Whumptober Day 18: Panic Attacks (Laurance Zvehlin)
@linariouswrites​ @doubi-ixi​ @thethistlegirl​
Cute rescue dragons under the cut
Panic at the Disco
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Laurance was struggling to feel his fingers. He knew he was panicking. He felt useless and pathetic. He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stop it. He could only watch from the corner of his mind, helpless as his brain fell into chaos.Â
The semni closed his eyes and panted. He was chained to a wall, his back bare chilled by the dungeon air. He could hear the whip cracks down the hall and the screams of another person. He knew those screams. His back ached with them. His old whip scars were still raised and strangely colored. They still looked like they could come apart at the seams.
Laurance fell apart a little more as the cracking sounds stopped. He was hyperventilating. He couldn't’ use any of the air coming into his lungs. His hands shook and he no longer even fought for control. All he could do was spin and writhe in the panic that overtook his mind.Â
The door opened. The one tiny corner of his mind that he was still in control of listened carefully. Footstep. Footstep. Footstep. Stop. There was a crack and Laurance shuddered, a whimper coming from behind frozen lips even though he hadn’t even been whipped. There was a cruel laugh. A crack again and Laurance flinched as the stone chipped beside his head.
“I thought you were supposed to be a hero,” a degrading voice said as Laurance clenched his fists tightly.Â
That grounds Laurance ever so slightly. He’s heard this speech a thousand times. He is a hero. It’s okay to be afraid. It’s alright to panic. You can still be scared and be a hero. Sometimes, you just have to give yourself a minute to calm down.Â
But this man didn’t give him a minute. The whip cracked down across Laurance’s shoulders and the pain brought back his panic. That sound so close to his ears made it so much worse. The pain and the cuts weren’t as bad as that first time. The time he was in the hands of that Scaleon. The mental torture, the pauses in strikes, hearing the door open as if Rogue was going to leave only for another smattering of earthshattering cracks to come down on his back. No, this time wasn’t anything like that. But his body was afraid.
The man left. Laurance didn’t notice. He sobbed and shook, vibrating in pain. It wasn’t as bad as the first time, but it still hurt. He didn’t know how much time passed. He only swirled in his head, flinching at every noise.Â
The door opened again. Quick steps crossed the room and someone knelt by him. Cold hands touched his face. Kiera’s hands. Laurance opened his eyes to see his best friend’s wife kneeling there. There was pain in her face. Laurance lost any control he had in his breathing and his shaking grew worse.Â
Kiera had him free in a moment and was cradling him to her chest. He could easily hear her heart beats and feel her breathing. He started to match it unconsciously. It was something he had learned how to do. Match his breathing with his friends. With his family.
There were warm hands on his back. Rin. The medic cleaned the cuts and massaged warm ointments into the. Then, he felt Anisha cuddle up to him and hold his hands. He buried his face in her neck as Kiera rubbed her hands through his hair and Rin continued to clean Laurance’s wounds. The four were connected in their minds, so it was easy to feel their love and their concern for him. Laurance emptied his panics, his fear, every moment of his capture into them. They took it.Â
Other people wouldn’t be able to handle someone else's problems so fully, and teams often fell apart because of it, but this team never kept secrets. They shared everything. They helped each other with everything. Laurance couldn’t imagine wanting privacy from this. This was safe. This was home. He never wanted to have secrets. He always wanted his team to see with him. He wanted them to help him heal and he wanted to help heal them.Â
It was what made them the strongest team in the Teliar. It was what made them the strongest servants of the Aura. It was what made them The Adventurers.Â
Laurance could breathe again.
