but is mentioned repeatedly.

Expect threats to be tossed around, but this AU focuses more on intimidation, manipulation, and seduction than violence.

Anti-Fairy Feeding - Anti-Fairies are like vampire bats. They drain energy from others' bodies. The neck is a classic way to get a lot of energy, but biting a finger or wrist works well.

H.P. has a lot of scars on his hands from feeding Talon. Occasionally he feeds Anti-Cosmo, though A.C. claims Fairies are more nutritious.

Interspecies Relationships (and disdain for them) - Other pixies tend to look down on Fergus and Sanderson since they have will o' the wisp mothers. They are the only non-full-blooded pixies known to the universe during Reedfilter Rules.

Fairies, Anti-Fairies, and Pixies can change their bodies and reproduce with each other (and with other magical species, such as the wisps mentioned above).

Seduction - Fergus will flirt with anyone who might give him a leg up in life, even if he feels little to no attraction himself. Chiefly that means Reedfilter (the Head Pixie before him) and... Anti-Cosmo. However, other folks such as Anti-Wanda and Jorgen are theoretically on the table. Or the Fairy Council members, for that matter.

Anti-Cosmo is also totally down to flirt with people, again whether he's attracted or not. He's less interested in climbing political ladders and mostly flirts because it's fun.

I've previously said Jorgen is a no for them to flirt with because he's a rule-follower and not the type to go for seduction, which will almost certainly remain true.

They're mean to each other, they're implying things that have never happened, and it means NOTHING to them; do u see my vision?

Seductions can include one-night stands, longer-term flings, infidelity, and a general vibe of innuendo throughout this AU.

I'd say... Tentatively expect making out and potential sex scenes, but you shouldn't be surprised if those things appear in a more censored form (Ex: Heavily implied or fade to black). Not sure how much detail we'll get, but Reedfilter Rules is marked M, so it could definitely go that way.

My OG draft for Fergus seducing Rani (written 2016) probably took things farther than any other FOP work I've posted to date, and I've written alt (more censored) versions several times, but... that OG really calls to me as my favorite version, so I waffle between "Is this too much for people who've come to expect tame content from me after 8 years?" and "I really like this version better." I've gotten bolder about posting M or E works in recent years, so... /shrug.

As always, my M and E works are kept under my #ScarletPenguin pseud on AO3 so they can be easily avoided if you browse my main page (or easily found if you want them). Also, AO3 has a built-in filter system on user pages you can use to filter out such works with a few clicks, which people who read on AO3 probably know, so maybe I'm just being over-paranoid... :')

Light Romance - Anti-Cosmo is semi-seeking a partner to settle with. He flirts a lot and has a growing crush on both H.P.... and Anti-Wanda, although he tries not to let on.

Pregnancy & Childbirth - Definitely exist in this AU and are referenced on occasion. However, these don't play a large role, nor do I intend to portray them graphically.

There may be upset stomachs and pain mentions, along with conversation revolving around children (Ex: Speculating parenthood)

Other Drama - General political and magical drama, such as Pixies working on 37-year plans while Anti-Fairies get extra mischievous on Friday the 13th. Bickering over land, resources, godkids, and Da Rules. Messing with Jorgen. Stealing stuff. Also, cultural differences causing interpersonal conflict.

Sanderson is sex-repulsed in this AU and only bonded with his first match, so he ignores all orders to sleep with the 2nd he was assigned to (to H.P.'s severe annoyance because he can't stand this guy pushing back).

This AU is still pretty rough since it's a collection of many pieces and they're shared with the public only when I'm 100% satisfied with the world they present. These are the big-picture issues I foresee, but there's potential for more.

If you think of any warnings I missed, please let me know!

✋ Notable Posts & Asks

Cloudlands AU was called Riddleverse Classic prior July 2024.

"Could you tell us more about the Reedfilter AU? What makes it different? Any favorite parts or ideas in mind?"

-> HERE - Outlines major characters

"Without too many spoilers, who is Rani Reedfilter and how does her leadership style compare to Fergus? How did she get her position, and are either of them better than the other as Head Pixie? How long did it takes for Fergus to seduce Rani?"

-> HERE - Rani details

"Once he’s Head Pixie, what does Fergus see in Sanderson, and how (If at all) does that slowly morph into an actual friendship? What surprises him about Sanderson? Fergus seduces others and uses sex in the most calculated, un-loving ways possible, so what is it like for him to NOT take things with Sanderson in that direction?"

-> HERE - Sanderson details & a clarification that sex isn't Fergus's go-to tactic.

