The Life That We Live
Jayce is growing more and more frustrated with not knowing what plagues Viktor, and after a talk with Caitlyn assumes the worst. He becomes determined to get answers. AO3
Jayce found peace in the forge. He couldnât afford to get lost in his thoughts while smelting, not unless he wanted to lose a hand or suffer serious burns.
Taking a small break to mop the sweat from his face, Jayce was hit with the running thoughts he went to the forge to avoid. Usually if he had a problem, or even petty complaints, he could turn to Viktor.
Who would give his own ideas for problems or just listen as Jayce vented with a small frown. When what was causing him the most stress was Viktor, Jayce found himself stranded without a lifeline.
His mother would listen if he went to her for advice, but she didnât know Viktor the way Jayce did and would tell Jayce to give his mate space.
Jayce still couldnât understand the way Viktor would âdisconnectâ from emotions.
The first time Jayce had witnessed it, Viktor had told him how his mother died of tumors that spread through her body with a clinical detachment. How she became so weak that at the end she couldnât open her mouth enough to allow water to drip through her lips.
He had shrugged off Jayceâs condolences with a wave of his hand, saying that her type of death wasnât uncommon in the Undercity. Jayce had been taken aback at the apparent coldness.
However, the rest of the day Viktor had been subtly different, if Jayce hadnât watched and committed to memory everything Viktor did on the daily then he would have missed it.
What others viewed as cold indifference was a sort of coping mechanism, likely developed over years of pain and watching people around him suffer for no reason.
Jayce tried to be there for the man over the years, hoping that once Viktor knew Jayce was there for him the omega would come to him for support.
It had been naive of him; years of unhealthy coping mechanisms donât disappear with a warm hug and Jayce was aware that he had problems as well.
Jayce placed his hands on the table and let his head drop to his chest, frustration was breeding into something darker. He needed to get a grip before he reacted rashly, twisting Viktors arm to get him to talk would be a betrayal of the deepest level.
Yet a hushed voice that was banished to the back of his mind demanded answers.
They were partners in every sense of the word and were meant to support each other. Getting so locked out so quickly left a bleeding wound in his chest, questions bubbling forth that him staring at the ceiling desperate for answers only his mate could give.
Jayce felt alone in a way he had forgotten about and the empty spot in their bed mocked him with its coldness. Jayce shook his head and turned back to the forge, desperate to do anything productive.
The sound of a throat being cleared had him spinning around, hope that it could be Viktor filling his veins despite how rarely Viktor visited. It filtered out when he saw Caitlyn, her arms crossed as she looked at the mess he had created.
Trying not to let his disappointment show Jayce grabbed a shirt that had been thrown carelessly to the floor, âyou donât usually come to the forge. Whatâs wrong?â
Caitlyn had visited the forge a handful of times, but only after particularly brutal rows with her parents. Jayceâs shirt stuck unpleasantly to his sweaty skin, but he ignored it for Caitlynâs sake.
The teens arms were still crossed, and she leveled him with a glare that screamed Viktors influence.
âI was stood up. Quite rudely in fact.â
For a moment all thoughts of Viktor were replaced by a consuming desire to hunt down whoever had hurt her. Then realization flooded in, he had forgotten his promised teatime with her.
Jayce pinched between his eyes and sighed, âshit Caitlyn. I'm sorry, itâs just-âhe let out another sigh.
âIâve had a lot on my plate recently.â
Caitlyn lowered her arms, and a look of concern replaced the one of annoyance.
âWhatâs wrong?â
Jayce hated unloading his problems onto Caitlyn, she was too young to have to shoulder his concerns despite her maturity.
Yet she knew and cared for Viktor, saw parts of him that most people overlooked.
âItâs Viktor.â
A true testament to how fond she was of Viktor was the way her scent spiked at the quiet admission.
The beta stepped forward, âwhat happened? Is he sick? Hurt?â The questions brought back a memory of a similar occurrence from over a year ago.
Viktor had gotten sick, the type of sick that had him in the hospital for three days.
Jayce had been a mess.
Viktor had forced the alpha out of the room after Jayce had snapped at a nurse for what Jayce saw as unnecessary force while she changed Viktors IV.
Caitlyn had been the one to find him then as well.
âJayce?â
Worry dripped from the betaâs words and Jayce quietly shook himself back to the present.
âHeâs closed himself off completely and I donât know why. Somethings bothering him, upsetting him in a way I've never seen. I asked if it was me, but he gave me some cryptic âitâs not you itâs meâ response.â
Jayceâs fist clenched as his chest tightened, âwhatever heâs hiding is serious and I- I donât know what to do.â
The admissions did nothing to ease Jayceâs mind, only adding guilt to it for unloading it all onto a teenager. The alpha looked to the young woman, an apology on his lips but stopped at her determined expression.
