Insanity (Arkham!Riddler one-off)
Warnings: swearing, violence, murder, implied sexual content
The hostages that Edward took in usually annoyed the shit out of him.
The pure idiocy of the people that screamed and shouted, pleading for their lives, asking what they did wrong proved that perhaps, his mind really was the greatest in Gotham.
However, there was one person who broke that trend. One person who truly tested his limits.
After getting kidnapped by a few of his thugs outside a bar one night, this woman woke up strapped to an asylum chair in a dark room, green hues reflecting off of the worn concrete surfaces of the warehouse she found herself in.
“So the imbecile is awake.” Edward snarked. The hostage struggled a bit before giving up, her steely blue eyes flashing him a annoyed glare.
“You’re the newest player in the little game I’ve put together for Batman. If that rodent-costumed thug does his job, you’ll get to live.”
The girl sighed, already put out by the whole situation. This made Edward a bit uneasy; frustrated, even. As much as he hated hearing people scream, he found that this hostage’s slight irritation was even worse. Does she know who’s presence she’s in? The absolute genius that stands before her?
“You always give him too much of a chance.” She said, causing Edward to tilt his head.
“What? What do you mean?”
“I mean, all your riddles are easy. They’re ones everyone’s heard before. ‘The more of me there is, the less you see?’ Come on, man.”
Edward stepped back, dumbfounded by this girl’s courage. He stammered, adjusting his glasses and stomping closer, leaning down to meet her face. “Well do you have something better?”
“Of course not. That’s your job. I’m just giving you some constructive criticism.”
Edward scoffed and stood up straight, turning around and shaking his head. “Just who do you think you are, anyway?”
“A very tired, very unafraid bartender. You?”
“You know damn well who I am!” He growled, leaning his arms and head on his cane soon after with a sigh. “Look... you can make this a lot easier for me and yourself if you just stopped talking.”
“You initiated it, genius. Besides, I find this quite enjoyable.” She stated with a sly smile.
“Really? Well the puzzle I have planned for Batman will be anything but. If he fails this challenge, and he will, the you’ll be the sorry little soul that has to pay for it. Does that sound enjoyable, smartass?”
She thought for a moment, contorting her face as she processed his words. Edward watched with an ever-growing smile, assuming that he finally got to her.
“Well... define ‘pay for it.’”
“DEATH! YOU WILL DIE A HORRIBLE, NIGHTMARISH DEATH AT THE HANDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT HIMSELF AND I WILL FINALLY BE VICTORIOUS, ALRIGHT?”
She adjusted herself in the squeaky asylum chair that she was strapped to and tilted her head with a chuckle. “You turn tomato red when you’re angry. It’s cute.”
Edward flinched, glaring at his hostage quizzically. He turned even redder. “You’re inconceivable.” He grumbled before turning away, disappearing back into the darkness. “You’ll be here for a few days, so get comfortable. Your end will come soon enough.”
As he trekked back to his control room, which was full of gadgets, gizmos, and many computer monitors containing all his plans, he felt a searing heat boiling in his chest.
The girl’s got nerve, I’ll give her that. He thought.
But “cute?” who does she think I am?
He plopped into his swivel chair, feeling his tense muscles relax into the cheap leather. There was something about this girl that struck a different chord in him. Perhaps her wittiness and carefree nature could be used to his advantage. Was she really the type that should be sacrificed in his fight against Batman, or could she help him in different ways?
As he contemplated this, he glanced out his window, looking down at the hostage, a dim green light shining on her like a spotlight in the middle of the dark warehouse.
Much to his surprise, she was staring right back.
Edward yawned, checking the green digital clock that sat to the right of his desk. It was 7 am, and he’d stayed up all night working on his masterpiece of a puzzle for Batman. He rubbed his eyes, muttering a curse under his breath as he loathed his disgraceful sleep schedule.
He looked down through his window, watching his hostage’s chest heave inwards and outwards as she rested. She looked wildly uncomfortable. A pang of guilt resonated through his chest before he swept it under the rug, reminding himself that she was merely a hostage, much like the hundreds of others before her.
However, his mind kept wandering.
How can someone manage to look so desirable in such an undesirable situation?
He felt his face heat up. This woman was proving to be a puzzle on-par with one of his own. Needless to say, it was... invigorating.
