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rainbow tethered cloud clots of scale and feather... #csartworks #art #drawing #painting #illustration #symbol #sigil #sigillum #insignia #signiature #scribble #scribbles #automatism #quetzalcoatl #feathered #serpent #rainbow #quadrad #dragon #bird #weird #dark #light
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I’m so blessed.
So last night I created a group chat for our Quadrad. We started talking about how C and I want to go out to Washington to visit K & S, and that’s when C suggest a middle meeting point instead. I was already planning on visiting C this summer, so now I will look into extending my trip, having a few days with him first before K & S join us. S expressed a hard limit for him in terms of sexual activity or group things, and it was just an awesome moment for us all to validate and affirm him, and let him know that he is respected and cared about. I called him to check in afterwards, assessing his feelings as he has never had more than one partner at a time and has legitimate concerns and feelings. After he felt better, I let him go to spend time with K. But in the group chat, we all talked about how each of us wants the others to all feel respected, loved, cared for, and validated. We agreed to have a sit-down “family” meeting when they first arrive to the airbnb we intend to stay at, and discuss boundaries, triggers, concerns, etc. I am so excited for this meetup, and am feeling so blessed to have stumbled into this polyamorous family of ours. We all come from places of compassion and understanding, and work to build one another up and support one another, in whatever capacities that may be.
some details of tales... ave save cloud clot rainbow rot... #details #csartworks #art #drawing #painting #illustration #symbol #sigillum #insignia #signiature #automatism #scribble #scribbles #weird #dark #light #colour #quadrad
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My quadrad is kind of dismantling before me and I have really mixed feels about it. I'm super apprehensive about the June meetup right now. I'd only go to spend time with S. I don't know if C wants a relationship with me anymore, the way he is acting says not. I don't want a friendship with K. Tbh his constant depressive mindset and self loathing is something I just don't want to be around. Plus he doesn't seem to respect my need for boundaries with metamours. Or at least understand it. A conversation this morning made it seem like he was saying "Well that's a 'you' issue." I just feel really singled out and isolated lately. Which is funny because S and I are growing and developing a deeper emotional and supportive connection and creating safe space for one another. And J's boys want to meet me and she met my mom last week and my Mom really likes her. So I have these two great relationships right now and yet other connections are crumbling. I have very mixed and bittersweet feels and don't know how to deal with them. =/
Happy Quad, Happy Life.
Last night went well with communicating with my partners.
First, I had a productive call with S. Reminded him of his capabilities and rights as a sub, and also went over adjusting our relationship agreement to better cater to our schedules and self care. I even was able to run something by him before discussing it with C.
I then waited for C to finish his video call with K. Apparently it was their first, YAY! I hope they have many more to come. I was able to talk to him on the phone after about the time zone difference (K &S are 3 hours behind us!) and C and I agreed on a time for our nightly bedtime call so I’m not up super late… I also suggested a group calendar app, and C jumped right on setting the calendar up!
I’m glad we are all on board and want to better our communication and work around one another’s needs. I’m starting to designate days for my partners- J looks like she will be getting Fridays, S and I’s play dates will probably be on Tuesdays or Wednesdays. Having the app allows me to add various events and dates, as I think I’m the only one dating rn outside of the quad, and C has his mono husband.
All 3 of my quadlings (I’m making that a word) are super supportive of me dating and playing around with others. As long as I am safe and happy. ^_^
My life is crazy, but I am feeling so fulfilled and happy.
Life is good.
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