"You’ve given us some info on how A.C. and H.P. get along (which also makes some talks between them in Fairy Baby seem even more flirtatious now) but how does Jorgen fit into things? Did H.P. ever try to seduce him? Did A.C. ever try to seduce him!? (Trying to seduce Jorgen honestly sounds like a competition just dumb enough for them to try)"

-> HERE - H.P.-Jorgen rivalry, A.C.-Jorgen rivalry, & info on Pixie World's size.

Doodles & Talon's AU introduction -> HERE

"How does Longwood fit into the Reedfilter AU? Do any other pixies that we know of from Origins/Knots play any notable roles?"

-> HERE - Explanation on how parallel universes work in all my FOP worldbuilding & Longwood details (Daddy issues)

"Is Anti-Sanderson still Head Anti-Pixie in Reedfilter Rules AU? If not, what's he like?"

-> HERE - No anti-pixies in this AU

"In the Reedfilter AU, what are common stereotypes for Pixies, Anti-Fairies, and Fairies compared to Classic? Also, does the hierarchy established by the Eros family still exist?"

-> HERE - Rivalries & explanation on unique species for this AU

"In classic, it seems like H.P. tries to take over Fairy World more for attention than anything else. What are his motivations for “evil plans” in Reedfilter Rules?"

-> HERE - RR!H.P. is less extreme. "He’s more relaxed, less aggressive, and less likely to grab the spotlight. He still enjoys the spotlight, but the attention is a side benefit and not the main goal."

- More Fairly OddParents works

- Want more info? Send an Ask!

You can create works based on this AU. Please cite me and/or the AU as appropriate (i.e. for things very specific to this AU). You are free to expand on ideas you've thought of thanks to my AU as a jumping off point. I'd love to reblog or link things to my AO3 works if I see them!

New Rules

- 🥀 -

Martyn Littlewood started dyeing at age 31.

Every day, 6:15 AM, Cleo stands by the stairs that lead down to the subway, waiting by the window while Martyn rips flowers from his skin. The stems snap off, but the roots remain. They’ve got him so fiercely, tongue-tied and ripped apart, that every time he laughs, he sounds more undead than alive. How many surgeries can a florist afford to get those things removed? Or does he do it all himself? He looks awful sometimes (especially in the summer) when thorny vines wrap his arms and legs. Sometimes his arms hang like limp meat at his sides. The tubes, canes, and chairs he uses look increasingly expensive.

32-year-old Martyn Littlewood runs the flower shop in Aqua Town. Cleo’s stepped through that door to stand among lush, strong-scented plants more times than she’d care to admit. They’re… cordial. At least, Martyn doesn’t seem to hate her. She’s never hated him.

“Well, you’ve made me a rich man. I don’t spend a lick on material. It just comes to me.” He crushes blue petals with a squeeze of his hand. Cleo grips her bag in one hand, gazing back over the rims of her sunglasses. Martyn has stitch marks up and down his face. All over his hands. There’s one right across his forehead. He wears a neck brace now. Or if it’s not a brace, it’s some sort of bandage. All her own marks are zombie-themed tattoos. They fit her zombie aesthetic. The aesthetic came first. He smiles, painfully from behind the counter, and threads baby’s breadth in a bouquet as a filler flower. It’s coming back in style, he says, after a decade of it being overdone. Honestly, Cleo doesn’t get why he even tries selling the flowers; he should stick to dye. Everything is dying here. Except his energy, when he says, “What brought you in here, m’dude? Hot date tonight?”

There’s silk and chocolate in his voice. It catches her through the gut, like she tripped and speared herself on a stalagmite. Uh. Cleo lifts one finger to the window. “You took down your neopronouns sign. I just wanted to ask what’s up; if you’re okay.”

The sign was mangrove wood and cut in the shape of a peony. Martyn flicks his eyes to the place it used to hang, then goes back to work. “Aw, that… Well, flower pronouns aren’t super practical when I’m in the shop. I’m looking for others. Something more versatile. Nothing has that same rush, but I’m not giving up.”

That makes sense. Does that make sense? He doesn’t look at her. “You’re still wearing your wedding ring,” she says without thinking. Martyn stops. His eyes stay pinned on the nearest wilting rose.

“Yeah. Are you not cool with that?”

It’s not a challenge, but she knows he’d shove back if she pushed. It’s easier, running fingers through her hair. “Honestly, it’s fine. Mine’s still on the bathroom counter. I see it every day. Sometimes I still wear it. Mostly when I’m out with Scott or Cub.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Martyn nods. His hands move again, fluffing the tiny flowers from below. “People talk.”