Feeling a sudden rush of curiosity, he made his way down the stairs of his office, making a hesitant beeline straight for her. He crept up slowly, grabbing a nearby wooden chair and pulling it up in front of her. He swung his legs and sat on it backwards, placing his forearms on the chair’s top rail and resting his head on them.
He was fully aware of how creepy this must look, but he reassured himself that the judgement of others shouldn’t get to him. Their minds just aren’t able to comprehend his methods.
Edward jumped, nearly falling out of his chair. One of his lesser-minded henchmen decided to drop in and ruin the moment.
“Shhhh! Shut up, you imbecile!” He whisper-screamed. “What did I tell you about letting yourself in uninvited?!”
The henchman frantically shuffled his feet before running off like a startled mouse.
“You mindless bovine...” Edward muttered.
“Well, that’s one way to wake up. You’ve really gotta work on your hospitality, Nygma.”
Edward turned, seeing his hostage wide awake, watching her roll her neck in a circle. Several cracks resonated through the warehouse.
He smiled. A devious, snarky smile. His glasses reflected the emerald light in the room, making his eyes look like those of a phantom. He pulled the chair back under himself, scooting closer to her with furrowed brows. “That’s ‘Riddler’ to you, my dear.”
“And I’m Mania.” She bluntly corrected.
“Mania...” Edward echoed. “Goddess of insanity. You live up to the name.”
“Hah! Like I haven’t heard that one before.”
Edward would normally get inpatient with people like her, always snapping back with something witty and arrogant, much like Selina Kyle. Mania, however, made him want more. His heart began beating faster and he took a moment to compose himself.
“Why aren’t you scared?” He questioned, one eyebrow raising along with his level of confusion. “You’re a hostage— my hostage— you’re as good as dead.”
“Well in that case...” she leaned closer, the leather straps that restrained her squeaking against each other. “Might as well live it up while I still can, right?”
Her voice was smooth, alluring. Her eyelashes fluttered to a half-lidded gaze, lips parting slightly as her warm breath tickled the peach fuzz on Edward’s nose. He didn’t flinch or move back, but held his ground, ensuring that Mania knows about the balance of power in this warehouse.
He was the genius— the hostage taker and determining factor of her fate.
She was merely a barkeep who didn’t know when to shut up.
However, despite these factors, Mania managed the unthinkable. Somehow freeing one arm from her bonds, she grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him forward, smashing her lips against his. He yelped into her mouth, eyes wide open as he struggled, mind contradicting with his heart as he found a part of himself enjoying the closeness.
He tore himself from his feelings, pushing himself away from her and wiping his lips vigorously with his wrist, panting hard. His glasses lay lopsided on his face and hair messed and frayed from Mania’s wandering hand as he stared at her in disbelief.
“You’re going to pay for that!” He growled, pointing a skinny finger at her. “No one takes advantage of me. No one!”
“Yet, somehow, here we are.”
Edward opened his mouth to argue more, but immediately voted against it. She wasn’t worth his time.
She’ll be dead in a day anyway, right?
“Have you ever been with anyone, Eddie?”
Edward stopped typing, fingers frozen steadily on the keyboard as his body tensed up. Mania had been trying to talk to him all morning, but this was the question that finally riled him up. He swallowed hard before turning around. He composed himself and looked at her through his office window, trying his hardest to remain stoic.
“What are you implying, Mania?” He barked over his microphone.
“I’m not implying anything. I’m just curious.”
He was at odds with himself. Should he give her an answer? And if so, should he tell her the truth? What does it matter to her if he’s gotten physical with somebody before?
“I find the act to be quite futile.” He responded.
She paused. “So, I’ll take that as a ‘no’.”
“But you never gave me a real answer, either.”
He sighed, rubbing his temples. “I haven’t.” He mumbled, eyes flicking down towards hers fleetingly, waiting for the judgement he knew would soon arrive. “B-But it doesn’t matter. I’ve never had the desire to do such a thing anyway.”
Figuring that dismissal was the best course of action, he turned back towards his computer and began typing again.
“That’s awfully brave coming from a man who thinks about me so often.”
He stopped once again. “Excuse me?”
“There’s something I forgot to mention to you, Eddie. Remember that... exchange we had earlier?”
Edward shuddered at the thought of it. The ghost of her hands grasping his neck and the warmth of her soft lips against his— even the memory didn’t last nearly as long as he wished it had.