âOk, let's think this through.â
Caitlyn took a step away and crossed her arms, a sign she was focused.
âI hate to ask, but could it be your relationship?â
Jayce flinched slightly at that, despite asking himself that very question hundreds of times.
âItâs strained, we donât share a bed anymore and Iâm positive Viktor is avoiding me outside of the lab. Even inside it if Iâm honest. But heâs always been upfront before if it's something between us.â
Caitlynâs shoulders dropped just slightly in relief, âalright thatâs good. So, if itâs not you and not about the two of you then it has to be something with him.â
Part of Jayce wanted to shoot back that he already knew that, but he held his tongue.
âThe most obvious thing I can think of is-.â
She stopped and looked every bit like a teenager out of her depths when she looked back to the alpha.
âHas-has he been going to the doctor more often?â
What she was implying hit Jayce with the force of a carriage. That Viktor was sick with something medication and rest couldnât heal. Every instance of Viktor bringing up his own death as a passing remark rang loudly through the man's head.
Jayce had never entertained the idea that Viktor would die before thirty, it was impossible to fathom.
âNo! No, he would- if it was something like that, heâd tell me.â
Yet Jayce knew his partner well enough to know that Viktor wouldnât, would plan his own funeral and be staring death in the eyes before Jayce knew their days together were limited.
It was entirely too cramped in the forge; he took a step back and collided with machinery.
Caitlyn watched him with wide eyes and jerked forward with hands raised when his back collided with an errant screw.
âWe donât know if itâs something like that! It could just be something small, or he could be worried about something entirely different.â
Jayce forced himself to breathe and get a check on his emotions, Caitlyn would be jumpy from his agitated scents alone.
Jayce looked at her and gave a jerky nod, âI promised to give him space, but I canât keep going like this.â
Caitlyn nodded at the admission and lowered her arms, âalright. Just try to be gentle. And please. Let me know whatever it is, big or small, he is my brother-in-law after all.â
Jayce smiled at that and finally the vice grip around his heart faded enough to breathe, âI will Cait, thank you.â
After bidding farewells Jayce watched the betaâs back retreat and despite the guilt still present from burdening her, he felt oddly better. The icy fear over what Viktor may reveal was deeply rooted in his bones, but he needed to know now.
Their apartment door was as unassuming as ever, but Jayce still hesitated. His hand grasping the doorknob tightly. He knew Viktor was inside and tried to think of how to âgentlyâ demand answers.
With a steadying breath he opened the door, revealing Viktor hunched over the coffee table writing something with a small bag next to his legs. At the entrance of Jayce, the omega stared at him with wide eyes and an almost guilty expression.
âYou are back already?â
Things clicked at the words, the bag, the note, and the guilt all lead to one answer.
âYou're leaving?â
Jayce could hear how betrayed he sounded but didnât care about that or how loud his voice was. Gentle was no longer an option.
âIt is just for a day. It has been too long since my last visit to my aunt.â
The excuse was a shit one and stoked a fire in Jayceâs veins.
âDonât fucking lie to me Viktor! Why are you really leaving?â
The omegaâs lips curled into a sneer at the shouting, and he glared at the alpha, âI told you, I am visiting my aunt. I donât storm around yelling each time to see your mother.â
Any other time Jayce would have backed down but now it only fueled the alpha more.
âDonât give me that shit, youâre running away! Iâve tried to be respectful and give you space but Iâm at the end of my rope. I canât even smell you or touch you and you wonât look at me. Just fucking talk to me!â
The anger had simmered down and left exhaustion in its wake, Jayce tried to control his ragged breaths. He risked a glance at his mate and any remaining fight left at the omegas expression of hurt.
Once again Jayce didnât know what to say, how to cross the divide that was now starkly apparent.
âIs it serious?â
Viktor gave a humorless chuckle at the question that had Jayceâs soul wilt. Jayce couldnât and wouldnât imagine a life without Viktor, if it was serious then the alpha would figure something out.
Jayce would tear apart the fabric of reality itself if it meant Viktors life was safe.
âWhat is it?â
He only knew a handful of serious diseases, but he would learn, learn everything there was to know and go from there. Jayce looked at Viktor, whoâs gaze was fixed into the coffee table.
Jayce wished the omega hadnât been dousing himself in scent blockers so religiously, at least then he could have an idea on what Viktor was feeling.
The realization that Viktor was using scent blockers to mask the scent of illness stole Jayceâs breath and he felt pricks behind his eyes. He forced the growing desperation down and when he looked back up Viktor was staring at him.
âIâve caused you so much pain, I was trying to protect you but hurt you instead.â
He sounded broken and shut his eyes before sighing.
âWait here for a moment. I have something to show you.â
Viktor shakily got to his feet and Jayce instinctively went to his side, offering a hand that the omega took with an echo of a smile.