“They do.”

He clears his throat in his fist. Cleo moves away, examining the fridges in the back so he can cough up petals without an ex hovering around him. His coughs are thick and damp. He stands and leaves the room.

- 🌹 -

Martyn’s work often took him away from Hermit Hills. He and his best friend ran a summer camp called Dogwarts out in the flats, in that little piece of rumpled land that sat too near the desert for the local farmers to take an interest. She met Martyn because of that camp, actually, when they were 24 and 25 and he reached out with a little Hey, I love your work and we’re mutual friends with Scott and Pearl email to ask if she’d do a presentation on insects and other forest wildlife for the kids. He said his usual presenter was out tagging eagles that week, and honestly… Where do you even go from that? He and Ren offered good money, too. She could probably type up her research remotely for a few days. A few weeks. Even if she didn’t make as much progress as she’d like, the network opportunity might be worth its weight in diamond blocks.

“You should,” Scott encouraged when she called him up to check if this Martyn guy really was his friend. “Pearl and I are counselors. We can all hang out together! And you can tell the kids about that time you bottle-fed the bear cubs.”

… Yeah, all right. She worked more often with bats, but talking about the bear cubs always turns eyes her way. Wildlife rehabilitation isn’t really a standalone career, and that’s a good thing to prepare kids for at an animal-lovers camp. She could still smell the baby formula blended with blueberries, the cubs with creamy droplets smeared across their muzzles and cheeks.

She took the offer. Three weeks later, there she was… Camp Dogwarts and its insects, poison ivy, and whatever else lay waiting for her. Cleo basked a few last seconds in the bliss of the air conditioning, then switched off the car and stepped into summer sun. Martyn and Ren both shook her hand, beaming. He/him or flower/rose. He/they/it or neopronouns that fit a canine theme. They said it back to back, fluidly and effortless.

Cleo paused. Then, “She/her professionally. I’ve… considered experimenting, but my social life’s been tied to work for so long, I don’t know where to start.” With Scott, obviously, but pronouns sounded like such a big commitment. Ren clasped their hands; if they’d had a tail, it would have wagged. And he probably would have loved that.

“Oh, dude! We have so much to talk about! Can I call you ‘dude?’”

“Sure. That’s fine.”

Martyn gave the tour while Ren and the counselors kept an eye on the kids. The hilltop pergola made a perfect lookout point. Martyn shielded his eyes, then pointed across the field to a second hilltop building in the distance. “Bean Hill. Rrrrright over there, that’s the edge of camp.”

His eyes? Flower’s eyes? She understood the pronouns in theory, though trying to wrap her mind around them left her suddenly aware of everything she didn’t know. She felt like she’d been stripped, her clothes dunked in the lake. “Cozy place,” she replied. “You and Ren built all this?”

“Yes, ma’am! Placed every block with our own four hands.” And they talked about that, soaking in the sunlight, until Cleo asked the itchy question that wouldn’t leave her thoughts alone.

“Real quick… You don’t have to get into it, but how did you find neopronouns that were right for you? Or… how did you decide to take that leap? I imagine people talk. Ask a lot of questions. So, you must be pretty committed to them if you share them openly.”

Martyn gazed out across the hill, sighing through his(?) nose. “I use them at camp. Not so much at home. I don’t dare discuss it with my parents.” Then, leaning rose’s shoulder (was that right?) on the pergola support, flower said, “You know that discourse that goes around every once in awhile about gift giving being a ‘selfish’ love language? Or have you ever heard someone talk about how they’d never be able to stand dating someone who sort of expected gifts throughout the year?”

“Yeah?”

“It’s like that. I’ve always thought gift giving wasn’t so much about what was given as it was about the thought that you exist in someone’s mind even when you’re not there in front of them. Like, they care enough about you, they wanted you to know they saw something and thought of you. When someone puts the thought into my pronouns… it means they thought about me. And the world is better.” Flower bent down and pulled a dandelion from the grass. “Ren says it would probably be called it/its more often if it really did have a werewolf form, and sometimes that feels good and sometimes it’s lonely. I dunno… Everyone’s just out here getting by, I guess. It’s worth having something to smile about every day. Neopronoun use is like that for me. Free smiles in the tip jar.”

“I’m not sure tips are free.”

Flower laughed like a cawing crow. They had the tour and sat together at the wooden tables at the pergola for dinner. Ren too, of course; pup turned out to be just as knowledgeable about the local area as pup was friendly, especially where the plants were concerned. Not quite as familiar with bugs and bats. “But that’s where you come in, dude! Oh, I’m so ready for this...”