“I can see that.” She chuckled, adjusting herself in her chair. “What if I told you that it wasn’t just a kiss that you were sharing with me, but your mind as well?”
“You see, I have abilities, Edward. Abilities that allow me to bind my mind to that of any person that I kiss. Now, whatever you think, I can see.
“That’s impossible. You’re just playing with my head, not using it. Regardless, it won’t happen again.”
“You need proof? I’ve got it.”
Edward scoffed, but he could feel anxious heat rise into his cheeks.
“Last night, you were working, as usual, but you couldn’t get the thought of our kiss out of your head.”
“False.” He barked, denying her claim instantly.
“It became so engrained in your mind that work became impossible, so you stopped, only to feel the heat in your chest getting hotter and hotter.”
“Stop. Stop it now!” Edward began pacing around his office angrily.
“You touched your lips— grazed your hand on the back of your neck to try and mimic the things you felt in the moment that our lips connected.”
“I’m warning you, I will kill you right here and now if you don’t stop.”
“Shuddering, you felt yourself crumble under your own touch, collapsing into your desk chair with a sense of guilt and defeat washing over you.”
He began to march down from his office and towards Mania with vigor.
“Having never been shown affection of any sort in your life, you craved more. However, you believed that could never be possible...”
He stood a few feet away, chest heaving with anger. “Enough.” He said.
Mania simply blinked in his direction. “...as nobody could ever love a reclusive, hotheaded, egotistical maniac like yourself.”
“I said ENOUGH!” Edward screamed, rushing towards Mania full-force, grabbing her by her neck and breathing heavily.
“You have NO RIGHT to be snooping around inside my head. I DEMAND you break the link right now, before I do the same to your neck!”
He watched the color slowly start to leave her face and gasped as he noticed her looking right back at him, smiling. Her eyes were like dark little voids. He loosened his grip and stepped away in fear, both of them catching their breath. He collapsed onto the floor, hands holding him up under the cold concrete as tears began to well up in his eyes. “Get... get out of my head.” He gasped. “Please...”
Mania stayed silent, watching Edward with a terrifying smirk.
Still shaking, Edward wills himself to get up, catching his breath. His cheeks red and damp from his tears, he shuffled his feet towards Mania. She stared at him with those same cocky eyes. That’s when Edward realized:
She wanted this to happen. This was her plan all along.
He began to unbuckle her restraints, watching her fall to the floor, hands wrapping around the bruises that had begun to form around her neck.
“You know, I’ll admit, I was starting to like you.” He said, his voice still shot from his emotional break earlier. He wiped the tears from his face and knelt down next to her on the floor, tilting his head and watching as her raspy, labored inhales echoed throughout the warehouse.
Mania chuckled, a sadistic smile creeping onto her face. “Cute,” she coughed.
That word made him twitch, but he retained his composure. “I thought, ‘finally, an intellectual— someone who’s cunning might match my own.’”
Mania listened, laughing once or twice during his pause.
“But you know what I realized?”
He stood up, his footsteps resonating off of the concrete floors as he disappeared into the darkness, the sharp noise of metal clanking before he returned, his old, rusty question mark cane in hand.
“You’re no better than the fuckin’ bat.”
And with that, he raised the cane high, nearly falling under it’s weight before smashing it down on Mania’s head, one of the sharp, blocky corners penetrating her skull flawlessly, killing her in an instant.
He panted; droplets of blood splattering on his glasses and face as he yanked the cane out, opening the fatal wound further before stumbling backwards, watching as the pool of blood grew around his victim’s head.
After a few moments— ones that seemed centuries longer than they were— he clapped his hands three times, summoning one of his goons to the scene.
“Jesus...” the goon whispered upon entering. “What happened, boss?”
“Natural selection.” He said before turning towards the goon. “Some people just don’t deserve to pass on their genes, now do they?”
The goon shook his head slowly, “I suppose not, sir.”
“Hm...” Edward took one last glance at her body, feeling a chill run up his back. He shivered, wiping blood from his face and looking away. “Very well. Dispose of her for me, and tell the others to find some other chump for this next riddle.”
The goon nodded, making his way towards Mania’s body before Edward lightly grabs his arm, stopping him and leaning towards his ear.
“And please— make sure this next hostage is a real idiot this time.”