Once his crutch was firmly in place Viktor squeezed Jayceâs lingering hand and walked into their office.
At the soft click of the door closing Jayce collapsed onto the couch, burying his head in his hand. His leg bounced with restless energy, and he fought back the overwhelming panic looming over him.
The silence was deafening and broken only by the sound of the clock ticking the seconds away. An eternity passed by before the door opened and Jayce was on his feet without hesitation.
Viktor walked over to him; face carefully blank except for his eyes that shone with something Jayce couldnât place.
The omega held out a packet of papers that Jayce took numbly, product successfully distributed Viktor made his way to the kitchen as Jayce stared at the papers that finally held answers that deep down, he was scared to know.
Sitting back on the couch his hands shook as he began skimming through the information. Fear gave way to confusion as Jayce went through the pack.
Fetal development, carrier health, estimated timeline and due date.
The words all blended together, and Jayceâs confusion only grew, flipping more until he found something that had the world stop.
An ultrasound that clearly showed a tiny human curled up in its temporary home.
Jayceâs head shot up and he gaped at Viktor who was watching him closely.
âYou? Youâre?â
Words failed him completely and he looked back at the image, standing he held up the photo.
âYouâre pregnant?â
Viktor had raised an eyebrow at Jayceâs stutters but shifted under Jayceâs stare.
âYes, approximately 18 weeks.â
Jayce felt air leave his lungs and he strode over, suddenly desperate to be closer to the man. Looking he could see the layers Viktor had begun to wear, layers to hide the evidence of their growing child.
He wanted to feel the proof, he wanted to gather Viktor into his arms and never let go, he wanted to show the world his mate. Instead, a cold rush of realization had him freezing, staring at Viktors stomach.
âHow long have you known?â
Viktor absent mindedly ran a hand over the hidden swell before quickly dropping it to his side, Jayce forced his gaze up to look at his mate's face.
Viktor averted his eyes, â10 weeks or so.â
Jayce recoiled and fought the urge to grab Viktorâs shoulders to force the man to look at him.
âWhy didnât you tell me? Were you ever going to tell me?â
Viktor tensed and ran a hand through his hair before finally meeting Jayceâs eyes.
âI wanted to wait until there was a child that could be celebrated.â
Jayce stepped closer, all the overwhelming emotions that he had been keeping under a semblance of control just under the surface and threatening to burn over.
âWhat does that mean?â
Viktorâs jaw tensed, âit means that I was waiting to make sure the child would survive. That my body could truly support and grow life. If I had told you when I first learned, only to lose a doomed child it would have destroyed you.â
The words held the same calmness Viktor had when talking about his mother's slow death and Jayce wanted to pull his own hair out.
âYou canât make choices for me like that, Vitya. Even if that had happened.â
He ran a hand through his hair and continued in a softer tone.
âYou should have told me from the beginning, this is our child, and weâre partners. Never walk alone, we swore that to each other.â
Viktorâs shoulders fell and his hand splayed across his stomach, Jayceâs throat threatened to close at how his partner shrank into himself.
âThe doctors, I saw the notes but what do they say?â
Jayce moved just a bit closer as he questioned Viktor.
âThey are hopeful. Against the odds the child is growing, thriving and healthy.â
Jayce swallowed past the formed lump in his throat, âand you? Are you ok?â
Viktor smiled at that, as if Jayce had said something funny when he asked about his mate's health.
âI have a new array of vitamins and a list of what I need to do, but my health is good.â
A weight Jayce wasnât aware of lifted and the alpha finally gave into his instincts. Wrapping his mate firmly in his arms, pressing a desperate kiss into brown locks.
Viktor hesitated for a beat before returning the embrace just as ferociously, pressed so close Jayce could feel the swell against his own torso.
Pulling away Jayce captured Viktors perfect lips with his own, his mind racing but his heart momentarily at peace. Cradling Viktorâs cheek, he felt excitement swell until it was the only thing he could feel.
âHoly shit Vitya. Weâre going to be parents!â
Viktor returned his beam with a smaller smile, eyes capturing the light and gleaming gold. Jayce prayed their child had Viktors eyes, his smile, moles, and everything Viktor.
Their child, it was such an insane concept and shifted Jayceâs entire world view. Looking down he could see the faint outline of a bump even with Viktors hiding, his hand twitched at the urge to feel for himself.
âYou can feel it. There is nothing to feel so far but-â
Jayceâs hands had moved to splay over the bump the moment Viktor gave his consent. Without thinking he moved his hands to go under some of the layers. His heartbeat loudly in his ears as he felt the swell, the firmness that proved that there was a life they created.
Jayce didnât remove his hands and buried his face in Viktors neck, he would do anything for his family.















