#pitiful

Track Four is Not About You by L.M. Bennett (4th) Bishop left without a word. Shiloh never knew why. Four years later, neither of them has recovered. Now Bishop’s album is falling apart, and the only producer who understands her sound is the ex she ghosted. Shiloh doesn’t do chaos, second chances, or Bishop. But when she hears that dying demo, something cracks. Because the raw honesty on that…

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When thinking of myself in relation to you,

My mind continuously flickers the image of a dog.

Hound. Cur. Puppy. Mutt.

Different names and connotations, all of which mean "dog."

All of which mean me.

Hound.

Hunting canine. Trailing, chasing, baying. Hounding. Tracking, one track, mind on you, following, following. Never letting up for breath, because it cannot understand.

Cur.

Snarling mongrel. Unapproachable, aggressive yet ever cowardly. Ever fearful. For it knows it is inferior - a low breed. A stray. Barring teeth I will never use.

Puppy.

Foolish whelp. Pathetic, pitiful, pleading with big, rose-blinded eyes. Begging and whining incessantly, whimpering still when kicked quiet.

Mutt.

Impure vermin. Tainted, stained, of lesser value. Lesser worth because of the blood in their veins, blood under my nails, blood in my unclean, sinful mouth.

When thinking of myself in relation to you,

I am nothing more and nothing less

Than a dog.

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