#pyrohydriscence

F in the chat

Can I interest you in the very beautiful and queer steam game Hades? You play the prince of Hell trying to break out of Hades, make nice with your friends and family, get a boyfriend and or girlfriend, reunite lost tragic lovers, etc.

Their plans are pretty terrible but they got the beacon through an impromptu freestyle heist that had no business working so I’m voting for “accidentally assassinate trent and make it look like a freak garden party accident”

@pyrohydriscence

A talented and wonderful person took the time to translate Pyrohydriscence into Spanish!

I have pretty well checked on DC, is that Batwoman Stephanie Brown? With the blonde hair and the eggplant costume?

I am 100% not the anon but if they don't pop up with a clarification, I vote for Fjord/Jester because that would be amazing.

“Fjord,” Jester says, bursting into the room with her own sort of aplomb, not bothering to knock. Fjord’s gotten used to this, generally, although it’s led to a few awkward moments of Jester opening the door on him in various states of undress. Awkward for him, mostly. Jester takes it in stride, typically. “Fjord guess what.” 

The tiefling takes a seat on Fjord’s bed, bouncing a few times as if to test the springs of the inn’s bed. 

“Uhh,” Fjord says, because he has next to no idea where to even begin guessing. With Jester it could be anything. “You had a good trip to the market?” 

Jester pouts. “... That’s not even a guess.” 

Fjord shrugs, then guesses. “You vandalized another temple?” 

Jester giggles, shoulders up almost around her ears in the way that makes her almost unbearably cute. “That is a good guess but no. My mom got you a gift!” She reaches into her eye-searingly pink bag up to the elbow and roots around until she produces a paper-wrapped parcel. There is a note attached to the top in Marion Lavore’s impeccable handwriting. 

Fjord takes the lumpy thing from Jester, feeling the heft of it. The card on top reads ‘For Fjord, as thanks for looking after my Jester so well. Stay warm!’ He carefully peels apart the paper, revealing the woolen sweater underneath. 

“Wow, uh,” Fjord says, unfurling the knitted thing. It’s surprisingly rustic, coming from Jester’s elegant mother. “I dunno what to say. Thanks.”

Jester watches this whole process with wide eyes, leaning forward eagerly. “She knitted it,” she informs him helpfully. 

Fjord raises both his eyebrows. “Your mom knits?”

Again, Jester pouts. She’s so incredibly expressive, it was one of the first things that struck Fjord about the tiefling. “What’s wrong with knitting?”

“Nothing,” Fjord backpedals hastily. “My own ma used to knit. It’s just-- she never expressed such a talent when we were visiting her is all.” 

And like that the squall is cleared and Jester is smiling again. “Oh,” she says. “She says it helps her to de-stress. She knitted all of my baby booties and my baby blankets and once she knit a sock for a guy’s dick because he couldn’t get it up and he blamed it on the cold.” 

Fjord chokes, wondering how that poor bastard must have felt receiving that. “That is one man I would not want to be.”

“He thought it was funny,” Jester says quickly. “After a few weeks.” 

Fjord laughs, thinking fondly of the warmth that Marion showed her only daughter during their too-short visit. “Well tell her I appreciate it very much. Did uh... did the others get sweaters?”

Jester shakes her head. “No. She sent Nott an earring, and she sent Beau a bill for keeping the owl and she sent some tea for Caduceus though. She knit me a sweater too, do you wanna see?” 

Fjord nods, and waits as Jester digs out her own sweater, and tries not to dig too hard into what it means that Marion Lavore spent her hard-won free time hand-making him a gift to thank him for taking such good care of her daughter. 

Percival: Tell me something I don’t know. Newt: A pig’s orgasm can last up to thirty minutes.

Elementary; Season 1, Episode 9: You Do It To Yourself

for @pyrohydriscence

Now for something completely different 

We're pushing hard on this for summer reading but we haven't gone all the way yet - we have a lot of kids whose parents have screwed them over library card wise and we don't want to punish them for their parents inability to return their dvds.

omg this is an important point to bring up! thank you :)